prism [ kim s.j ] ( fin )

† 57

     white was replaced with a nice shade of green — light green, nearly lime.

     squeaking metal furniture, clear groans, transparent vines for her dextrose.

     eyes opened, her head spun, starry green swirls, her chest burns, pricks. she sat up anyway, heaving breaths. in, out, in.

     pelting rain splattered on the large windowsill, her toes reaching for the floor. hands shook, knuckles paled, thin twigs for arms.

     "hello uncle," she struggled to open the window, the wires preventing her to do so. "come in, it's raining outside."

     kyu cupped the beautiful blue butterfly on her shaky hands. she wonders why something so pretty would trust her hands — she decided to take care of it, like how uncle jaeyeol did.

     "ah kyu!" jin startled, coffee nearly jumping to his skin. he trudged to her standing figure— did she cower? — and carried her back to her bed. hard and uncomfortable. he clicked the window shut.

     "what's this?" he chuckled. it sounded weird, laughing at a hospital room. "oh, that's really pretty."

     she nodded, grinned, but she stopped, straight lips. why go back to the way it was before? why go back to being blind lovey dovey when they'll never make love? they won't hold hands together in public, or kiss under mistletoes, or say that they're taken.

     it felt like days past, but it felt like her back was still sitting on that hard wooden chair at the back of the class with his crouched back and bored face staring at the sky being painted with white and grey. how two words — "class dismissed." — made a messy orchestra of scrapes, zips, chit chat and rude yawns.

     "hey," then his face popped up, and god forbid how it still looks so sexy. with his beautiful worried eyes and his fucking perfect nose and his frowned lips that smells like strong coffee and toothpaste. with his tousled, greasy hair and eye bags and his skin looking a bit tired, tad bit greying — how he still looks so fucking perfect and how she's ruining him, like how she ruined uncle jaeyeol and ma and pa. she ruins everyone. "do you want anything? just tell me, okay?"

     she nod. just nod.

     kyu felt the tickle on her hands. the butterfly fluttered, but couldn't go up.

     "jin?"

     "yeah?" he stopped in his tracks, her voice making his knees weak. he had to sit down at the foot of her bed. "do you need anything?"

     she stretched out her hand, the butterfly wandering around it. kyu was scared that she might ruin it too. it's better to give it to someone who can take care of it better than she can.

     "please take care of it, jin."

     "okay."

• • •

suga's mixtape y'all – slayed me at school .-.

and a comeback tomorrow – i haven't gotten over monster and lucky one yet ...