a day in the life of Adele

Chapter 33

February 14, 2010

My soon-to-be ex had decided to take me out for dinner for Valentine's Day. It was the most caring thing he had done in a while, but I chose to ignore that.

We had been together for almost a year now, and I could already feel the end coming. Things that didn't usually bother me were suddenly bothering me now.

As we were holding hands and walking to my apartment, his phone rang.

"I'm out with Adele, I can't talk right now. Maybe later?" He answered, sounding disappointed that he couldn't talk to them until I was gone.

"Who was that?" I ask when he hangs up.

"Just a girl from work." He said nonchalantly, as if it meant nothing. I had a gut feeling it meant something, but just like I've been doing for the past week, I push the feeling away.

I don't know why I'm still in love with him. I guess the happiness he brought me was greater than the annoyance he brought me. Maybe I'm growing and changing into a person that isn't right for him. I'm probably not in love with him anymore but I just can't admit it.

And I can't seem to let him go, no matter how much we were both falling out of love.

I shove away my confusion, looking up into his face and trying to convince myself we would get through this spell. He noticed me staring and turned his own head to kiss me. It didn't last long at all.

We were passing the bridal store that brides to be were walking in and out of. It kind of broke my heart. I wanted to be them but it felt so far away and unrealistic.

"Do you think that that will be me soon?" I asked shyly. A part of me knew the answer. It was going to be a long time before that would be me. But the other part thought that maybe there was still a chance.

He doesn't answer, he just looks straight ahead. I know he heard me.

Something in me decides to fight. I'm getting tired of ignoring his cruelty.

"Is there a reason you're ignoring me?" I say as we walk up the stairs.

"No, I just don't have an answer." He says flatly.

"Then tell me that, don't just ignore me."

"Why are you being so sensitive? Grow up, Adele. You've been annoying me this entire week!" I unlock the door and step into the place him and I had shared so many memories in.

I storm in, waiting for him to shut the door so I can explode.

"I've been annoying you?! ME?!? You've been ignoring half of my questions, you avoid talking about the fact that you've been distant, you refuse to talk to me when I want to talk things out, and you're constantly on your phone! I don't want to hear this nonsense that I've been annoying you when you've just been a complete child!"

He stands there and says, "Are you done now?"

I throw a box of tissues at him and run off to my room, slamming the door behind me.

Through tears, I ask myself why I fell in love with him in the first place. I break down, finally accepting the fact that we were no longer in love at all. We had to break up. It was for the best. I would never be those girls in the wedding dresses if I didn't start searching for the right person.

We broke up a week later, and it took me over a year to finally move on.

+

Tomorrow. The wedding is tomorrow.

I am finally going to be one of those girls that I saw many years ago.

Although I am still nervous, I'm massively excited and happy.

Simon has been excited since the moment I screamed "Yes!" and nearly knocked him over on the beach.

Angelo hugs me tight as I put him to bed. "How many more days, mummy?" He says with a thrilled expression.

"One more, peanut! Mummy and daddy get married tomorrow and you're going to bring us the rings!"

He knew he had a very special job and he was very serious and proud about it.

"Yes I am!" He says excitedly as he jumps up and down.

It feels like just yesterday I told him there were 45 more days. And before I know it, Simon and I will be celebrating our first anniversary.

I kiss Angelo goodnight, tell him how much I love him and turn out the light.

"I love you too mummy." He whispers as he closes his eyes.

Simon opens our bedroom door just as I'm about to walk in and says, "Miss Adkins, are you going to miss your last name?"

"Not at all." I say with a laugh as I kiss his big lips.

"I'm so sorry that I can't be your boyfriend anymore." He jokes, clearly in a good mood.

"I know, it's quite tragic." I say with a smile as I wash my face.

I was beginning to get emotional already. I wouldn't be Simon's girlfriend ever again.  It was nothing short of bittersweet.

Beginning to cry and then starting to sob, Simon's good mood becomes a mood of concern and he rushes over to the sink.

I feel his strong arms wrap around me and his warm embrace comforts me.

"I'm just so happy, Simon. I never thought I would make it this far." I sob into his shoulder.

"How could you ever think that? You're the most beautiful woman inside and out. It's an absolute honor to be able to marry you."

"I'm the one who's honored. I can't thank you enough for loving me and saving me and-" I say, then stop to cry more.

He rubs my back and lets me cry into him. I've never felt more comforted in my life.

"I love you so much, Simon. I love you so, so much."

"I love you too, baby. More than you could ever imagine."

He wipes the tears from my face, kisses me, and gives me a hug. I stop crying and then I see the mark I left on his shirt.

"Oops, I'm sorry. There's a bit of tears and snot right there." I tell him, pointing to the dark spot on his blue shirt.

We both let out a laugh and climb into bed.

Just like every other night, he wraps his arm around me and I place my hand on top of his own.

We drift off into peaceful sleep, for the last time as boyfriend and girlfriend.