Turned Out

Chapter Twenty Two

Shannon's Mother, Nadine.

Today I invited my children over for dinner. I know Shannon's going to bring that little... little... What's the correct name for a child like such? Only thing that comes to mind is hussy as of now. I would rather he leave the girl at home, but for some odd reason he likes her. Raiona has taken a liking to her, too. I, on the other hand, can't even stand to be in the presence of her.

I had just finished preparing dinner. Grilled steak strips, mashed potatoes, gravy and my famous fried corn. The fried corn didn't really go together for the meal, but it was a mix of Shannon and Raiona's favorite things. Steak and corn for Rai, Steak and potatoes for Shannon. Milan, my nephew and adopted son, would eat anything I put on the table for him. That boy could throw down. I didn't bother to ask Shannon what the girl ate, she could deal with whatever I put out.

I placed two bottles of white wine into a bucket of ice and sat them next to the dinner spread on the table. I had two other bottles stored in the fridge if we so happened to finish off these. Looking over the set out one more time, I heard the familiar clanking of keys and the door being pushed open. Not long after I could hear the small pitter patter of Milan's daughter, who's name also happened to be Milan by the choice of solely her mother, running through the house to the kitchen. Regardless of what anyone had to say about the situation, Milan was my son and little Milan was my granddaughter. I raised this boy and I'm helping to raise this girl like any grandparent would. "MiMi!" Little Milan yelled, gripping the bottom of my legs. I laughed, swooping her up and kissing her cheek.

"Hey Milly! How's my baby?"

"I'm good!" She smiled showing her missing front teeth. I nodded before setting her back down on the floor and letting her find a seat in front of the television.

"Hey ma," Milan came and gave me a half hug and then pecked my cheek. "Chanel's not coming..." He said quietly as I looked around for my second favorite daughter in law, outside of Jazlyn.

"And why not?" He shrugged as he began to walk away from me, but me being who I am, I wasn't about to let that happen. I pulled him back by his arm and turned him to face me. The stern look on my face was letting him know that I wanted the information on why Chanel wouldn't be here and I wanted it now. He rubbed his hand through his shoulder length dreads and sighed.

"She's pissed at me, ma. I don't know... She might be pregnant again..."

"Might be?" I raised an eyebrow in question.

"Okay, she is and she been blaming it all on me. Like how is it all my fault? She knew what was going down just as well as I did."

"And you want this child?

"Been wanting it... She don't though..." I shook my head and walked away. Milan already knows the words that are going to come out of my mouth next. Chanel and Milan weren't ready for Milly and then she had made it perfectly clear that they weren't going to have another unplanned pregnancy and she wanted to be married the next time around. She loves Milan, she really does, she just wants him to grow up and realize that they're going to be together for the rest of their lives. Now, I understand why Chanel is upset. She isn't ready for another baby at this stage in her life and Milan isn't ready for marriage. They're in two different places in life. But still there was no reason for Chanel not to bring her ass to my dinner. She didn't have to talk to Milan, I wasn't gone force her to if she was mad at him.

Moments later the door opened again. Raiona, her boyfriend, Shannon and the girl walked in to the living room together. They all said their hellos. I spoke to everyone except her. The door opened one more time and I instantly looked that way. I didn't invite anyone else and everyone that had a key was already here. "Mom, you should really practice locking your doors!" Chanel's voice rang through the house followed by a short laugh. A smile plastered across my face at the sound. I knew she wouldn't miss tonight.

I nearly sprinted to the door going to engulf her in a bear hug. "I thought I was going to have to come find you and drag you here my self!" I released her.

"I wasn't going to come, but Milan told me you were looking around for me... Where is he?"

"Living room with everyone else. You can have my seat at dinner so you don't have to sit next to him."

"I mean the damage is done. I won't be petty with his nappy headed self tonight."

"So, a baby huh?" I elbowed her arm, causing her to laugh a little.

"Yup, five weeks." She smiled.

Ashleigh.

I can already tell that being at a dinner table with Shannon's family is going to be uncomfortable. I know Raiona and Dallas, so no problem there but the fact that Shannon's mother doesn't like me and he all of a sudden has a brother and niece that I knew nothing about makes me nervous as hell.

"Uncle Shannon!" The little girl whose name I came to learn as Milan yelled, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"What's up, Mil?" He leaned closer to her as she waved her hands for him to come down to her height. She cupped her hands around his ear and brung her face closer to whisper something in his ear. Whatever she had said made Shannon chuckle and look my way as she spoke. His smile never left his face as she continued to whisper in his ear. "Milly," He sat back up straight and brung his arm around my shoulder. He pulled me to him, "This is my girlfriend. I think she's very pretty too. Her name is Ashleigh."

