Summer Journal #1 (COMPLETE)

Domestic War

So, I haven't written anything meaningful in awhile because either my army of you guys have written about it and I don't want to copy it, but I don't know. I really want to write something meaningful and controversial because that's what people like to read, and I need all the attention because I'm a power hungry self loathing narcissistic sociopath with an anti-social disorder who also suffers from lucid dreaming when my insomnia doesn't get the best of me, and my insomnia is caused by the fact that my family is falling apart, my father doesn't like my mother, my mother doesn't like my father, my brother is on both my mom and dad side, my sis is on my moms side and I'm just torn between two people I used to love dearly and now I've turned my back on them because I can't trust them and any conversation I have with my mother turns into an argument and any conversation with my father turns to be an agreement of something and I don't want to make a fucking agreement or have any fucking arguments, I just want peace and love in my household but it is a little too late for that so I'm just gonna have to tough it through and keep praying to God to end this madness, which I have been doing for ten years and my prayers have not been answered yet and on Tuesday there is a family vacation and it'll just be me, my dad and my bro. Moms too angry with my dad to go on it with us. My sister doesn't want to go because she is an adult and she really doesn't want to see my parents argue all the fucking time. And Emma, I might just do what you did and put the mature thing on this because of my language. And I can't even escape from my house, this asylum full of madness, my dad doesn't let anyone younger than 18 to drive me anywhere, my sister is either at work or school or with a friend so I'm stuck at home listening to the acts of domestic war inside of my home. So this is it for tonight, I hope you guys have peaceful loving families and if I've learned one thing from all this fighting is that I do not want to get married, I do not want to have a partner, my parents ruined this for me and that even if I did have kids, which is something I didn't mention but fuck it, I would pass my horrible traits down to another generation. SO GOODNIGHT! IF I EVER DIE. FORGET ME. DON"T BURY ME. DON"T GIVE MY PARENTS PEACE.