Dauntless

Part 7

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​​​​​Fuck!
Stupid fucking moronic piece of shit fuckheads!

They couldn’t do this to me, not after all this!
I fucking refused!
“Raagh!” I threw the stupid fucking bowl across the room furiously, barely satisfied when it shattered into thousands of pieces against the stone wall, it’s contents spilling everywhere.
They couldn’t fucking do this!
FUCK!
I wasn’t sitting this out!
It wasn’t fair!
Why did Eric and Four get to go on the mother fucking field trip but I was stuck here babysitting the babies!? Just because I was shot — it didn’t mean I couldn’t fight just as well as they could! 
Fucking idiots!
Storming the factionless was my favorite fucking part of being Dauntless!
I clenched my hands, trying not to break anything else in my apartment. I ran my fingers through my hair, letting them knot and pull against my scalp, trying to reign in my temper.
So! Not! FAIR!
I didn’t wanna babysit!
I doubted I could have been any clearer on the matter to Max! 
I’m sure the look on my face had been priceless when he’d announced we were going to do a sweep of the factionless, make sure they were following the rules, and that I — me — was to stay and train the initiates while Four and Eric got to go have fun! 
I would punch Eric in his smug face!
Four didn’t even like sweeping, so why couldn’t we trade!?
RAGH!
Fuckers!
I wouldn’t forgive them for this! Not ever!
This meant war!
My tantrum was suddenly interrupted, and I turned my furious eyes to my door, intent on ripping someone’s fingers off knuckle by knuckle.
“Who is it!?” I hissed, stalking forward, slinging the door open so hard it bounced against the wall before coming back to my hand. “You!?”
“Me,” Eric grinned down at me, bracing his hands on either side of the door and leaning in. “Just wanted to see how you were this morning before I leave.”
“Fuck you, Eric! We both know you think sweeping the Factionless is below you!” I snarled, my hands going on my hips. “So why the fuck do you get to go!?”
“Because you know the factionless get pissed when we go through and take their contraband. We can’t have an injured soldier on our team slowing us down.”
“Slowing — I wouldn’t slow you down, you Motherfucker! I’m in this condition because of you!” I ranted, throwing my hands angrily into the air. “This is all your fault! You’re doing this on purpose!”
“Don’t get dramatic.” he sounded exasperated. “You know I don’t like it —.”
“Then cop out so I can do it!”
“Camille, you’re shot —.”
“You’re gonna be the ones who’s shot —!” I started, feeling my face flush. I was so mad at him! I almost felt betrayed! He got me shot, made me cover for him — then lied to me — and now he was trying to take away the one thing I enjoyed the most!
What a fucking asshole!
“You’re such a jackass, Eric! You know how much I like —!”
“You should appreciate the fact you’re still Dauntless and not factionless yourself!” he snapped. “Especially when you almost died —.”
“ — because of you —!”
“It wasn’t my fault you —.”
He tried to talk over me, which I absolutely hate, and we ended up yelling at each other instead, our voices just loud and irritated —.
— did he just call me a cunt!?
Fucker!
“You two are so annoying!” a voice suddenly bellowed, and we both stopped, tensing. 
Uh oh.
We looked over, seeing Harrison standing in the hallway, shaking his head. I’d always thought his blonde ponytail was kind of tacky, but that was none of my business. He was in leadership, much higher then me or Eric.
“Harrison —.”
“Shouldn’t you be resting, Camille?”
“No!” I gasped, offended. “Why does everyone keep saying that!?”
He rolled his eyes at me!
​​​ Ugh!
Eric smirked.
“And shouldn’t you be leaving?” Harrison asked Eric, and I was pleased to see that asshole smirk drop from his face. “Now.”
Eric grimaced, giving me another glance before storming off. Harrison chuckled as he disappeared, stepping up to me and motioning me forward. 
“Come on, I’ll walk with you to the recruits. Although, you should be resting — don’t make a face, Camille. I’ve been shot before; you wouldn’t even be walking yet if you weren’t dosing yourself with morphine.”
I rolled my eyes. “I’m fine, Harrison.”
“Of course you are. You know, Eric volunteered for the sweep.” he added casually as we started walking, gazing at me in amusement. 
What!?
“That asshole!” I gasped, pressing my lips tightly together. The fucker had done it on purpose!
“Max was actually going to let you go,” Harrison continued, , as if I’d never spoken. “But they’re sweeping the warehouse district — you know that’s the roughest. It’s probably best you stay here, it was thoughtful of Eric to ask to go in your stead.”
“Oh, yeah, so admirable. I’ll just train the initiates while he gets to go out and —.”
“Risk his life taking contraband from the less fortunate? Get shot at, probably beaten — mobbed, even? Yes, he’s having a great time. Took a wonderful opportunity away from you, someone in such great physical health.”
