Band-Aids On Bruises

Failure

I chased after Dustin, calling for him to stop.

The moment I saw him run from me, tears covering his face, I pushed that girl off me. I shoved everybody out of my way, yet he seemed to have just disappeared.

I now stood in the living room, frantically looking left and right for any sign of him, a pink shirt, flower crown, anything.

But there was nothing.

My head was spinning and I found it hard to remember what I was doing, what I had done, or how I had gotten here. The party was so loud and distracting, that I found myself being drawn back into it as if it were telling me to forget about Dustin and just have a good time.

I smacked myself. Hard. I needed to think, to remember.

I  quickly searched for someplace quiet, and saw the front door. I tried my hardest to walk to the front door in a straight line and without crashing into anyone or anything.

When I finally made my way outside, cold air smacked me in the face. I looked around the front yard and saw nobody there, so I wandered over to the curb and decided to sit there and think.

The cold breeze pushed against me as I tried to gather my memories. What had I been doing all night? Why?

Then the truth hit me like a train.

The memories started flooding into my mind, more and more, and I felt disgusted with myself and all the things I had done. I had failed Dustin. I told him I'd be there, and I wasn't.

I need to start from the beginning.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Flashback~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After Tyler had given me those drinks, I had jumped into the middle of the large dancing crowd, and danced like I'd die if I stopped. People kept giving me more and more drinks, and I chugged them at their demand. The more drunk I got, the stupider I got.

At one point, a blonde haired girl slid up next to me and began to dance with me. I wasn't even interested in her, yet I let her keep rubbing herself all over me. I should have pushed her away, but I didn't.

We danced like that for a long time, her hands roaming all over me, and at one point I wrapped my arm around her waist as if she were my girl-friend or something. Then something clicked in my brain, telling me that she was most likely drunk and so was I, and I stopped paying attention to her.

It was a really cruel thing to do, but it seemed like a good idea at the time. She didn't take the hint though, so I looked around, another girl looking at me caught my eye. She wasn't very pretty, but she would do the trick.

I made a motion for her to come over, and she did. I put my hands on her hips, and she put hers on my shoulders.

The blonde saw me, and was appalled. She called me something along the lines of 'whore' then slapped me. The other, just seemed happy that I had chosen her.

Giggling, she pulled me over to a less crowed spot. We slow danced for a bit, then she tried to kiss me on the lips. But I stopped her.

She was annoyed, then her annoyance went to rage when I just shrugged and slipped out of her grasp and into the crowd. I heard her curse and yell at me.

I made my way into the basement to avoid those females. I then bumped into another girl. She looked me up and down, smiled, then handed me the one of the drinks she was holding.