Cold

Chapter 20: Surrender

CHAPTER 20: Surrender

 Few minutes ago after Kieran and Alice left Friz in his room.

I feel so bad, I thought.

Alice shut the door after she came and fetched Kieran. I wasn’t able to hear what she said or know what was going on outside. My mind told me not to care.

I was sitting slouchingly in my bed, pulsing and feeling guilty on light hysteria that I purposely did. Maybe it was the right thing… The drunkenness helped me to release my pain. The madness inside me was gone. I felt bad on what I showed to Kieran and Benji. They probably were thinking that I was mad at them. However, I still couldn’t believe that they kept those secrets from me.

I gazed at the window, asking myself, why can’t I move on?

At this moment, I wished Crystal could hear me and I would ask her, why can’t we be together? I wasn’t the one who left her that time. She told me to leave her. It was different. I had to be mad at her to forget her but I was wrong. My relationship with Jane was terrible, realizing what Benji told me, what’s the big deal?

I had been wanting and wishing for the time would come that I could see her again. That was the real me. I had been so cold for the rest of my life until this time. I felt nobody around me would understand, especially those people who hated Crystal. Kieran and Benji should’ve told me… they must have been secretly seeing Crystal and I wished they had brought me with them if it’s true.

Literally, I felt so cold, having a fever. I had never been any better right after I saw another falling dried oak leaf. I remembered Snow and thought that I must meet her before the autumn ends.  

One thing I had considered, taking this opportunity to walk away. Determination increased, took a cool shower in my private comfort room to drizzle off my temperature. I wore a fine leather coat, white undershirt and woolen black jeans. I was having a feeling of contentment while facing the mirror, fixing my casual, short and wavy hair.

After a while, I grabbed Snow’s letter then walked out slowly went downstairs.

Suddenly, I heard Jane screamed, stopping me when I was about to head outside the front door, Jane? Her voice tilted my head up, worried. I got to take this chance to escape, I was thinking that Kieran would prohibit me to go to the city alone.

It was 5:30 in the morning and less people were awake to stroll in the street. Except at the bakery that had opened four in the morning, hoping nobody would notice me. Nevertheless, I climbed up to my old car and drove off.

A sudden freedom I had felt and it was very odd. Nothing could stop me from going. I had to meet my sister and stop her from threatening other people’s lives. She may be powerful and dominant but as his big brother, I knew we could work things out.

It had been 2 hours until I reached the zone stated at the back of the letter. I parked the car at the side street. The crowd was heavy at this hour as usual.

Shortly, I wandered my eyes around, looking at the two to four storey buildings, bricked and a number of them were painted with color peach and white.  I had never been to this zone, seeing a wide roundabout north ahead from my car, with a big Elven monument in the middle, surrounded by a colorful garden with impressive magic-themed— witch hazels along the circular, black steel fence, then bluebells and clovers bedded the round plots with overly designed fairy hedges scattered around.