I frowned at him as we started walking together, heading towards the training grounds. “Your sarcasm isn’t appreciated, Harrison.”
“And yet it’s needed.”
I huffed, averting my eyes from his. 
Dammit, was that right? Had Eric volunteered on purpose to make sure I wouldn’t go because he didn’t want me hurt?
I found that hard to believe, Eric was too selfish of a person and everyone knew it.
So no, he had his own agenda for getting me out of the way; I just hope it didn’t involve killing Four or anything, he was one of the people we needed around here.
“I’ll leave you to your duties,” Harrison said as we entered the training area, the recruits already mulling around, looking sleepy and worn down.
Well not for long.
“I pity your students today,” he chuckled after I bellowed at them, startling them awake and sending them running thirty laps for good measure. “They’re certainly in for a treat today.”
“And why do you say that?”
“Your tantrums preceed you, Camille. And at least you’re taking your anger out on them and not another member of Dauntless; we don’t need another report about you breaking someone’s arm.”
“That was only once!”
“And once too many, remember that. Train the initiates, Camille, don’t kill them.”
Yeah, yeah, whatever.
I wouldn’t kill them, I was just going to work them until they were passing out and puking — maybe even a few fainting.
​​​ Or at least until I was satisfied.
~~~~~
“You’re going to kill us,” Nosey wheezed at me from where he’d run his second round of thirty laps. I could see the sweat on his pale skin, his legs wobbling from the exercise. He had his hands braced against his knees as he sucked in lung fulls of air, as if he was dying. 
“You’re fine,” I scoffed, waving my hand dismissively as my eyes scoured the group for the Stiff. She was already collapsed on the ground with her Candor friend, both of them leaning against each other for support. One of them had thrown up already, and Candor looked ready to pass out at any time.
Good.
“Being Dauntless isn’t just fun and games,” I said after a moment, starting to pace in front of them. “You have to be strong, able to take care of yourself — your stamina cannot be that of a child’s. We are the defenders of this city, the protectors. We value bravery above all else — so if you’re weak, or if this is just too much for you, no one is stopping you from packing your shit and leaving, now are they?”
I was met with silence.
Good.
“We don’t need big babies in Dauntless — we need brave soldiers. Ones that are loyal to Dauntless, to each other — ready to give their very lives defending this city. People die here, it’s not a joyride.” I shook my head. “And sometimes it’s not even the people who deserve it. You may think I’m being harsh, but you’ll appreciate all this hard training when the time comes to use it.”
I was greeted with silence.
Well I hoped all that sunk in.
I saw a collective sigh of relief as the alarm for lunch suddenly went off, everyone rising to wobbly legs or staggering for the door. 
I sighed as I watched them go. Was I being a little too harsh on Eric? Was he actually being a good guy for once ? I felt ridiculous even entertaining the notion.
​The thoughts had been plaguing me all day.​​
“Um, Camille?”
“Hmm?” I turned at the soft voice, my eyes lighting on the Stiff. She was a little shorter then me, her soft eyes worried and surprisingly meeting mine. Her hair was falling from her band, and I could see the sweat on her skin, how heavy her chest was moving. “What is it?”
“I… I was just wondering where the other trainers are.” she mumbled, looking away.
“You mean Four?” I asked in amusement, seeing her flushed skin redden more; she was way too obvious. “He’s in a sweep right now.”
She frowned. “A sweep?”
“It’s where we go through the factionless and take back anything they’re not supposed to have — weapons, armor, things like that.”
“Is it dangerous?”
“Can be,” I shrugged, crossing my arms. “It just depends on where you go.”
“Then where did —?”
“You’re full of questions this morning,” I frowned at her, and she immediately looked away. “Don’t worry about him, he can take care of himself. He’s been doing this a long time. Why don’t you go get some lunch?”
She hesitated, then bobbed her head, keeping her eyes habitually on the ground. Poor Stiff, still falling back into her old ways. 
“Hey,” I quickly stepped to her side, and I tapped her nose lightly with my finger, startling her into looking up. “You’re not in Abnegation anymore, Tris. Look people in the eye, don’t let them think you’re weak. Show some backbone! It’s the only way you’re gonna make it in here, alright?”
She nodded, her eyes on my face.​
Okay, good pep talk.
​And she didn’t have to look so surprised, I could be nice sometimes ​​.
I quickly sent her on her way, almost feeling awkward about being even mildly nice to her. She’d seen me at my worst, shot up and bleeding on the chasm floor, and I didn’t like that.
I sighed as I felt my gut rumble. I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to get something to eat. Although I definitely didn’t feel like going to the cafeteria where people could actually talk to me. All they ever wanted to do was ask about my injuries or what had happened — and I wasn’t in the mood for it today.
A rooftop lunch wouldn’t be too bad.
