The Suicide Series ✔️

fourteen

And then he took an online test that told him he was depressed.

He wasn't surprised.

It was the empty feeling that drew him to search about depression.

The long days he spent sleeping because he didn't have the motivation to do anything.

The homework he had piling up.

The time he spent finding places to be  alone in his house.

It all added up to a number, rating how depressed he was.

But it was the little message at the bottom of the screen that frightened him.

The red box told him he may be contemplating suicide, and to contact a professional immediately for help.

He was scared, and he tried to talk to his parents about it.

Behind closed doors and with hushed voices, he could hear them.
They said he wanted more attention, that he's doing just fine, and they shouldn't worry.

He was more adamant, he was in need of help. He told his parents that he was scaring himself.

"Just smile, be happy!" They said.

What an easy fix, if only if it were like that.

He eventually gave up, and put on a smile whenever they were in the room.

He got back on track, did all his homework and started to do more activities to stay 'happy'.

But it didn't help. Inside he was more torn as the days went by. He was more alone and lost, with no one to turn to for help.

Until he met the blade. He'd drag it against his skin and truly feel alive for the first time in forever.

It was always careful, certain, decisive.

But he started to get more jagged, going even deeper, until there were gruesome patterns of skin and more blood spilling out each time.

Until he gets too close, too far off the path. And he can't stop himself. He throws up, he didn't mean for it to go this far.

His parents knock on his locked bedroom door, asking if he's alright. He panics and tries to hide all the blood, but there's so much and he's losing more. His struggle to hide it only makes it worse.

His dad finally breaks down the door and sees his son, his actual son, for the first time since this depression started. And he doesn't know what to do.

They try to take him to the emergency room, but there's too much blood.
He starts to get a headache and his heart is racing. He still feels like throwing up, and he does a couple of times more on the way to the hospital.

He can't hold himself up much longer, and he's unable to walk from the car to the emergency doors.
His dad has to carry him.

Nurses and doctors are stunned, they see all the blood, and are amazed he's still alive.

But he isn't for long.
They did all they could, and then he died.