Paroxysm

Aperture

When I fell in love with you, it was as if I'd discovered the ocean after years of jumping over puddles.
I fell in deep and nearly drowned, but then you pulled me back out again
I remember when you'd sit next to me and I forgot how to breathe
I remember how you made my feet feel like they weren't really feet, but large slabs of stone and they were the only thing anchoring me to this world
Because you made me want to fly, to soar above everyone else.
You're the poetry I've never regretted writing. But pretending that I've stopped loving you is one of the most painful things I've ever had to do.
The epicenter of my earthquake
And although my head was misshapen and my tongue dances along knives, you knew that there was poetry inside of me too.
But I know that you never loved me in the same way that I loved you.
I loved you too hard, and I never thought I could fall in love with boys
But I fell in love with your soul.
I tried to rip the pieces of you from my heart, but now I'm left with hollowed out scars.
So I'll go ahead and rip my heart out.
Your name is now an aperture, and I know that you're doing just fine.
But I'm still over here pretending that I don't love you.