Far Out!

Herb's Amazing Gift

This dirty little drabble was inspired by the idea of certain t-shirts the Overkills might wear courtesy of http://grayzelleposts.tumblr.com/post/145295831489/scarlet-wears-the-shirt-that-says-im-scarlet

Content alert:  some salty language, a wee bit o' steamy action, Herb being sneaky

One fine summer day at the Overkills' fortress, Scarlet was sitting in the living room drinking tea and reading a fashion magazine when Herb arrived, carrying a gift box. A glossy pink bow gave the mystery package an elegant touch.

She looked up with a wide, bright smile as he strolled toward her with his usual foxy grace. She tried, and failed, to avoid looking at the box like an overeager child. Was it for her? She sure hoped so. Herb's gifts were always groovy.

"Hi, honey." She set the magazine aside. "Did you have a productive day in town?"

He bent down to kiss her cheek. "Traffic was a nightmare, but yeah, I scored everything I needed. Including this!" he said, holding up the box.

Her stomach fluttered with excitement as she held a hand to her chest. "What is it?"

"A gift for my queen, of course."

"Oh, Herb, how thoughtful! But it's not my birthday yet. What's the occasion?"

"The way I see it, every day is a great day to treat my beautiful wife." He handed her the box with a flourish.

"Aww, you're so sweet." Scarlet bit her lip as she accepted his gift.

Herb bounced onto the sofa beside her.

She chuckled. "My goodness, somebody's pumped about something."

"I'm just excited about giving you this gift."

Scarlet smiled. "That makes two of us."

Whatever could it be? She deftly unwrapped the bow. Then she removed the top. Heart pounding, she carefully unfolded the delicate white tissue paper. Some kind of fabric lay beneath. She scooped it up and set aside the box.

She shook out the material and discovered it was a t-shirt. Red with black trim. Stretching it between her hands, she read the printed black text out loud. "'I'm Scarlet Fucking Overkill'." With a laugh, she hugged the shirt to her chest. "Herb, it's perfect!" She held the shirt out again to admire it. "So funny, and yet so true."

"So you dig it?"

"I sure do. Can't wait to wear it around town."

"Try it on!"

"Right now?"

Herb nodded enthusiastically.

With a "why not?" shrug, she reached for the collar of her casual, sleeveless blouse. The days had become warm enough that she'd recently splurged on dozens of shorts and fashionable summer tops.

Her husband inched closer, so close his breath warmed her cheek. "Need any help with the buttons?" he murmured.

She giggled. "Thanks, but I got this."

She eased off her blouse and reached for her new t-shirt. After she slipped it over her head, Herb pressed his hand against her arm and looked at her solemnly. "I think you'll be much more comfortable if you take off your bra."

Her brows furrowed, and then she realized he was probably getting randy. Regardless, she was going to try on her new shirt first. But she didn't mind teasing him a bit on the way.

She grinned. "Naughty boy."

He chuckled. "You don't know the half of it."

"Is that so?"

Reaching back, she unhooked her bra and slid it off. Herb dropped his gaze to her chest with unabashed interest. Her nipples perked up in response, which in turn made his lips part a tad wider than before.

The brief show ended as she pulled the hem down to her waist. She smoothed her palm over the soft fabric, which clung to every curve. A perfect fit.

He beamed. "Looks terrific!"

She puffed her chest out a bit. "Makes me feel even more powerful than I already am. Thanks so much!"

Wanting to reward him with a kiss, she reached out to grab his tie, only to discover he wasn't wearing one. Instead, he wore a top other than his purple dress shirt. The exact details of its design were hidden by his jacket.

She latched onto his lapels instead. "C'mere, you."

She planted a soft, moist kiss on his mouth. Then he suddenly pulled back and clasped her hands. "I bought a treat for myself, too." He reached down and unbuttoned his jacket.

"Oh, you got yourself a new shirt? That's great, baby. Let me see."

Herb preened like a peacock as she spread apart his jacket. He wore a t-shirt similar in style to hers—how adorable! Scarlet couldn't have wished for a more considerate husband.

"What does it say?" Her gaze darted over the text. "I...what?" She frowned and peered closer. "'I'm Fucking Scarlet Overkill'." She couldn't believe her eyes. How outrageous!

She shot him a look. "Herb Overkill, are you serious? Really? This is...your shirt says you're fucking me?"

His Cheshire Cat grin revealed that he was, indeed, very serious. "Yeah! Because I totally am!"

She released his jacket as if it were on fire and held her hands to her flaming cheeks. He definitely looked like a fox who'd just returned from a successful raid of the hen house.

"Herb! You are incorrigible!"

"I know, right? But you love me anyway." He slipped his arms around her waist. A twinkle lit his eye. "I've got a groovy idea. Let's fuck right now."

He drew closer, angling for a kiss.

With her breasts mashed against his hard chest, he was making it very difficult for her to refuse. She ought to be scolding him about his cheeky purchase. Instead, she surrendered to his smoldering, half-lidded eyes and hot, questing mouth. She moaned softly as they melted into each other.

As the kissing intensified, he palmed her right breast and gave it a gentle squeeze. It felt so good she began yanking off his jacket. As soon as she flung it away, he trailed a path of soft kisses down the side of her neck. She closed her eyes, swept away on a cloud of bliss.

His hands slipped beneath her t-shirt, pressing warmly against her skin. She clung to his arms and arched her back, a silent plea for more. Herb cupped her bottom and pulled her tightly against him. She straddled his lap and took every last inch of his next hot, wet kiss.

As his roaming hands began possessively exploring her body, a sudden realization left her gasping for breath—Scarlet Overkill was about to get well and truly fucked by the only man for the job.

The End!