"Ew. You have a girlfriend?" She scrunched up her nose and looked at me. "You like him?" She said just above a whisper. I couldn't help but to laugh. This little girl was too grown and too cute. Shannon smacked his lips and muffed her softly, pushing her back into her seat.

"Yeah she like me. You too grown, Milly." I laughed again and smacked Shannon's chest.

"Dot get mad at her, I should be asking myself that same question." I mumbled the last part in a joking manner.

"That hurt, Ashleigh." He placed his hand over his chest and hung his head low.

"To answer your question, yes. I do like him." I leaned in over Shannon to get closer to Milan. "I like him a lot actually." I looked back at Shannon who now had a smile on his face. "You hear that? I like you fat head."

"I like yo ugly ass too." He said as I sat up straight.

"Oh! I'm telling! MiMi! Uncle Shannon said a swear w-"

"Man, shut up!" He put his hand over her mouth, cutting her off. She folded her arms across her chest still mumbling. "Ah! Did you just bite me?"

"Now I'm telling MiMi that you said two swear words!" She stuck her tongue out at him and jumped out of her chair, running away.

"What happens when you say swear words?" I asked, laughing.

"Man, my mom be talking about some 'a hundred dollars per word when you cuss in my house'. She be doing so much. I ain't trying to put none of my money in no-" Shannon was cut off by a large clear jar being shoved in his face. Milan was standing beside his mother snickering lowly.

"Two hundred dollars." Shannon huffed and puffed digging into his pocket.

"I only got a card, ma."

"Black card?" He nodded. "I'll take it!"

"Hm, I got you baby." I pulled open my clutch, digging two bills out and put them in the jar. I was not about to let Shannon's mother play him like that.

"I don't believe you're the one that was swearing." I opened my mouth to speak, but she wouldn't even let me get a word out. "Little girl..." His mother turned around rolling her eyes, neck, head, her whole damn body all in one.

"Why doesn't she like me?" I asked laying my head down on the table. This honestly bothers the life out of me. What did I do wrong? It's like she looked at me and just didn't like me. Shannon rubbed my back and pulled me back up, so I was facing him.

"I'm not sure, but I'll try to find out tonight." He kissed my cheek as everyone else made their way to the table finally.

I stayed quiet basically the whole dinner. I spoke when spoken to, but really just let them have their family time. I didn't feel a part of this, I wasn't comfortable. The whole time Shannon's mother would give me dirty looks. She talked to everyone, engaged with everyone and from just that alone you would think she was a nice and pleasant lady. Which she probably really is, just not towards me.

The dinner that Shannon's mom cooked was honestly amazing. That lady can cook her ass off. I wanted to tell her that, but I didn't feel like putting up with her attitude. "Baby," I tapped Shannon's shoulder after he finished talking. "Where's the restroom?" He excused the both of us and showed me to the nearest bathroom.

Finishing my business, I went to the sink to wash my hands. I drank a small amount of the faucet water trying to lubricate my dry throat. I hadn't felt the need to puke all day, but now being locked in a bathroom was getting to me. Every time, my throat begins to get dry and I feel like I'm going to dry heave.

I drank more of the water before going out of the bathroom. I was just about to round the corner when I heard my name come out of Shannon's mouth. I stopped in my tracks. Unknown to anyone at the table, I listened to their conversation. "Mom, you can't keep disrespecting her like that." Shannon sighed.

"I don't like her."

"Why? You have no reason. I love her. If you can't respect her, at least respect that and me."

"She's not Jazlyn!" His mother yelled, but in a whisper. "Why can't you go back to her. The mother of your first child should have your heart!" Elexa's mother? That's who the Jazlyn character that has been brought up a few times tonight is? Shannon let out a deep breath and I could tell he was rubbing the bridge of his nose. He always did that when he was becoming aggravated.

"Jazlyn will always have a place in my heart, ma. You know that, but Ashleigh has my heart. Yes, Jazlyn gave me the best gift in the world, but that doesn't mean I have to be in love with her, be with her." He paused. "We weren't together when Elexa was alive. There's no reason for us to be together now."

I let it all sink in. It wasn't that bad of a reason for his mother not to like me. A stupid reason, yes. But I kind of understand her. I was just glad that she didn't hate me for something that I did, I could work my way up to her good side. Make her forget that Jazlyn was here before me... Maybe. That much doesn't even matter, I just want to be accepted.

