secrecy • cameron dallas

= THIRTY FIRST =

= Brooke =

Speechless; that's how I am at the moment.

I didn't expect him to just ask that. "Brooke, are you still there?" He asks, one more time. He's been asking me the same thing for the past minute, and as much as I wanted to speak, I got nothing.

"You okay?" Aaron asked, placing a hand on my shoulder. I looked at him and forced a smile. "Yeah." I whispered as an answer. Aaron smiled back and went back to where Bryant was.

"It's fine if you don't answer my question right now. I completely understand that this is unexpected for you, and I respect that." He explained on the other line.

I don't even know what I feel for him anymore.

"If you're ready to talk about it, just contact me whenever." Sighing, he ended the call. I stared at my phone, not knowing what to do next. I stopped staring when I felt a bottle hit the back of my head.

I turned around, seeing Cameron, smiling evilly. I wasn't actually in the mood to play along with his jokes and sht right now, so I just grabbed the bottle from the sand and threw it in the trash bin.

He looked way more than confused, and I can tell he can sense that something's wrong. "You alright?" He asked, once I walked in front of him. I stopped for a bit and gave him a small smile, nodding just a bit.

I, then, continued walking towards Bryant's car and leaned on it while waiting for them to finish. Zach's question got me thinking, a lot.

Do I still like him?

Did I really like him?

If I did, why am I questioning my feelings when it has just been a month?

Do I want to try again with him?

If I agree, is it gonna work out this time?

I had endless questions in my head which I don't even have answers for. I was completely alright before he called. I didn't have anything to worry about, besides everything I need to do for work.

Groaning, I stopped asking myself questions. Just then, Bryant, Aaron and Cam arrived, looking at me worriedly. "Are you sure you're okay?" Cameron asked. I nodded as response.

Fck, Zach. What are you doing to me?

. . .

"Do you want pizza?"

"No." Just then, Cameron plopped down on the couch, beside me. I didn't mind him, and continued watching Girl Meets World. I don't even remember ending up in Disney Channel.

I can feel his stares digging right into the sides of my face, so I turned my head sidewards to face him. "What?" I asked, annoyed. I have been in a bad mood ever since that call from Zach a while ago.

I've been thinking too much about it that it's making me grumpy. I'm already getting stressed out with figuring out my fcking messed-up feelings.

"You've never turned down pizza." He gasped, placing a hand on his chest, acting all surprised and sht. I rolled my eyes and went back to watching on Disney Channel.

"You need to tell me what's bothering you." Cam said, sighing. I actually feel guilty for making him worried about me like this, but I just don't wanna talk about it until I'm sure about what I feel.

"It's nothing. I'm just really tired." I excused. "I know you are, but I know, too, that it's not the only reason why you've been acting this way for the past few hours."

"We're friends, right?" He asked, making me look at him for a few seconds before nodding. "Then, tell me what's wrong. Friends help each other." Should I tell him? Maybe, he can help me with what I should do.

I sighed, before giving in. "Zach called." I started, making Cam tense up? Or maybe I was just too tired, I'm imagining things. "What'd he say?" He asks, sounding more interested.

"He was asking for another chance." I said. Cam furrowed his eyebrows. "Aren't you two, like together, though?" He asked, making me shrug. "I don't know?" I said, but it sounded more of a question.

"What do you mean, you don't know?" He asked, again. "We haven't talked in a month, and I don't know if we're still a thing or not." I answered, confused, as well.

It sounds like everything I'm saying right now makes no sense.

"What'd you answer to his question?" Cam asked, shifting beside me. "Nothing." I said, making him repeat what I said, but as a question. "Nothing? What do you mean?"

"I don't know what I'm feeling, okay? I'm as confused as you are." I replied, heaving a deep sigh. "You still like him." He tells me after a few seconds of silence.

"What?" I asked, but all he did was repeat himself.

"How do you know? I don't even know that, so how can you?" I asked, eyebrows knitted together. "Sometimes, the people around you know what you're feeling before you even do."

"Wait, what?" I asked, but he was already by the door, slipping on his shoes. "I have to go. Good luck with figuring everything out." He says, and before I know it, he was gone.

I sighed, turning the TV off. I went upstairs, so I can sleep, but not before going through my Twitter timeline; just to be updated with what's going on.

Soon enough, I got tired and decided to finally sleep. One tweet caught my attention making it the last thing I had in mind before darkness took over me.

@camerondallas: I hate that I want you

. . .

I've been tapping my fingers against my locked phone screen for about 10 minutes now. I was waiting for Cameron to arrive and fetch me, so we can go to the set together.

That past 10 minutes has been hell for me; mainly because, ever since I woke up, I've been thinking about calling Zach to end this battle in my brain about my feelings for him.

However, as much as I wanted to dial his number, I just can't make my hands do it. Maybe, I'm scared... but, of what? There's nothing to be anxious about, right?

It's just Zach.

After a few more minutes of contemplating, I finally pushed myself to dial Zach's number and call him; every ring passing by made me even more anxious.

"Hello?" I can feel my heart racing against my chest upon hearing his voice. I closed my eyes, and heaved a deep sigh. "Remember the thing you asked yesterday?" I ask, stuttering through the process.

I heard him cough on the other line, making me raise an eyebrow. "Are you okay?" I asked, tapping my palm against my knees. "Yeah, yeah. I just kind of choked on my water."

I nodded. "So, what about yesterday?" He asked, making my palms slightly sweat. I'm so scared right now, it's not even healthy. "I've been thinking about it all night and..."

"I'm giving you another chance. I'm giving us another try."

= = =

Yo, tf whaaat? I'm happy I've updated lol. The next one's probably next week, so stay tuned for that one! Some shiz is coming up, I think lol. :))

= caxdallas =