When Can I Hear Your Voice?

Coming Out -Matt

After two months of dating Jace, I don't think I have been happier. I have got to know him so much better. I think that it may be because he wants a kiss, but whenever we talk I notice that he stares at my lips. Then again, he watches everyone's lips.

At his house alone, we are snuggled up on his bed. The comforter is black with a fire-red bird with its wings spread out. He told me about it before but I wasn't really listening. I was too busy admiring his stunning features.

"If I would have known you where coming over I would have cleaned up a bit." He intertwines his fingers with mine.

His floor was spotless. His books perfectly organized, nothing on his desk, there wasn't even any dog hair on his bed or clothes. "Jace, your room is too clean. You're fine; you don't have to clean for me." He quickly kisses my check, I kiss his lips, "Hey, I have a question" I say pulling away

"Yeah?" he fiddles with my hands.

"Well actually two." He nods me to go on, "First one is, at the wedding, you were looking at an old photo." He leans over me, grabbing his phone. He flips it open and scrolls through the gallery. Then he showed me a picture of a gorgeous woman. She looked to be in her twenties. Her blonde hair and stunning blue eyes looked just like his. She was smiling into the camera. She was wearing a black winter jacket and had a little bit of makeup on. It looked like the picture was taken in a forest. "She is beautiful. Who is she?"

"My mom."

There was an eerie silence, "Oh."

"Go ahead." He put his phone away.

"Go ahead and what?"

"Ask questions. I know you want to. Everyone does."

I run my hands though his perfectly blonde hair then though his deep midnight black hair, "What is your natural colour?"

He laughs, "That was the most interesting first question about my mom but blonde."

"Did she come with you guys to America?"

He gave a sad smile, "No."

"Did they get a divorce?"

"No."

"Is she just not around much?"

"No."

"Then where is she?" I was asking him so many questions, he was answering them all.

"She died in a car crash."

That stopped me, "She died? I-I'm sorry. Now I feel bad for asking all those questions" He cut me off with a kiss.

"It happened when I was four. It's okay, don't feel bad." He tells me all about his car accident and how his mom died, as well as his coma.

After a while of silent cuddling I whisper, "C-can I ask my next question?"

"Sure" he smiles

"Why are you always watching my lips? Do you want a kiss that bad?" I joke about the kissing part.

I hadn't seen that kind of terror on his face since we had that project together, "Um, well, that's because, well" He was frozen, at a complete loss of words.

"It's fine if you don't want to answer. I was just curious"

He swallowed hard, "I, it started with the car accident. I have never told anyone this. You are the first person and I feel like I can trust you with my life and my deepest secrets." Tears form in his eyes as he moves to the edge of the bed he wasn't looking at me. His voice cracks "I can't he-" I put my hand under his chin and lift his face up. I slowly pull him into a slow and warm kiss. I couldn't bear to see him like this. I regret asking about it so I comfort him in the only way I could think of.

The door to his room opened and his dad was standing in the entrance way. More horror was struck in his face. I gradually pull away biting my bottom lip. This is no way to come out to your parent.

His eyes were squeezed shut, "Папа?" (Papa?)