Capturing Them

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Seventeen
Sang

Speaking around them is becoming too easy, even when my belly twists and turns with nerves. I hadn't realised I was looking at my hands until a large one lays over mine, stopping me from fiddling with my nails. I look up and I'm immediately met with a pair of happy green eyes. "Sweetheart, do you mind telling me how you've come to that conclusion?"

My eyes look beyond him to North and Mr Blackbourne. North's emotions are clear as day on his face; wonder, excitement, curiosity and something else, something I can't place. Mr Blackbourne's face is completely blank but looking into those steel grey eyes, I can see a hint of pride within their steel depths. Is he proud of me? For speaking? I shake my head at the thought. Of course he isn't.

A hand pressing between my shoulder blades had me flinching and I turn my head, looking at Luke who has a soft smile upon his handsome face. My heart stutters at the sight.

Looking back towards the good doctor, I part my lips and lick them, giving them some moisture. I drop my eyes when I find that his eyes dropped and followed the small movement. My eyes find his hand wrapped around mine. A part of me desperately wants to turn my hand over and press my palm against his, but I don't have the confidence to do that. And he's my teacher. Something I need to keep reminding myself off.

"Miss Sang?" My eyes fly up and once more I'm looking at those eyes. "Can you tell me...with your voice?"

Can I? I've already spoken more than I want to. Although, speaking to Luke was as easy as breathing. Speaking to them when we first came into this office was easier than that. They're knocking down my walls, I know that they are and I have to prevent it. But then by me not voicing what I had minutes ago, I could be putting them in danger. At least by telling Mr Blackbourne and Dr Green they can look more into it, find out what Friday Fall is.

I swallow, part my lips and let more words leave my lips. Dr Green's eyes don't leave mine as I tell him what happened, what was said. Luke gently massages my back, keeping me relaxed even with the heavy weight of two other sets of eyes on me. They all listen intently, not once interrupting. When I'm done, I press my lips together. Removing my hands from under Dr Green's where he has left them the whole time, I stand up and pick up my bag.

"Where are you going, Sang Baby?" North asks as Dr Green and Luke raise to their feet also.

"I just..." I pause, shaking my head. "I need space; too much, too soon." My whisper is barely audible as I move towards the door. I need to get out of here and away from them. The thought chips at my heart.

A hand wraps gently around my wrist, bringing me to a halt. A warm large body comes up and stands at my back when I don't turn around. Inhaling deeply, musk invades me and I close my eyes. Warm breath whispers against my ear as a deep voice rumbles, "Please stop running, baby. Let us in."

My eyes open and look at the door in front of me. "It's not as easy as it sounds." I rip my arm free and pull open the door. I don't look back as I walk out of the room, no matter how much my heart screams at me to do so.

I walk down the hall and just as I come to round the corner, a shuffle of bodies do so too, making me come to a halt. I swallow as I take in the five surprised faces, watching me closely. "Hey." Gabriel says and my eyes fly to him, his gaze full of hope. I'm not sure why he would be hopeful for a beat of a second, but when it hits me, I almost stumble back.

He wants me speak.

And a part of me, somewhere in my heart would be so broken if that hope died. The hope that lightens up those baby blue eyes, pushing the shadows of hurt and loss – shadows of the past – away and making those baby blue so much lighter and brighter. "Hi." I whisper softly, hoping that he heard me.

Gabriel sucks in a sharp breath that catches in his throat. My eyes shift to the others; Victor's fire eyes blaze like an inferno, Silas' dark eyes widen, the green in Kota's eyes looks brighter, while Nathan's eyes lose their seriousness and twinkle as his lips curve up into a smile.

Their reactions make the butterflies in my stomach go crazy and the beat of my heart sounds loud in my ears. How can one word, one soft whisper, cause these guys to have such real, sincere reactions when all I've done to them is be rude and push them away.

I blink back the burn of tears and carry on down the hall. Reaching a bathroom, I push open the door so hard the handle smashes into the peach coloured tile, making a loud bang that hurts my ears. Just as I'm about to turn around and lock the door, it's pushed back open again and my eyes widen when they meet awed blue ones.

"Don't fucking run. Stop fucking running. A part of me can't take it any more." He pushes his hand through his hair, the blonde strips blending in with the rest of his darker colour. He closes the door and flips the lock before turning back around to face me. "I fucking care, Sang. We care. About you; a fucking gorgeous girl that doesn't speak and hides what and who she is because she's consumed by grief."

I step back, dropping my book bag to the floor causing a loud thud. I think I'm going to be getting another speech from Gabriel and even though a part of me wants to run like hell; hide behind the one place I feel a sense of peace, my heart and my head want to know what he has to say, so I'm all ears.

"I lost my whole family, Sang. My mom and baby brother died because my father was an alcoholic and he was drunk driving. Then my father remarries, only to kill himself in a car accident while under the influence of alcohol, leaving me with a Step mother that chooses the wrong boyfriend and stays alcohol free for no more than six fucking months before drowning her sorrows at the bottom of a fucking bottle."

A tear slips free from his eye and I itch to wipe it away. Instead, I smack at my own cheek and wipe away my own tears that are easily flowing already.

"I have no blood family left but I survived because of them – Victor, Kota, Nate and Luke. Then I met North, Silas, Doc and Mr B. They chose me to be their friend, a part of their family. They love me even though I can be a whiney fuck. They hate that I'm always taking them shopping, but they fucking deal because it's something I like to do. They encourage me to paint and draw and they stand by me when things get tough."

I don't know what to say, or what to think.

Tears drop from his chin onto the floor. My eyes never leave his agonised, raw, gut-wrenching pained ones. "Now, I'm not expecting you to call us family. But I am asking you to call us a friend because that's what we want to be; a friend, a shoulder, an ear, strength when you feel weak, your greatest supporter. Let us be those things, Sang. Let us be what you need."

"It's not that easy. Not when I've been so alone for so long."

"Then we'll take our time; everything takes time. We're not expecting you to tell us your life story from start to finish, or to speak every time one of us do. I'm just asking you to be in our company, a friend."

I want to, so bad. I just want to be around them, all the time. When I can't see them, I'm thinking about them or looking at their photos like some creeper. They're always there, the first thing I think about when something else isn't occupying my mind. I just want to be in their company but I don't know how to do that without being awkward. "I haven't had a friend in a long time."

"Let me – us – change that then. Please Sang, you can't keep living your life alone."

I close my eyes, letting the final tear slip free as I nod my head. "I can try."

"That's all we need you to do."