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bet u didn't see this cum-coming
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7:33 pm

Calling Coupoop...

Call Connected

"-uuuuhhh..."

"Um."

"Uuuuuuhhhhhh..."

"Putangina. Scoups, what the hell are you doing?"

"Saglit-uhhh-lang."

". . ."

"A-ano kasi... Shit-uhhhh..."

"Well, whatever that is, it sounds awfully disgusting and-I don't even wanna think about it. Ambaboy mo. Tangina. How to unhear that."

"W-wait malapit n-uhh fuck."

"I'm gonna call 911."

"HOY WALA AKONG GINAGA-UUUHHH-MASAMA!"

"ANONG WALA?! Umamin ka nga. ARE YOU ACTUALLY MASTURBATING RIGHT NOW?!"

"WAIT HI-UHHHHHH~"

"I-I'm gonna call again later. Just...Tapusin mo muna 'yang kung ano mang g-ginagawa mo."

"Sagli-"

Call Ended

"Tumatae kasi ako! Putek-uhhhhh. Why did I even eat that spoiled bread-UGGGHHHH~"

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