Diary of a Broken Heart

Unexpected Change... (Maybe)

So that happened and no one ever called us a couple since. But something changed and this, I did not expect. Since everyone had the idea that we're just friends, girls started flocking around him- telling him that he's cute, gorgeous, hot, sexy, smexy- what the hell is that, and some other icky stuff and well, our hang outs started becoming less and less. It wasn't really such a big deal back then but when it grew lesser and lesser, I started to miss it. How can you not? You got used to having him around almost everyday then all of a sudden, gone. Would you not feel the same? Of course you would. That's why I'm feeling this. Because I've been used to having him before. Right. That's right. That's my reason. That's probably why I get pissed whenever I see those girls flocking around him. That's probably the reason why I get uneasy whenever I see him. And also, he already has his eyes on someone else so why would I feel something else, right? Heck, why would I be even thinking that I feel something else aside from friendship for him? Oh dear. I should start getting my head checked. It's putting meaning to everything too much. I shouldn't be doing this. First thing tomorrow, I'll go to see a therapist.

Well, that's what I was hoping for...

"What's up?' The heck?

"Hey! What? Are you gonna snob me now?" So I turned. Who the hell---!?

"The fuck do you want?" I'm not in the mood for some jokes

"Your first day, huh?" I just raised my brow then leave. He held my arm.

"Where are you going?" Why the heck is my heart beating hysterically? Calm down you piece of shite!

"Home. Where else?" I told him without looking back. I have to stop this heart first. What the hell is wrong with this!?

"And why are you going home?" Why would I not be going home!? What the hell does he want!? I always get pissed and  calm whenever I'm with him. Is that even possible?

"Why would I be not? Where should I be going then?" And I turned to him and raised a brow.

"We have class. Physical Education. Volleyball." He seemed shocked. 

"I'll skip it." And I turned to leave. Then he tightened his grip on me. Oh! He's still holding me? I didn't notice.

"NO. You're NOT." His voice was strain. Like the one he used on me before. It is silent but... powerful. Heck! I don't care. I want to go home. I'm not feeling well. Actually, I haven't been feelig well for sometime now. I don't really know why. And I'm never in the mood for Volleyball either. So this one's not stopping me. And also, I'm not hurting anyone. Why is he the one pissed? He's been missing for weeks and all of a sudden, he'll come up to me like that? What am I? I'm his friend, right? Well, he's not being a friend lately so why should I?

"That's what YOU say." And I snatched my arm from him and started walking faster. Most would expect he'd go after me but he didn't. And I didn't bother look back. And why would I even expect that he would. I mean, why would he care? Why would he chase after me? Will there be a reason why? I decided this for myself so... why does it seem like it hurts.

...

And so, as soon as I got out of the campus, I ran. I ran as fast as I can. I ran as if there's no one watching. I ran like I'm the only one person on earth. And I ran like the wind until the rain started pouring. I didn't care. I felt better. Running under the rain made me feel at ease. Running under the rain made me breathe. And most of all, running under the rain (until it made me tumbling down the roadside and bleed) gave me a reason to cry.

Then the rain stopped...

"Are you okay?" I kept on crying.

"You shouldn't be sitting here." Just leave.

"You could get hit or something, you know." What do you want!? Who the hell are you to tell what and what not to do!?

"You know---"

"What do you want!? Can't you just mind your own business?" And he looked shocked.

"Were you crying?"

"Do I look like I cried? Something caught my eye and made me slide down this road."

"Oh, I see. Are you---"

"Heck, why am I even explaning to you!? Who are YOU!?" I don't think I know him.

"I'm sorry. I just. Someone asked me to..." And he trailed off. Whatever! I'm not in the mood with this. I was crying. I had that. I already had a reason to cry and now, he has to show up. Best way to ruin someone's day. But then again...

"Leave me alone." And I left without waiting a response.

Why was I crying? What was I crying about? I know for a fact that I barely felt anything when I fell. And I don't have anything to complain about. I had marks and wounds but that never bothered me befor--- it's raining...

And I looked back. He had an umbrella. Whoever that guy is. Who is he? I don't think I've seen him before. And why would he even--- the hell!? Some people are naturally like that. And I shouldn't even bother.

I should think about what I'm feeling right now.

Why did I want to cry? What made me want to cry? And all the more, why are tears falling from my eyes right at this very moment? While no one's looking and no one's watching. Most of all, where am I heading?

And as I look up, a familiar place stumbled upon me. It's a place I've been familiar with for quite some time now.

And a place I shouldn't be at in the first place. 

NOTE:

Well, I'm going to continue this story after all.

I'm just having these ideas and I'm slowly trying to create a base for it.

I hope you guys would keep reading.

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Thank you. :]] I'm sorry if this is such a short update. I'm just really having these thoughts about what could be the next entry and well, I'm excited for it. :]]] Hope you guys are too. See you on my next update!