Vicino (Solangelo AU)[Completed]

Alive and Breathing and Gone

( A/n: I highly suggest you listen to this song)

What does it feel like to lose someone close to you?

At first, it's almost like you can't believe what you just heard. That this person you know and have grown close to, is suddenly gone. Out of your life. It doesn't seem true. And then you realize that you'll have to go on in life with out them. They're just gone. Forever. And it hurts. Really bad. Trying to cope with the fact that you'll never, speak or see that person ever again, is hard. And all you want to is sit there and cry. You want to cry and sob so hard that if feels like your about to choke up a lung. And then? Well after you're done with the sobbing you just think about all the times you've had with that person. All the laughs. The beautiful memories. And you miss that. So you despair and cry more. Some times you get over it. Some times you don't. Sometimes it gets easier. Sometimes it never gets any better. The whole feeling just feels like you're about to break. And it's horrible. And when you're Nico Di Angelo, the feeling always lingers. It never completely goes away.

How does it feel when you fear that you're about to lose someone that you love?

It feels like you're going to be sick. You just feel completely terrible, and scared out of your mind. You start to think 'what happens when I lose them?' Then what do you do? You'll go through the process. People will tell you to let go. But it's not simple. So when you're sitting there, terrified that you're about to lose someone that you love so much, well you'd sure as hell trade your life for theirs in a heart beat. Crying and despairing is a big part because you dont want to think about when you'll lose them, how it'll happen, what happens after, where they go, what'll happen to you, what'll happen to the other people that loved them. This feeling was slightly foreign to Nico. He'd never known that someone he loved so much could go out if his life just like that. In some way, this feeling was worse than actually losing your loved one. Because now you get to toy with the ideas.

So now Nico and Will were sitting in the car, driving to the hospital. And Nico felt that terrible sick, nauseating feeling. Tears continued to slowly slip out of his eyes. Thinking about losing Hazel, one of the only people he loves anymore, was... Terryfing. And it was unfair. That sweet innocent young girl didn't deserve to die! Why would the fates be so cruel to take her life away from her, and the others around her?

Thinking like this made Nico, sad, angry, upset. He dug his fingernails into the palm of his hand. He hadn't even noticed the imprints of crescent moons on his skin until Will realized it.

"Death Boy, you shouldn't do that." Will said and took one of Nico's hands, forcing him to stop the slight mutilation.

"Sorry." Nico said in a small voice and wiped his tear stained cheeks. He looked at their hands, and then looked out the window again. It was cloudy, and had started to rain. Trickles of water slid down the glass pane and Nico followed it with his eyes. For a split second he almost forgot about his current situation. And then it only came back to him.

Raniy weather. Such a cliché for the current mood. There were things about the gloomy weather that made everything just more depressing. And then there were some peaceful things about rain. Hearing the light tap of it falling on the ground. The neutral gray sky.

A few more minutes of contemplating rain and Nico didn't notice that they lulled up in the Hospital parking lot. "Come one Nico. Let's go see your sister." Willnsqueezed his hand slightly and let go to get out of the car. Nico realized he had to get up, and he did so. Out into the slight rain, they walked to the hospital doors.

The hospital wasn't huge. It want small either. Maybe five floors. They didn't live in a giant city, let alone there were many other hospitals around. So they didn't need giant hospitals.