~~~~~
“So how was the sweep?” I asked Four as he sat down beside me at the dinner table, looking tired and smelling like he’d just stepped out of the shower; going through the factionless areas always made one feel disgusting, all that grime and dust floating about. Everyone generally headed straight for the showers.
“Same as always,” he grunted, lifting his cup to his lips, a new scratch above his eye. I knew how much he hated sweeps, taking things away from the factionless when they might really need it and whatnot. He was generally so adamant against going anywhere near the factionless I was almost surprised they’d managed to convince him to go.
“So dirty and tiring?” I prodded, bumping my shoulder against his; he hated it when people did that. He glared at me, back to his usual loner self, it seemed.
“Ugh, fine, be a grouch. If you didn’t want to sit with me I see an open spot beside a few initiates,” I said lightly, swirling the water in my cup with a smirk. He refused to raise his eyes from his plate, but he knew exactly who I was talking about.
I was never going to let him live this down.
Four had the hots for an initiate. Maybe because she was from Abnegation? I was still trying to figure it out myself.
She looked all boring and plain to me, even if she did have a tattoo now.
I knew Tori didn’t like being around her, for some reason. I’d seen them talking before and Tori looked ready to run under the nearest rock to avoid her.
So what was up with this Stiff that I didn’t know?
Hmm.
I hated being in the dark.
My eyes flicked up as I felt someone’s gaze on me, and I glared immediately at Eric as I saw him standing with Max on the level above us, leaning against the metal catwalk and smirking down at everyone like he owned the city.
Someone should punch him.
I would love to do it.
Alas, I had better things to do. I was tired, dinner was about over, and the initiates had the night off so I didn’t have duty.
I was going to take a long, hot bath, maybe with some bubbles, and soak for two hours. After that, sleep for two days.
That would be nice.
“See ya later, Four.” I muttered, rising to my feet. I sighed, stretching my arms over my head, feeling my side pull and pinch a little at the movement. God, it was like I was never going to get better. I sighed as I moved away from the table, leaving the crowded cafeteria behind and heading for the hallway.
Bubbles…. Hot water…. Bed….
I had a chant.
“Hey, Camille!”
Shit.
I didn’t stop walking, but I did glance behind me to see who the voice belonged too. I frowned as I recognized Nosey, and glared at him as he sidled up to me, keeping my brisk pace.
“Who said you could speak to me?” I snapped at him, turning a sharp corner, hoping he’d leave me alone. Alas, I wasn’t so lucky. He followed me, smirking and reminding me horribly of Eric. 
At least this one I could punch without consequences.
“So, how’s the whole ‘being shot’ thing going? Healing well?” he asked me, his voice annoyingly bright.
Ugghhhh.
“What do you want, initiate?” I demanded, slowing to a stop, frowning at him. I didn’t have time for him but I also didn’t want him knowing where my apartment was.
“I have a name you know. Peter.”
“Like I care. What do you want?” it wasn’t like I would remember his name anyway.
He scowled at me, shifting his weight and getting an attitude. “Yknow, you’re a real bitch. You talk a lot of shit, but you’re really not that tough. Especially right now.”
I stiffened, letting my hands rest by my side. “Is that a threat, initiate?”
“Peter —.”
“I don’t give a fuck what your name is, do you understand me?” I snarled, taking a threatening step towards him, my nail jabbing into that soft chest of his. “You ever say something like that to me again and I’ll cut out your tongue with a pair of rusty scissors — is that clear enough for you!?”
He actually snorted at me. “I’d like to see you try it, Camille.”
Oh you little —.
I didn’t even realized I’d drawn back my fist to punch him until I felt someone’s hand curl around mine, holding on tightly.
The fuck?
“Is there a problem here?” a cool voice asked behind me, their breath warm on my neck. “Peter?”
“N-no, of course not,” Peter stammered, immediately backing off, his hands rising into the air. “We were just talking.”
“And now you’re leaving.” Eric said coldly, his fingers slowly forcing mine to relax, his skin oddly cool against my own. 
​​​I glared at Nosey as he took off down the hall like his ass was on fire. 
“What was that about?” Eric asked as I turned around, frowning up at him as I pulled my hand away from him. 
“None of your fucking business, you asshole.”
“What the fuck —?”
“Leave me alone!” You fucking jerk — moron — hateful —- ughh!
I turned on my heel, stalking towards my apartment. I didn’t need his help! I didn’t need anyone’s help! I was fucking fine, just because I was hurt didn’t mean I was weak or anyone could push me around!
Fucking men!
Useless, arrogant men!
RAGH!
I practically kicked my door open, not getting any satisfaction when it hit the wall and shit clattered to the floor. I made it barely two steps inside before someone’s hand wrapped around my arm. I hissed as I felt the sting of the wound there, where I’d also been shot.
