To Share You (manxman)

Chapter 15

There is this giddy excitement bubbling in my belly when Zach and I run to uni. He's decided that accompanying me is the right thing to do. In reality, he wants to scope out the situation properly and is probably just a teeny bit overprotective of me.

Although my excitement has been barely containable all morning, we still decide to take a quick detour for no other reason than to spend some time running in our wolf forms. This is another little ritual I miss. The two of us would go nowhere in any other way than in wolf form and I haven't really embraced that at all since moving here.

By the time we're dressed again and ready for my lecture, which I still wonder why he even bothers to attend, we're still a good 30 minutes early.

However, it just seems to be my luck that Raph is just as early.

I feel an immediate urge to hug him the moment our eyes meet. He takes a quick step towards me as if thinking the same, but both of us halt mid-movement as we realise where we are.

There won't be any touching of that sort in university, not now, not ever. My whole stance completely deflates at that thought.

I feel Zach patting my back reassuringly, then moving past me. He walks up to Raph and gives him a friendly man hug, cheekily winking at me while doing so. Then it clicks. Sometimes, that boy is a genius. Good thing he didn't listen to me and actually came here.

I try to walk at a normal speed when I go towards Raph and to my embarrassment, it's way too hard to do so. But when I actually grasp his hand in a completely cliche bro-handshake and pull him into a hug that hopefully looks more like man-hug than a real one, I feel slightly better.

I know we cling to each other too long when I hear Zach clear his throat.

There's no one around, but we let go anyway. No chances.

'Hi' I whisper.

'Good morning' he gives me the most honest smile I've ever seen on him and my heart immediately stops for a beat. I try to tell myself that this is normal, but it really isn't. My reaction to him and just about every movement he makes or word he says is too exaggerated to be normal.

We're both aware that we stand way too close, but neither of use dares to move. If I can't touch him, I at least want to feel him close to me.

'Well, you must be the rumoured mate, then!' Zach's booming voice immediately has me take a step back and look away from Raph's eyes. I don't know where to look now, so my eyes move about frantically.

'You are?' Sheila's confused voice sounds from behind me and I don't dare turn around. This is real now. The fear that she already knows is lodged deep in my belly, where just moments before I could still feel the immense excitement to see Raph.

Raph clears his throat and walks towards Sheila, probably to clear up the situation. When he passes me, his hand slightly touches mine and I hear a low whisper: 'It'll be alright'

I only fairly register the following conversation. I've got a smile on my face, but I doubt it's convincing. I know Zach is trying to salvage whatever of this moment is salvageable by telling Sheila how he kept me awake all night to exchange stores and how I'm tired because of it. I hear myself introducing Zach again, as Raph has already done that and I hear some snippets of conversation about a double date, which again throws me in the midst of confusion and fear.

Sheila eventually leaves, saying she only stopped by to say hi since her work starts later today.

By the time she's gone, the courtyard is filled with moody students and we're far from being alone.