Dead Man Walking (Glanny Fic)

Chapter 43

My feet blindly walk, no sense of where I'm going. I don't even know how long I've been walking before I find myself stood on the edge of a cliff. My eyes adjust to the view but I'm unable to see any of it's beauty any more.

The last time I was here was with Glen. It all seems so far away now. A distant memory haunted by the terrible actions I have done. The sin that now resides within me, staining my heart and soul.

We made love here. I remember the glow of his skin in the moonlight, the feel of his body against mine, the tiny whispers in my hair. Such a passionate act. Sweet, slow, perfect. How did a moment like that become something so hideous as this?

I open the bottle, downing as much as my body can take in one go. It recoils with the kick, fighting the urge to throw up. I'm too much of a coward to do this sober. Even if it's what I deserve, I can't do this sober.

I raise the knife to my throat and close my eyes. My hands are shaking so much. The fear running through me is overbearing. I don't want to do this. But at the same time, I've never wanted so much in my life.

A single tear runs down my cheek as I think of the one I love. I see his face in front of me, and long to touch him. It pains me not being able to hold him in my arms without the conscious effort to hold onto my humanity. Not to be able to kiss his lips without worrying about ripping out his throat.

This is me. This is who I am now. There is no turning back. And I need to rid the world of what I am. I take a deep breath and resign to my fate.

“I'm so sorry, Glen...”

Don't you fucking dare!

My eyes fly open at the ferocity in the sound. I swear I can hear him echoing in the wind. My monster. A new kind of fear washes over me, halting my actions.

You don't get to make that decision, Danny boy. Not whilst I'm still here.

“You're not real!” I scream. My voice echoes around the cliffs until it is eventually drowned out by the crashing of the waves.

Then who are you shouting at?

“Stop it! You're not real!”

I'm as real as you are. Why are you trying to convince yourself otherwise?

“No! You're not real! I'm sick! You're in my head!”

Oh, Danny. You're not sick. You're just waking up.

“Shut up! Stop talking! I'm going to do it!” I hear a sadistic laugh come from inside, and my blood runs cold.

No you won't. You haven't got the balls to kill yourself.

“Watch me! I'm going to do it!” The knife digs into my skin as I push harder. And that laughter stops abruptly.

Go on then. Do it. Tell yourself that you can kill yourself. But we both know that you can't. That you're just a coward.

“You don't know anything about me!”

I know that you enjoyed killing your friends.

“You're wrong!”

Stop lying to yourself. You enjoyed watching the life leaving their eyes. You took pleasure in the knowledge that it was you who ended a life. Two lives of two innocent people.

“That was you! You made me!”

But I don't exist, remember? How can I kill someone when I'm in your head? Hmm?

I shake my head, the knife falling to my side as I clutch my head with the other hand. He's so loud...

“Just shut up! Stop it!”

Face it, Danny. You're a sick twisted fuck. You love every second of the pain you bring to people. Especially of those you love.

“I'm not! I'm innocent!”

Do innocent people kill their friends?

The pain that hacks through me at that comment is horrendous. He's right. I'm not innocent. I'm guilty. I killed my friends. And there's nothing I can do to take it back. But I can end this.

Oh, Danny, Danny, Danny. Stop playing this game now. I'm sick of it. The beautiful truth in this story is that this is who you were meant to be. I've been here this whole time, biding my time. Waiting for something to break you, so that I could escape through the cracks. And what fun I've had. But you need to let go. You need to understand that I am here to stay. You won't kill yourself. You're going to let me out. You're going to let me kill again. You're going to let us kill again.

“No! You're not going to hurt anyone any more! I won't let you!” I bring the knife back up to my throat again, feeling its cool blade against my skin.

Stop trying to stop me, Danny. I've already won.

“No! No you haven't! I can still beat you! I can still win!”

For a second, there's silence. Cold, hard, empty silence in my mind. I can finally hear how hard I'm panting, finally hear the pounding of my heart. I don't like it.

As I open my eyes, laughter explodes in my head. I cry out with the sheer pain, buckling slightly with the force of it. It's so cruel. How can anything sound like this?

You're right. I haven't yet. There's still one more life to take.

My heart stops. Glen...

“You won't touch him!” I scream out with the last bit of strength I can muster. “I won't let you touch him!”

I will make sure that you watch the blood of Glen Power run through your fingers.

“No!”

Stop fighting. Just give in to me. Let me kill him.

“No! Never! Stop it! Just stop it!”

I feel a hand on my shoulder. He's no longer in my head. He's real.

A red haze clouds my vision and I spin around, ramming the knife deep into flesh with a blood curdling roar. I hear a splutter of agony and I grin. I've done it. I've won.

But the triumphant laugh inside of me chills my bones...

I will make sure that you watch the blood of Glen Power run through your fingers...

My grin fades and the cloud slowly lifts. A hand grabs onto my shirt as the body slumps against me I can feel the laboured breathing against my chest, but I can't move. Who is this?

And when the cloud is finally gone, I see those eyes in front of me. Those big blue eyes...

Got you.

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A/N - I'm just going to...leave this here. And once again. I'm sorry. Vote, comment, do your thing. Much love x