“Fuck, ow!”
“What the hell is your problem?” Eric demanded, and I scowled as he shut my door, flicking on the light switch as he did. 
​I shielded my eyes at the sudden glare.​​
“I don’t have a problem!”
“Don’t bullshit me, I’m done with it. Speak, now.”
“You can’t fucking order me around, Eric!” I snarled, wrenching myself out of his grip, arm stinging. “You fucking lying asshole!”
“You’re still mad about that? That was last week!” he sounded exasperated, as if I was overreacting. I glowered at him, balling my fists.
“I covered for you and you lied to me! That was so shitty and you don’t even care! And then you take away my sweep! You volunteered to go and I know you think it’s below you! So fuck you, you ungrateful, arrogant, self centered piece of shit!” I shrilled, feeling my blood pressure shoot to the roof as my voice echoed through my apartment, my fists clenched so tightly I could feel my nails cutting my palms.
I was so — frustrated! I was fucking hurting, my entire side still felt like it was going to explode, and I was already so sick of people taking the things I liked away from me! Of using me for their own shit and then not repaying the favor! And I hated how everyone kept looking at me like I as some kind of invalid — I wasn’t about to be kicked out, another few months and I’d be in top shape again!
So fuck everyone!
All of them!
I just wanted to scream, I —.
The fuck?
I went rigid as Erics hands abruptly closed around my heated face, his lips forcefully covering mine before I had a chance to react. It took my brain a few seconds to realize he was kissing me, my hips suddenly pressing back against a table, his fingers rough against my skin.
What the hell was he doing!?
And why did he have such soft lips?
I felt his tongue trace my lower lip suggestively, his hand lowering to the curve of my shoulder before my sense suddenly returned to me.
Why was I letting him kiss me!?
I shoved at him, my hands hitting his broad shoulders and sending him back a step, ignoring the fact my heart was suddenly beating with a vengeance.
“What the shit?” I demanded, staring at him like he’d just announced he was joining the factionless. “Have you lost your mind?”
“No, it was the only way you’d shut up,” he answered, his lips curving into a smirk as he looked at me. “I was getting tired of the yelling.”
“So you thought you could kiss me!?”
“I did kiss you. And you didn’t seem to mind.”
“I do mind!”
“No, you think you mind.” he shook his head, smirking down at me like he knew something I didn’t. I glared at him, crossing my arms over my chest defensively. “But really, you let me kiss you because you enjoyed it.”
Well… He wasn’t a bad kisser, no. I wouldn’t deny that.
“It doesn’t change the fact you’re an arrogant prick who doesn’t appreciate —.”
“Woman — I didn’t lie to you about Amateus! I said I shot him, you assumed he died. Not my fault. Why can’t you get over it?”
“Because you — why did you volunteer to go on the sweep?” I demanded, changing the subject before I had to explain anything to him that not even I understood. I Was Just Sort Of Mad At Him In general. “I know Max was going to let me go —.”
“You’re in no condition to go on a sweep of the warehouses. It’s too rough there and you’d only get killed or get someone else killed. So I volunteered to keep you from going, get over it.”
“No, I’m not going too! Don’t take me being shot — which is your fucking fault, by the way! — to your advantage! You’re not going to get ahead of me in leadership or make me look weak —.”
“Goddamn, Camille! You’re the toughest broad here, you got shot a few weeks ago and you’re already on your feet bossing everyone around, no one’s going to think you’re weak.” he said in irritation, glaring down at me. “And you’re the idiot who didn’t just let me fall.”
“I wasn’t going to let you and —.”
“It’s your own fault for getting shot, not mine. You should’ve finished the traitor when you had a chance —.”
“Oh, I’m fucking sorry I let him go so I could save your ungrateful ass,” I spat. “Next time I won’t be so thoughtful!”
Because there would be a next time, there always was.
Eric rolled his eyes, turning away from me and to the door. I glared at his back, hoping he fell down the next flight of stairs he came too. 
“I can feel you thinking hateful shit at me,” he called over his shoulder as he stepped to the door.
“Good, then you know how I feel.”
“You’re an easy person to figure out, Camille. You make sure everyone knows how you feel.” he shook his head. “You’re a pain like that.”
I scoffed, leaning back against the table. 
Yeah fucking right.
“When you get over this bitchy little tantrum you’re throwing, there’s a meeting tonight,” he said, glancing over his shoulder at me. “Max wants you there. It’s going to be important. Can you stop being childish long enough to attend?”
I bristled.
Arrogant, egocentric, fucking —.
“I’ll be there,” I said between my teeth, trying to be as calm as possible. “Now get out of my apartment.”
He huffed at me, and a moment later he slammed the door.
I waited a few moments, then raised a hand to my tingling lips.
Dammit to hell.
​​