It Was Always You | l.r.h

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A P R I L

16th July 2011,
                          
                           Dear Luke, Happy 15th birthday, Luke! I hope you're having an amazing day! I hope you liked your present (if Calum gave you it).

I sent him it through the post. I didn't realise how much shopping costs. I'm now broke, but you're worth being broke for.

I feel happier when I write to you. There's something that connects me to you when I write. You'll probably be reading this on your 16th birthday. (That kinda scares me).

Michael is due to be coming to stay at mine soon. I'm excited to see him. I need someone who knows me well.

James is meant to move in with us when Michael leaves. I'm not sure how to feel about it. I haven't saw him since I was five. I Skype him every week, but I haven't saw him in person for 10 years!

I heard that he's now got a girlfriend, who I'll probably meet. I'm not sure how long they've been dating for, or what she looks like.

I'm a little bit scared to tell him what happened between us. I haven't told him that we ended things. For all he knows, we're still dating.

I don't really know how to tell him. I'm not that close to him, I wish I was. I'm closer to my cousin than I am to my own brother.

I thought older brothers were meant to protect you and be there for you. But James hasn't. He protected me when I was 5. But he hasn't been here for 10 years.

I want to get to know him better. I know some interesting and weird things about him, but I'll probably know more about him soon.

Ive been listening to a lot of All Time Low recently and I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because we used to always listen to them, I'm not sure.

I'm currently trying not to fall asleep writing this, it's 2:45am. I haven't been able to sleep recently and I'm not sure why. Maybe I should go to the doctors and see if there's something wrong with me.

My body can't still be on the Australian time zone, I've lived here for 4 months now. I need to sleep.

I hope you had an amazing day, Luke. I hope you got everything you wanted.

I love you, Luke, so much, don't ever forget that,
April X

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We were waiting for Michael at arrivals. By we I mean me and mum. We were talking about Michael, Calum and I when we were younger.

My mum was about to start talking about him. I knew it would come up in this conversation. I spotted a long fringed dirty blonde haired boy.

I ran up to him.

"April," he smiled, hugging me.

"Hello," I smiled.

"I've missed you."

"I've missed you too. My mums just over there."