I turned the corner just as his mother was about to speak again. Everyone at the table looked at me and I instantly stopped. I looked at each person, making eye contact until my eyes finally met with hers. It was like she was burning holes through my soul, trying to rip me apart with just her glare. I get that she likes Jazlyn, that's her grandchild's mother, but Elexa isn't here and Shannon doesn't feel for Jazlyn like he used to. This isn't an 'I don't like you' glare, it's one of pure hate. It was like the words she had just spoke weren't even true, like there was another reason that she didn't like me. Whether that was true or not, I would most likely never find out. I didn't want to know honestly. I'm fully contempt with the reasoning she gave.

I broke away from our intense stare down, going to reclaim my seat in between Shannon and Milly. As soon as I sat, Shannon took my hand in his. He looked at me, his eyes asking how much of their conversation I heard. "I heard enough." I answered his unspoken question and gulped down the rest of the wine in my glass. He nodded and stood from the table, my hand still in his.

"I think we're going to leave."

"We haven't had dessert yet." His mother spoke.

"I know. Think about what I said mom, please." He said goodbye to Raiona and Dallas, kissed Milly's cheek and had a short laugh-filled conversation with her. He left his mother to ponder his before words, gave Chanel a half hug, and glared at Milan before throwing a head nod his way. I raised an eyebrow to that, but figured now wasn't the time to worry about it. Waving goodbye to everyone as Shannon lead me out, I started to feel relieved. I took in a huge breath as we stepped outside into the fresh air and made our way to Shannon's truck.

Darien, Skilla.

The small knock on my door had me looking away from my laptop. I already knew who it was, so I didn't even bother to answer. Leila was just going to walk in anyways.

As if on cue my door creaked open and Leila made her way in. I know she was still feeling a way about what happened last night, but she brought that shit on herself. What kind of person says 'I think you like me' or whatever it was in the middle of sex? She threw me completely of guard and simply ruined the mood.

Leila climbed into my bed and sat up on her knees with her hands in her lap staring down at me. "Can we talk?" She asked quietly.

"What's up?" I kept my gaze focused on the computer screen.

"What happened last night?"

"What you mean?"

"You were really nice to me..." She paused. "Then you kicked me out of your room in the middle of us having sex." I looked at her face, noticing the fading marks that I had put there. Even though bruised, she was beautiful. Sitting here looking at her it was hard for me to understand why I treated her so bad. Why I flipped out on her, why I beat her, why I yell at her. All over a baby that I'm not ready for? That I don't want. I'm damn near thirty acting like a bitch while this twenty one year old girl is growing and maturing everyday. I want to know why she's still here. She beautiful, funny, smart. She has her issues, but who doesn't? Leila could do better than me.

I've been taking some time, working on myself and trying to figure out why I'm acting how I am. I'll admit, I have a problem. A major one. But with a little help all can be fixed and healed, right? I hope so. I pay too much to that damn counselor for me to not be a normal ass rational person in the end.

I've even had myself tested for any types of disorder. It's been a known fact that I'm bad at holding my anger, so that was my first step. Anger management. The next was to find out if there were any other problems. I'm not bipolar, there are no internal battles that I'm fighting. I'm just messed up and afraid... Afraid to give up the life I was so used to living for a family.

Leila sighed deeply and started to get out of my bed. I reached out, pulling her back down and even closer to me. "Stay?" I asked, more than demanded. I've been trying to get that together too. Leila is not a dog, she's a human and I need to treat her like one.

"For what, Darien? You don't want to talk to me and you don't even like me being in you-"

"Sleep in here tonight, forever if you want to. Just stay." I spoke softly, cutting her off. My words brought a smile to her face and seeing her smile, made me smile. I was still trying to think of why I can't act right when it comes to this girl. I can treat a hoe like a housewife, but I treat the housewife like a dog. I shook my head, but kept my smile as Leila laid down, scooting her small frame closer to me. She laid her head on the bottom of my stomach and wrapped her arms around my waist.

"What are you doing on this dumb laptop anyways?" She looked at the screen, seeing what I had been working on for the past two days. I was a little embarrassed for her to see it, but I wanted to know how she would react to it. Her eyes slowly left the computer screen, looking up at me. The small tears forming in her eyes and the face splitting smile let me know that she loved it. "Is this for real? Pinch me, am I dreaming? Don't play with me. Seriously?" I nodded, unsure of myself, but feeling a little happy that my changes were in full affect right now. Leila leaned up pecking me softly on the lips. She looked as if she was about to say something, but changed her mind last minute and looked back down at my work on the laptop.

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*Sigh* Thank you to the writing gods for making this shitty chapter be OVER! This chapter gave me such a headache. Like I swear I wanted to cry real ass tears, it was so frustrating. The chapter still didn't come out how I wanted it, but I'm over it. I couldn't just start all over and leave y'all waiting a whole other week, so yeah. I'm out.