Without You There Is No Me (kellic)

Chapter 8

Today, I didn't have any classes. Vic did though, so at the moment, I was in my room alone. I was waiting for Tony because we were going to hangout since neither of us had class to go to.

"Heeeeyyyy Kelllllliiiiin." Tony said as he walked through the door without knocking.

"Hey Turtle-man." I responded to him with a small laugh.

"What's going on?" he asked as he came over and sat backwards in the chair next to my bed. That just brought us into talking about pointless stuff. While we were talking though, I only had one thing on my mind. Vic, of course. I had given up on trying to push away the thoughts early this morning. Now, I had just been letting my mind roam free with thoughts of him. I thought about telling Tony. He was here and I think I can trust him. Besides, I have nobody else to tell. I can't tell Jaime because he just hasn't been being himself lately and there was no way in hell that I was going to tell Vic.

"Hey Tony, can I talk to you about something?" I asked impulsively.

"Yeah sure, anything." He replied.

"Ok, you know how Vic and I are both... gay?" I said with very little confidence. He nodded while giving me a skeptical look.

"Well, two nights ago, I kinda over heard Vic saying... something." I mumbled while twiddling with my thumbs.

"Like what?" He asked, getting anxious.

"He- um... he thought that I was sleeping and he said that he was- uh... that he was falling for me." I barely choked out. Tony's jaw dropped as he looked at me with wide eyes.

"Seriously?" He asked. I nodded.

"Well, do you like him back?"

I didn't really know how to answer this. I mean, of course I like Vic, but I just feel weird admitting it to Tony. I just shrugged.

"You do like him, Kellin." Tony accused.

"What makes you think that?" I asked.

"I've seen the way you look at him. You just have complete adoration in your eyes. Besides, if you didn't like him, you wouldn't be so upset about this." He said, and he was one-hundred percent right. I guess I had made it pretty obvious if he was so positive.

"You're right." I said as I sighed and plopped by back down on the bed with my fingers tangled in my own hair. "So what should I do?"

"Well, do you want to go out with him?" He asked. Of course I do.

"Yeah. Like, a lot." I responded. A grin formed on his face.

"Then tell him." He said, still with a grin on his face. I shook my head.

"I can't. It's not that easy, Tony." I said.

"Sure it is. Just tell him the way you told me." He tried to convince me. He's making it sound so simple but in reality, I know I would just chicken out again before I could tell Vic.

"No. There's no way I could do it. Its different when I'm talking to you. I'm not nervous around you." I explained.

"Well no matter what you say, I'm not gonna let you pass up this opportunity. It's either you tell him, or I'll do it for you." Tony said trying to reason.

"No, no, no. Whatever you do, don't tell him yourself." I said, thinking of how awkward this whole situation could get.

"So you're going to do it?" He asked. I looked up at him in uncertainty.

"You're telling him, and that's an order." He demanded. It wasn't in a bad way though. I was actually really glad that he was so supportive of this whole situation. I still know that there is a huge chance of me messing this up if I tell him myself.

"Ok, fine." I replied, even though I haven't totally convinced myself. I looked down trying to plan out how I would tell Vic.

"You look nervous." Tony pointed out.

"Well, duh." I said with a sigh.

"Kellin, you have no reason to be nervous. We both know that he likes you. He's not going to turn you down. So, when Vic comes back from class, you tell him. And don't be nervous. It'll be fine." He said. Wow. I was surprised at how supportive Tony was. I mean, I didn't expect him to be against it, but he was usually just so quiet.

After that, we changed the topic and I stayed with Tony for about another half hour. Then, I walked with Tony back to his room. At this point, I was extremely nervous because it was getting closer and closer to when I had to face Vic.

When I was leaving Tony's building, I saw Jaime walking towards me so I waved to him. As he got closer, I realized that he had a stressed look on his face.

"Hey, Kellin can I talk to you?" He asked. I was instantly scared of what he was going to say.

"Yeah, sure what is it?" I said.

"I like you." He blurted out.

WHAT!!?!? My eyes widened because I had no idea what to say. I didn't even know that he was gay. Why are there even so many gay people in this school?

"I-I don't know what to say." I said and I must have had the biggest look of sympathy on my face. I really didn't know what to say. I definitely didn't like him like that, but I didn't want to hurt his feelings. Was this why he was acting so weird lately? Did Tony know about this? If he did, I'll kill him.

"It's ok. I knew you wouldn't like me that way, but I had to get it off of my chest." He said as he stared to walk past me. I wanted to turn to him and say something, anything, but I just couldn't. I couldn't form the words in my mouth. I just felt so choked up. By the time I turned around, he was already half way down the hallway.

"What?" I whispered to myself as I turned back towards the door and ran. I ran and ran as fast I could until I was back to my dorm building. I could feel my face burning and I could tell that it looked really red. I just needed to get back to my room and sit down because if I didn't, I was afraid I would pass out mid-run. I was just so confused. It was like I was just piling one stressful thing onto another.

As I finally got back to my room, I remembered that Vic would probably be there. If Jaime was out of class, that means that Vic is too. I didn't really care at the moment though. The most important thing was getting back to the room.

I bursted through the door and collapsed onto my bed. As I turned my head, I saw Vic sitting right there on his bed.

"Kellin, what happened? What's wrong?" He asked. I had to take a minute for my breathing to slow down before I could answer him. I sighed and sat up to look at him. At least this means that I didn't have to tell him about my conversation with Tony right now.

"Well, I was leaving Tony's room and I ran into Jaime." He was standing in front of me so I looked up at him with uncertainty. I wasn't even sure if I should be telling him about this.

"Ok, go on." He said. I sighed again before I continued.

"He told me that h-he, uh, that he likes me." I said getting quieter at the last part. His eyes grew wide and his face must have looked the same way that mine did when Jaime told me.

"Jamie's gay?" Vic said and I nodded. The look on Vic's face was almost one of jealousy.

"What did you say?" He asked.

"I didn't know what to say. I didn't want to hurt his feelings." I replied.

"So, I guess this is a bad time to tell you that I like you too." He said. I looked at him in complete shock. I couldn't believe what I just heard. I did not expect him to say anything about it. How many more things like this could happen in one day?

"S-sorry. I've wanted to tell you that. I just didn't want to miss my chance. I'm sorry." He said. I guess it was time to tell him.

"I like you too." I blurted out. He looked at me with the same shocked expression that I had probably seen a hundred times already today.

"What?" He said.

"That was really hard. Please don't make me say it again." I said, probably sounding stupid.

"Oh, god." Vic whispered before leaning closer to me and pressing his lips to mine.