A Different Reality (Lasting Love)

This is Exciting

"What do I do?  How do I tell Justin?" I sit in my dressing room across from Lisa crying "We JUST agreed that we wanted to wait a little."

"You just tell him, Jen."  She moves closer to me, comforting me with a much needed hug "Ask him to go out for dinner tonight, or make something for him at home.  You know he's going to be excited no matter how you tell him.  He's wanted this for a few years now."

"But what if he doesn't anymore?" I think back to the conversation we had on this very topic last week. "I finally got him to agree on waiting a year.  What if he already made plans and this ruins them?"

"You know that's not how he is going to think when you tell him." She takes a few seconds, thinking as she carefully studies my facial expressions "Do you want this, Jen?  Are you more worried about how you're going to react once it all sinks in?"

"What?" I fill with disbelief "Of course I do.  I just-" I try to pull myself together "I just don't know that I'm ready.  I mean, I only 23 and there's so much more to do in life."

"You guys are ready." Looking me right in the eyes, she reassures me "You're going to make the most amazing parents to this incredibly lucky baby.  Everything that you wanted to do with Justin can also be done with the child that you guys created.  There's nothing more special than that."

She leaves a few minutes later, and I take some time to think about everything.  Justin has always wanted a baby.  He's made it clear since we started dating, and even though I always have too, I've worried about how it would impact my career.  Now that I know we're ready, and already love this baby more than myself, I couldn't be more excited for what's about to happen.  I know Justin is going to be extatic as well, I just wish that the timing was better, and not right after a fight we had about wanting to wait a little.  What if he thinks I've known for a while and I was testing him before?

After thinking about it for a while, I decide the best way to tell him is over dinner.  I want it private, so I'm going to make it myself at our house.  I'll pick up from wine for him, and some grape juice that I can drink so he doesn't suspect anything, and when we're done I'll tell him.  First, I have to go to my doctors appointment.

"Theroux?" The nurse calls out.  I get up and follow her into an exam room.  She hands me a gown and asks me to change, then hands me a cup for a urine sample.  I do everything as I'm told, and sit on the exam table waiting for the doctor.

"Hi, Jennifer!" She walks in cheerfully and shakes my hand "I'm Dr. Miller."

She goes on to ask me some questions about my lifestyle and health.  After I feel like I've been quizzed on everything, she finally starts the exam.  She has me lay down and relax, before rolling a screen closer and sticking a probe inside me to get pictures.  I try to stay as relaxed and comfortable as I can.

"Right there," She points out a little peanut shape on the screen "Is baby Theroux!"

I watch the screen in amazement as I see our child literally hanging out inside of me. 

"Everything looks great!" The doctor looks at some things on the screen for specifications "Based on this and what you told me before, it looks like you're about a month along."

"Wow," I think out loud to myself "I thought it was gonna be like a week or something.  That's awesome."

"Congratulations!" She looks at me smiling as she hands me a picture.  I wait for her to finish the exam before sitting back up on the table and pulling myself together.  She tells me when to schedule my next appointment, and I do that before leaving to go home.

I go right to the store to pick up everything that I need to make dinner.  Justin will be home in an hour, so I need to make everything quickly.  As soon as I get home, I put the picture on the side of the fridge where Justin won't see it, and start cooking.

An hour later, the house smells amazing, I have the whole table set with our glasses and his wine out, and dinner is on the counter waiting to be served.

"Hey," Justin walks over to kiss me as he walks in the house "This smells amazing.  Did I miss something?"

"No," I look up to kiss him back "I just wanted to do something nice and surprise you.  We've been busy lately so I thought this would be nice."

"Okay." He puts his work stuff away and comes back downstairs joining me at the table.

"So how was work?" I ask, trying to be as normal as possible and not give away the surprise "Did you write alot?"

"We just did some editing today.  Most of the writing is done." He looks at me, studying my face for a while "You okay?  You look tired."

"I'm fine.  Just had alot to do today with work and my doctors appointment and the store." I go on not even realizing what I said "I'll just go to bed early tonight."

"Doctors appointment?" He asks, causing me to replay what I just said in my head.

"Oh yeah, just the yearly one." I reply quickly "They said I'm very healthy, so that's good."

"Yeah," He responds, not really buying what I said.  I stay quiet for a little, not wanting to give anything else away by accident.  He talks for a while about what's going on with his latest movie, and the time line for everything while I listen carefully.

"Here, you want more?" He holds the wine bottle up after filling his glass again.  I shake my head no, knowing that I can't drink any.

"Are you sure you're okay, Jen?"  He sets it down "This is your favorite.  You never say no."

"I'm fine," I get up to grab the picture from the fridge, and the dessert I made "I'm just not in the mood for much wine tonight."

"You're hiding something." He replies shocking me "What is it?  Why are you acting like this?"

I turn so he can't see me, starting to cry a little.  I think again about what will happen if he decides he doesn't want a baby right now as I stare at the picture in front of me.

"Are you crying?" He surprises me by walking over and wrapping his arms around me. 

I try to hide the picture, but fail and he sees it.

"What is this?" He looks at it confused "It says your name... and has an arrow pointing towards something." He brings it closer to his face, studying it in more detail before lowering it and looking at me in shock.

"Are you pregnant?"

"Yes." I watch his face fill with happiness and joy "About a month."

"That's amazing!" He brings me closer for a hug "We're gonna have a baby!"

"I know!" I feel relief rush over me "A baby."