Paroxysm

Fervently - My Love

When I fell in love with you, my God.
It was as if there was a 24/7 gold rush flowing through my very veins.
Every heartbeat electrifying
Loving you gave me the clearest of vision after spending years of being blind.
I was living a life of blurred out graying lines
But when you looked at me, you destroyed every star in the galaxy and it seemed as though you were trying to reconstruct them through my eyes.
Drawing every constellation that was brought alive in the creases of my palms.
I wonder if you ever felt how my fingertips would trace the letters of "perfect" into your deep, creamy skin.
The colors flushing your cheeks matching every color of the rainbow, bleeding vibrance through my soul.
All the goddesses and angels, bleeding out their love.
Hemorrhaging, tugging on the saddest parts of me.
Trying to destroy me from the inside out.
But it was you, bringing a smile upon my face as your laughter would pull me in.
I believed that everything would be alright once again.
We had discovered a whole new bundled up clockwork city within one another.
Every breath you take held an adventure, carrying me far away from the pain that never seems to recede from my chest.
As your thoughts became my permanent home
Your words breaking me down to the very bone.
As our eyes meet, it was through you that I finally understood the meaning of the word "home"
How could a love that held
so much light have not been the right thing?
I still don't believe that this is wrong.
I still love you
What would you do if you ever knew?
But then we still fell apart just like everyone else.
We had tossed our hearts into the fire and then acted surprised as to why we ended up being burnt.
And love is dangerous, I know.
I would be lying if I didn't say that loving you has torn me apart beyond recognition, beyond repair.
Yet I still can't name a time when I've ever stopped loving you.