Dead Man Walking (Glanny Fic)

Chapter 32

I'm stood in my empty room, looking out of the window at my perfect little haven that I've built here. Everything about this place is safe. Secure. Mine. I can't really imagine a life outside of my little bubble.

But I suppose I'm going to have to now, aren't I?

All four of us talked about this. Or, rather, they talked and I listened. I've never seen them look so excited about something. And Glen...oh Glen, the look in his eyes at the possibility of having normality. I know he would stay here if he had to, but I also know that he wants to have a normal relationship. One where he can walk down the street hand-in-hand with the one he loves, where he can sit in the park and watch the ducks in his lover's arms. And in this bubble, he can't have that. Because there's nothing here but me.

How could I say no to that face? That little smile of his, the glint in his eye? There was no way I could say no. I love him, and I want to make him happy. This will make him happy.

But I'm scared.

I'm scared of the pressure that will be put on me once I get back there. I mean, it's not as if I'm someone that will blend into the background. I'm the lead singer of a band who went crazy. Who drank himself into a hole and lost his mind. Who attacked his band-mate, his best friend, the love of his life...

What will they think of me? I mean, it's going to be common knowledge when I return. The media will be all over me for sure. And then I'll have to see the headlines and know what they all really think of me...

I don't know if I can handle it. But I'm sure as hell going to try.

I feel arms wrap around me and it brings me back. I smile to myself as I feel him kiss my shoulder gently.

“Hey,” I mumble.

“Hey beautiful,” he purrs. I take hold of his wrist, pulling him closer to me. I still can't get over the things he makes me feel. “How you doing?”

“Yeah...I'm okay.”

“Are you really?”

What should I do? Should I tell him how terrified I am for this whole thing? Or should I lie and tell him what he wants to hear.

“Sort of,” I decide upon.

“Are you scared?”

“Yes. But I'm happy. I'm starting again, away from all of this stuff. Going back to the world that you belong in.”

“You belong there too, Danny.”

I don't answer. I can't answer. I don't believe him yet. And I don't want to tell him. But my silence says it all. He unravels his arms and turns me to face him. Taking my hands in his, he looks at me with a look of pure, undeniable love.

“You belong in the real world, Danny O'Donoghue. You belong with me, and we deserve a life together. There is nothing I'm more sure of in the world.”

I force a smile, trying to show him that I'm optimistic for this whole thing. But I'm not. There's something niggling in the back of my mind, telling me that this is a bad idea. I feel that there's going to be a horrible mistake waiting in the world of the real. What that is, I don't know.

But I guess I'm going to find out.

“Yeah,” I eventually say. “Together. I like that.”

He beams at me and my heart melts. I will do anything for this man. I lean in and kiss him softly, moaning when he deepens it.

“The things you do to me,” he sighs against my lips. “You have no idea.” He groans and pulls away, pulling me towards the door. “We're ready to take you back now.”

“Can I just have one minute? Just to...say goodbye.”

“Of course.” He gives my hand a little squeeze. “Don't forget your tablets. I left them by the window, okay?” I nod, and he leaves.

I turn back to look at the little room that I've grown to call my own. I think back to all the things that have happened in here. My first meltdown, my first kiss with Glen, our first time together...So many ups and downs, all in this one little room. How can such a small space hold so many different memories?

I walk over to the window, picking up the small vial of tablets. I look at them, knowing that this is my only chance of living a normal life. This is a way of life now. This is me.

“Hey Dan! Move your arse! We need to get going!”

I come a decision. I take a deep breath, turn around and walk out of my safe little haven. Leaving behind all the memories. All the comforts. All the nightmares and the meltdowns...

And my bottle of medication stays rested by the window.

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A/N - Hello! Well...I'm not really sure how to describe this chapter. So, I'm just going to let you guys come to your own conclusions for it! I'm only going to be uploading one chapter a night from now on, as it's coming to the end...there's still a few chapters left but you know. Over 10 at least. And I need more time to write the third Emie/Glen story. So yeah. Imma stop talking now! Vote, comment, do your thing. Much love x