Phan One shots

Fan Meets Phan (a fan's pov)

WARNING: may be triggering to some people it talks about self harm and mental illnesses
Also this is pretty damn weird and unrealistic so just get out if you hate

I walk down the London streets at sunset, not really having a destination. I just like to explore.

My curfew is 10:00 so I have a few hours. I think my dad thinks I like to go to parties and drink alcohol when really i just drink tea from Starbucks and go to playgrounds.

I think sixteen year olds like me are supposed to be a bit more rebellious than me. I don't care. I enjoy myself.

"Oh my fucking god," I whisper. I see Dan and Phil. Their tall bodies walk close to each other as they walk towards a tube stairway. I decide to follow them. I will approach them, I just need to get up the nerve to. I mean, I know the basically whole city so I should be fine getting back.  

Also not to mention it's danisnoton-fucking-fire and Amazing-fucking-Phil!

I walk down the stairs to follow them and pretend I don't obsess and cry over them daily. I'm a normal girl who has no idea who these people are.

I pull my hair up into a ponytail and fix my grey tee over black leggings. They are getting on the train so I get on the same car as them and sit across from them.

I stare at their shoes. They're wearing casual sneakers, Vans or something, and they look amazing. Dan is wearing his moth shirt with black jeans and Phil is wearing his now very common red plaid shirt with black jeans.

They talk to each other pretty quietly but I manage to hear a few words.

"Party... Fans... No we can't... Yeah it's hard... But of course... Yeah..." Are some words and phrases I catch.

I also see Dan mouth something to Phil. Not just something. It's three wonderful words. "I love you." Phil smiles and bites his lip.

I'm pretty fricking sure Dan just mouthed 'I love you' to Phil. Shit. I am leaving the Earth right now. I am going to heaven. (I'm probably actually going to hell.) This is heaven. I am flying and this is fucking heaven.

I hold my gasp and pretend to cough. Phil looks at me and when are eyes meet he smiles politely and looks at the ground. Tears begin to well in my eyes. This is the best day of my life. Tears are streaming down my face. I wipe them away quickly.

Dan and Phil stand up at their stop and I do the same, following them off so they can't see me well.

Their hands swing with each other as they walk. I swear they hook their thumbs together and make eye contact for a second. They let go of each other's thumbs and walk normally. The sun is setting so lots of light still floods the streets. They make a turn at an intersection.

I don't see which direction they turn so run quickly to the curb and look both ways. Left. I turn that way and continue to follow them.

Will I be able to talk to them? Who knows. I hope so.

A few people walk between us so I am not noticeable at all, really.

Dan and Phil turn to a house next to a playground. They knock on the door and are invited in happily. I see lots of people inside. It looks like a party.

I give up, I guess. I go to the park, maybe I'll be able to see them through the window.

Oh my god. I'm such a crazy phannie. I hate myself so much. Why couldn't I just say hi and move on with my life? Why am I so awkward that I can't approach people?

Ugh.

I climb the the top of the play structure and sit to watch the sun go down. The sun sets at about 7:00 pm.