So You're Leaving?

back in Tulsa

Dally sat up in bed, gasping for air. He was drenched in sweat and shaking. The same dream that he'd had on the train... but more intense. He ran his hand through his hair and tried to calm down. This is ridiculous, he told himself. But he was fighting a battle within. On the one side, he thought this was just crazy. He needed to get some decent sleep and he'd be fine. But another side of him was asking... what if? What if these dreams meant something? What if Johnny was in trouble? He shook his head trying to stop the pessimistic thoughts. For crying out loud, Dallas, he scolded himself. There's a party going on downstairs and you're falling asleep at 11:00 at night! Since he returned from Virginia, he'd had a hard time going back to his old routine. He'd gotten used to going to bed early and getting up early. So used to it in fact that he'd actually picked up a job at the race track. No one knew about it, but he was up at the crack of dawn every day, mucking out stalls and taking care of some of the horses. It kept him busy, kept his mind off things. But it also made it impossible for him to stay up all night the way he used to. He couldn't believe that he actually had a job now, but he figured he could use the money. If he ever went back to visit Johnny, no way was Will paying his way again. It was really weird. He had thought he would be glad to be back in Tulsa. Glad to have something to do at night instead of just go to bed. When he first got back, he had tried to just fall back into his old ways -the drinking, the miriad of trampy girls he had at his disposal, the parties, the fighting... everything was just like it was before... except it didn't feel like it did before. Suddenly Buck's place just looked old and dirty to him. So did the girls. And the parties... he didn't even really know anyone at these parties and the people he did were usually too drunk to have any interaction with. He couldn't even sleep when he first got home. The bed was too lumpy, there was too much noise downstairs and he couldn't get a cool breeze to come through his window to save his life. And he was...lonely. He hated to admit it but it was true. For a week, for one lousy week, he'd sort of felt like he had a real family. Not that he didn't consider the gang his true family, but he'd gotten a taste of what it was like to live a normal life for a 17 year old kid. Granted, it was a fleeting glimpse and he knew very well a week was no amount of time to really judge a situation like that, but he'd felt something he'd never felt before. He had felt just the faintest hint of contentment. And he missed it. When he finally was able to fall asleep in his lumpy bed and his breezless room, that was when the dreams had started. And they were getting worse. He couldn't get through a night without waking up. He of course had let on to no one that he was having difficulty re-adjusting to life in Tulsa. He'd returned home, tried to help settle things with the Curtis brothers, and he'd kept a close eye on Ponyboy, making sure he was shaping up. He'd gone to Ponyboy's track meet a few days after getting back, just as he'd promised way back in October when he left for Virginia. Pony seemed to appreciate that he had come. Things seemed better between the Curtis brothers with the exception of Soda. Something had happened between him and Sandy that no one talked about. From what Dally had been able to piece together, it sounded like she was going to be "going away for awhile". It was pretty clear what that meant and he tried not to bring it up. In some ways he figured the situation with Sandy was helping to ease the situation between Darry and Ponyboy. They seemed to be focusing more on helping Soda now than on antagonizing eachother. At any rate, weeks had passed and things seemed fairly under control. But Dally remained tensed, as though ready for something to happen. He hadn't told anyone about the secret he had learned in Virginia. He figured it was only fair that Johnny hear about it first before anymore of the gang knew. He wondered everyday if Grandma Cade had told him yet. He knew she would give Johnny a little more time to settle back into his new life after Dally left, but maybe it had been enough time. Maybe she had decided to tell him already. Dally decided he'd ask to speak to her the next time Johnny called. As he lay awake, he could hear the party still in full swing downstairs. He thought about going down to get a beer and hunt some action, but his eyelids were heavy. Don't fall asleep, he kept telling himself. He knew if he did the dreams would start again. But he'd been up early, working in the stables and he couldn't fight the exhaustion for long. When he opened his eyes again, the room was quiet. Deathly quiet. And dark. Unusual for Buck's. When it was dark, it was loud. there was always something going on. Dally lying down facing the wall. He propped himself up on one arm, listening to the silence, an eerie feeling creeping across his skin. He heard breathing. His stomach turned to ice as he spun around. What he saw made him suck in his breath and back up into the corner. Christopher was standing beside his bed. "Go back," the image whispered. "Go back. NOW!"