Love It , Or Hate It. "The beginning"

beginnings

ever since me and ralonzo's blow out, I have been focusing on what I need to do in order to fulfill my foundation. I can't lie ,I miss him - but I won't place myself in a situation where ralonzo isn't going to comply with what i want in order to be happy. it hurts just thinking about it. pulling up to the agency, I run into the creep that I didn't want to run into. only this time he's not alone. keilo walks pasts my car with veronica by his side. " Damn, when did this shit come to par?" I say to my self as I get ready to get out of my benz. "this is the big day girl!?" a woman with a cheery high pitch voice says from behind me.  "yes ,it is-say do I know you?" the woman looks at me confusingly as if I had said some thing that hurt her feelings. "im sure that we have met before. im casandra adams, -administrator for the big shots in the magazine section of modeling. your andre'yah sommes?" she asks holding her hand out for a shake. "yes, I am. do I have a big shoot or something?". I am confused as shit, and by lack of information, im not sure if she's my agent or not. "come along with me,- drake get the scene set up so we can get this show on the road, whoo!". Cassandra was proud of her job , and she showed it with pride and gratitude. my mind drifts off to another world. I sadly think about how proud my best friend would have been to see me succeed with my number one dream. I hope things are well with lonzo as well. It's crazy how I miss him and think about him at times. thinking about how things would have been if we just stayed together and succeeded together. joy , love , and laughter. The three main things I wanted .

one day, there would be someone hopefully ready to give me those things-hopefully ralonzo is the one...

After the photo shoot ended, Cassandra and I exchanged numbers and I went on my way to my car to leave before drake stops me in my tracks. "um, do I know you?" I asked confused as to why he had stopped me. was he trying to ask me out on a date? so many questions were swimming in my head, I couldn't stay focused. "I'm sorry, I don't think I introduced myself properly. my name is drake, and as you can see I work for vogue myself. I also a male model too. you're name is?" He was a sweetheart, tall , and muscular. In a way, he reminded me of ralonzo,- but prettier.

After my meeting with vogue agency, I couldn't wait to make it to my los Angeles condo , right off the highway, near the beach. The smell of the ocean before me relaxed me, and mainly how I have been getting over the break up between ralonzo and I. God knows that that was my first love, but to sound so desperate lowered my self esteem. I was turning into a person that I didn't like. "I just want to get to you better". my phone rang scoring the shit out of me. "who could this person be?" I asked out loud to myself only because all of my contacts had assigned ringtones. looking at the screen, it read private. as bad as I didn't want to answer the phone call, pushed me to answering the phone call.  "Hello, this is andre'yah sommes," I answered professionallprofessionally because it could have been business calling my name. "hello, andre'yah? " the questioning deep voice said in surprise. "yes, this is her- who are you, and how do you know of me?" I asked awkwardly over the phone as if the killer off of scream called me. " Its me, andre'yah. I have been trying to get ahold of you for months. I've been missin' your sexy ass like crazy, and I want you to just hear me out for a sec". Ralonzo! I shouted with in my head. My heart began to beat a hundred times per minute,  and before I knew it,-a kool-aid smile was pointed on my face. "Hello?" Ralonzo asked again over the phone. "yes, I'm here,-how did you get my number?" I asked trying to place the tough act on him. I have to admit,  the reason of why we broke up was stupid, but things happen right? " I got your number from a near by friend in L.A. He works at the same agency as you, and he said that he had known you;Thats not the reason that I am calling, I'm. calling to see what you are doing tonight since I'm in town- we seriously need to talk." His voice sounds. concerned as if something had happened. "What happened? Is there something wrong?" I began to asked much worried of the fact that the tone of his voice was a little eerie. "Ralonzo? are you there?" my worries began to grow stronger, and my suspicions grew even wider. something must not be right, I must find out - is it my mother?  father? who? and what? " I'm here, I'm sending you a ride out to your house to come pick you up around seven. wear something that screams "you", and no excuses for why you can't come-this is a serious meeting." Ralonzo's voice sounded some what serious, and many thoughts popped into my head. I'm worried  out of my mind now, and to release this stress, I had to call my friend jake.

                  *5:30pm*

finally getting home, I quickly ran the water for my bath, and picked an out fit for tonight. Since this dinner is special, I lay out an baby blue silk Louis Vuitton romper, with my red bottom heels to match.

I haven't talk to him in a while,so what ever this meeting's about, I hope its nothing bad.

I don't want any surprises, and I hope everything's okay at home with my mom. slowly slipping my feet into the warm bubble bath, I grab for my things and then the phone rings. wiping the water from my hands, I grab for the cordless hours phone and notice its my girl shawnie.

"hello, what's up?"

I say into the reciever while soaking back into the suds. "girl nothin', about done with this project checking on my girl."

Shawnie was there when I first moved here, and still is there. "I think I miss him. he was the first man I have ever loved." After those words had left my mouth, I began to think. thinking back to the times when were  happy, and things were the way that they were.

shifting my position in the tub, I place the phone down, putting on the head set. "mmm, so he's still on your mind? I can understand. but why so much?" Shawnie sounded concerned. As if I was wrong to feel this way, but why? if you love someone, then why not let it be known? "why you sound like that for? ralonzo and I were sweethearts, can't forget your first. I just miss him, and if everything goes right tonight, we can go back to old times." I say with hope in my voice. He's a NFL player, there's no telling what he might be doing in his spare time, I just hope it isn't anything that'll force us to be apart for a long time. "I'm not say in' that he is fucking around, I just know how you love that boy, and for you to feel like that and not be-" Before I could allow her to finish the last part of what she was going to say, I stop her in her tracks. "Let's become negative about how I feel about him, I have faith that things will come together- I just can't deal with the negative thoughts." getting out of the tub, I grab for my towel and wrap it around my body. I look over at the clock and notice that time was getting away. so I finish up the conversation and get dressed for my "meeting". Sitting at my vanity, all my make-up is laid out just for tonight's event. I am a model-for fashion is a must to have. I make sure my hair, and my nails are done before I leave out to any event. Finishing up my prepping, I take one last look into the mirror to see that every thing is in tact, and head down the stairs to await for my date. after cutting off all the lights upstairs,  a feeling comes over me. Something of fear and suspicion. the feeling of safety swept from under my feet, and fear had struck with in me. "something isn't right." I say as I check the top half of the house again. Everything had seemed to be in tact, except for one thing. What was it? I couldn't figure it out for nothing. so I go back down stairs to see the lights off. "what the fuck?!" I say out of fear. my stomach begins to turn, and my head begins to spin. Something was taking over me, and I didn't know what it was. nothing but questions swarmed in my head. I didn't want to assume that I was a victim of robbery, but of some sort of prank. "please god, Dont allow anything to harm me, walk with me." I silently pray aloud. Before I knew it with a turn, something had struck me, and total darkness had fell over me.....

the room was dark. not a thing to be seen in sight. the room was silent, with a bitter breeze. chills went up my body. Everything was blurry, and I couldn't tell where I was at. My body was numb. Suddenly, I hear a echo of fast movement around me.

What the hell was going on? Where the fuck was I? I was too weak to panic. I felt as if I was drugged.

Then a voice had spoke to me....

"you really got it all don't you lil' girl, you must think you are the shit with then fake ass red bottoms, huh? You know, I'm your worst enemy, and to fuck with me, would be about the dumbest thing to do. If you want to see you life of dreams expand, I suggest that you keep 'way from ya boy. Death will strike soon."

After the words were said, I tried to pinpoint whose voice it was that was talking shit. Anger struck within me, but I still couldn't move.