Dear Diary,
Today I woke up and saw corn juice on my bed. I realized I had gotten high off of corn juice last night.
I opened my front door and saw a lock of Rad Homo's hair and Patrick Tree's hand in a plastic bag on the doormat.
I took the hand and threw it across the room at my framed picture of corn. "Stupid Pafrick Stump!" I shouted.
Just then, Plank Oreo broke through the window like the god damn lemur he is. "BRYAR BOB I NEED YOUR HELP! GERARD HAS BEEN CAPTURED BY BERT MCQUACKIN!"
We flew out of the house through the door like civilized people and rushed to Bert. He had Gerard in chains. He snickered, "Gerard is mine you moist fart!"
"Don't call me a moist fart!" I shouted at him, kicking him in his flabby man boob. Yank Oreo fled to Gerard and they made out right in front of me. I slapped both of them and told them no homo and then flew off. I then pulled corn out of my ear.
"CORN OUT OF THE BOB!"
YOU ARE READING
i am bryar bob ➸ b.b
Fanfictioncorn child (this is a crack fic. read it if you want to laugh a lot.) (this is a collab with @doodlingdeath, go follow her.)
