Broken ( Harry Styles Fanfic)

Chapter 6

Chapter 6

“Nicky,” I heard my father call, “Nicollette wake up. Today is the day.”

I opened my eyes to find my father dressed up in a black tux. For a minute I thought that everything was all a nightmare and that my mother wasn't really dead, but as I opened my eyes and watched my father's sad expression I knew that it was no nightmare.

“You are going to be late to your mother's funeral honey. You have to get up and get dressed.”

“I don't think I can do this dad,” I said.

I sat up and he took me in his arms giving me a hug, “Yes you can Nicky. You have to say goodbye.”

I nodded holding back the tears and he kissed my cheek leaving me alone.

I looked over at the closet where my father's wife, Martha, had hung up a black lace dress for me to wear to the funeral. Martha has always been nice to me and I am glad that my father is happy with her, but now that my mother isn't here I feel guilty for actually liking Martha.

I took a deep breathe and walked over to the dress. I slowly began to get dress not wanting to go to this dreadful funeral. I wasn't ready. I didn't want to say goodbye to her. I couldn't.

I looked at myself in the mirror. I wasn't wearing any makeup and my blonde hair flowed down reminding me of my mother. I pulled it up into a pony tail not wanting to even look at it.

“Nicollette,” Martha lightly knocked on the door to my new room.

I was living in my father's house since that house only reminded me of the horrors of that night. The image of my mother's lifeless body was still fresh in my mind and I didn't want to go back to that house. I felt alone and empty with out her there with me. My father asked me to live with him and I couldn't say no. I was afraid to be alone.

“Yes,” I said lightly in a monotone.

“We are waiting in the car. Whenever you are ready,” she said.

“I'll be right down,” I said.

I could hear the click of her heals as she walked away. I took in a deep breathe then walked over to the night stand where the heart shaped paper airplane my mother gave me laid. I took it in my hand and put it around my neck. I pat down my dress smoothing it out, then walked out of the room.

As we got to cemetery I had completely forgotten about my fear. I have always been afraid of cemeteries and the dead, but after holding my mother's lifeless body in my arms; it was like the fear just went away. All I was afraid of now was losing the people I love. My father was the only one I had left and I didn't want to lose him too.

Friends and family gathered around my mother's grave to say goodbye to her. I wasn't paying attention to who came and who didn't. I was just staring down at the hole in the ground where they will be laying my mother to rest.

It was funny how live our whole lives loving, fighting, crying and caring, when at the end we will be buried in a dark hole to rot. There was no point in getting close to someone when at the end they will end up leaving you or dying. My father left us and my mother is dead. There was no point in going through my life getting close to friends and family when at the end they will leave. The less emotions you put into any type of relationship, then the less anger and pain you will feel. This was it. This was the last time I ever cared for someone.

“Alright if anyone would want anything to be buried with her please step forward and place it on the casket.” The priest said. I am still not sure why even got a priest I don't remember my mother ever attending church.