Demons~ Muke

Far away

The tugged at my head, pulling it back and forth. They shon something really bright in my eyes after prizing my eyelids open. Muffled voices and blurred figures this time but I could still make out Luke/the shadow. They worked as a team to drag me up onto the stretcher, it must of been hard, I'm pretty heavy. They slotted me into the back of the ambulance, the harsh intensity of the lights compared to outside nearly blinded me. I heard them say that I wet myself. Fuck that's embarrassing, I couldn't help it though. They cut some of my clothes off and dressed me in a sanitised hospital robe. Luke rode in the ambulance with me, I think I heard him speaking to Calum. He sounded worried, he probably read the note. I hoped Calum wouldn't come and see me because I know how upset he'd get. When the ambulance arrived at the hospital all the paramedics were rushing around me, Luke kept his hand on mine at all times. It was nice.
I had to have my stomach pumped twice, it felt disgusting. I never wanted them to rescue me. I was on a drip too, crossed wires all over me, needles piercing my skin everywhere. The harsh, white glow of light smacked me in the face, engulfing my vision. And that was it, it felt like I was gone, I couldn't see, feel or hear anything. Just emptiness surrounding me. I could hear things, sometimes see things but my body was temporarily frozen, I'd lost control. I never liked not being in control, this was hell. To them I appeared to simply be a brain dead cabbage, no thoughts or feelings. They talked to me for hours on end, each performing their own little monologue by the side of my bed. Even my dad was there some days. I longed to just talk back to them, just say 'I'm okay don't worry about me.' Because I knew that deep down they all thought that they were to blame.
Maybe they were right.