Lost

Fourteen

It's been about a week since our little Brockules stopped fighting and it's taken its toll on our family. Poor little Daxton hasn't grasped that Brock isn't coming back, constantly asking us when Brock will return home. No one ever knows how to answer.

Mom and dad are trying their best to keep our family together, but not succeeding very much. They're constantly preoccupied with Willow and Dax, leaving Gavin and I to fend for ourselves most of the time.

I have been finding myself spacing out more and more, thinking about all of the memories I have with Avia and Brock. School is becoming less and less interesting and I can never find myself lasting more than twenty minutes without spacing out.

Gavin, however, is taking it the worst. He and Brock were closer than I thought. Gavin tries to put on a brave face for all of us, but I can tell that's he's hurt. He blames himself for it. Gavin and I have been sleeping together recently, and every night, he cries himself to sleep. He bottles up all of the sadness he's had from the day and let's it out into his pillow. It's not good for him, but it's become a routine.

Gavin and I are in his room together, I've been sleeping on an air mattress next to his bed ever since Brock left. I finally found myself starting to drift off to sleep when I hear the muffled sound of crying. Gavin crying. I get out of my bed and gingerly sit beside him.

"Hey Gav," I whispered to him, "it's alright, everything will be alright."
He looked up at me, his face covered in tears. His eyes were wide with fear, making him look like a lost little boy.
"Em..." He said through his tears, "it's all my fault. It should have been me."
"No it wasn't Gav. Don't think like that," I said, trying to calm him.
He started hyperventilating from all of the cries. I didn't know what to do. I started rubbing his back, whispering words to comfort to him, but nothing seemed to work. I was about to call mom when she opened the door, she must have heard from her room. She came over to the bed and looked at me.
"Em," she said softly, kissing me on the head, "why don't you go up and sleep with daddy. I'll stay here with Gav."
I didn't fight it. As much as I wanted to stay with my brother, I knew that mom would be better at comforting than me. I nodded and made my way out the door, grabbing my stuffed bunny off of the mattress I'd been sleeping on. I gently shut the door behind me and proceeded to go into mom and dad's room.

I clutched my bunny close to me as I walked through the dark, empty house. I carefully opened the bedroom door to reveal the bed, covered in a blanket of darkness. Dad was lying in bed, his phone illuminating his red eyes and tear stained face.

"Daddy," I whispered.
He looked up from his phone and sat up.
"Hey Loofus," he answered softly.
I climbed into mom's spot on the bed and cuddled next to him. He wrapped his arm around me and rested his head atop mine. I was still clutching my bunny. I might be ten, but ever since Avia's death, my bunny has been comforting. It was my baby present from Avia and it reminded me of her every night.

My dad and I talked for a while before falling asleep. We talked about everything and for the first time since I lost my best friend, we spilled our hearts out to each other. I told him about my depression after Avia's death. I told him about the note I found in her room. I told him about her last words that lingered in my head for so long. I told about my life and my concentrating issues. He told me about his and mom's reactions to Avia and Brock's deaths. He told about how much he missed them. He told me things I never though I would hear from him. And after talking and talking, I fell asleep with my arms wrapped around him. Both of our faces were tear stained from the nights conversation, but we didn't mind. This was night I would never forget.

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Author's Note:
So... I'm kinda running out of ideas on what to write. Please leave suggestions in the comments, I would love to hear them!! Also, three updates in one day because I have literally no life. Love you guys! -L