Gods And Monsters

Chapter Seventy-nine:

"It's morning in Sunnydale..." Andrew, with a camcorder in hand, was videotaping the exceedingly ordinary, domestic activity in the kitchen as members of the household prepared their breakfasts.

Rona poked her head into the fridge, and emerged empty-handed. "Who the hell's got the low fat milk?"

"It's morning in Sunnydale, and the women of command central take the time to fortify themselves for the day ahead." His camera lens panned over Willow and Kennedy, who are pouring themselves bowls of cereal.

Xander, who is eating cereal straight from the box, scowled. "Hey!"

"Women and Xander." Andrew corrected himself, then lowered the camera for a moment. "Hey, I'm gonna do your special intro later. 'The man who is the heart of the Slayer machine'."

That brought a smile to Xander's face. "Yeah? The heart?" He blushed.

Andrew resumed his recording, meandering around the room. "Things are tense in command central this morning. Buffy is clearly concerned with some unknown danger, and the air is filled with foreboding."

"Oh, um, we're out of Raisin Bran." Dawn remarked, drying dishes at the sink.

"I'll put it on the list." Replied Anya.

"That's probably not the unknown danger." Andrew commented.

Spike swaggered into the kitchen, his leather duster swaying against his legs. "Look at this place. Damn girls' dorm is what it is." He fell back against the open basement door, leaning comfortably while he lit up a cigarette. He then tucked both hands into the front pockets of his black jeans.

"That's nice." Dawn quipped. "Second-hand stinkiness."

Appearing in the doorway beside him, Hel ran a hand through her black hair and stood to the left of Spike. Her hand brushed against his arm as she inched closer to him.

The slight upward slant of his mouth was almost imperceptible, visible for only for a second. He responded by removing his left hand from his pocket and deliberately grazing his fingers against hers.

Andrew was the only one who noticed their silent communication. "Did you see that, gentle viewers?" He whispered into the camcorder, the lens focused on Hel and Spike. Clearing his throat, he turned away from them and broadened the camera's scope. "Full house. I think it's a good time to do some introductions, don't you, gentle viewers?" He asked his non-existent audience.

Amanda, who happened to be positioned in front of him, waved cheerfully. "I'm Amanda, and I grew up right here—"

Andrew glanced up from behind the camera. "Not you, sweetheart." He mouthed 'sorry' to her, and continued. "Let's start from the top." His eyes seemed to glaze over, as if he were daydreaming. "You've already met Buffy. She's beautiful, with a lion's heart, and–and the face of an angel. She's never afraid 'cause she knows her side will always win." He spun around to videotape Hel and Spike again. "Hel is the mesmerising Goddess of death, stunning and intimidating at the same time. She's the Queen of Helheim, wherever that is. Her and Spike have some sort of history— you can feel the heat between them. Although, technically, as a vampire, he's room temperature." As Anya walked by, the camera followed her. "Anya, a feisty waif with a fiery temper and a vulnerable heart that she hides, even from herself." He turned the camera on a random, fair-haired Potential eating her bowl of cereal. "This lovely girl— I don't remember her name."

"Oh, for God's sake." Buffy complained to Xander. "Is he doing that again? Can't we make him stop?"

"I don't know, if we save the world, if will be kind of nice to have a record of it." Rona interjected.

Buffy rolled her eyes.

"If we don't save the world, then... nothing matters." Amanda added, contributing a less-than-positive perspective.

Kennedy paused, spoon in hand. "That's catchy, Amanda. Let's make that our slogan."

"Yeah, it is kinda strange, how you keep saving the world, and there's not any proof." Xander commented.

"Yeah, you know, for future generations." Anya joined.

"And it does help the girls with training— you know, viewing the tapes." Willow chimed in.

"Come on. No one else thinks is idiotic?" Buffy asked.

"Or, is it important?" Xander countered. "I mean, Buff, I don't get why this is bothering you so much."

"Because it's a waste of time. Come on, someone has to agree with me. Spike?"

"Long as you're not pointing that thing at me, seems like a fine way to keep the boy busy." Spike replied.

"This isn't about keeping busy. This is about war. I'm sorry to jump all over you guys, but... I have to tell you what's really going on." Buffy began, obviously about to launch into one of her lectures.

Hel strode over to the basement door, but the annoyed remark Buffy aimed at her back gave her pause.

"I'm sorry, am I boring you?"

Hel turned around, folding her arms across her chest.

"Don't you understand the seriousness of our situation?"

"Oh, I understand." Hel answered curtly. "I just don't care."

And with that, she made her exit of the room. Spike followed her through the basement entrance without a moment's hesitation and shut the door behind him.

"There's something new." Buffy resumed, addressing what remained of her audience. "Amanda, Dawn— you're gonna stay home from school today. We can survive what's coming, but not like this. I had a vision of what's to come— a horrible vision. Hundreds upon hundreds of..."

Her voice on the other side of the door became increasingly faint as Hel and Spike descended the stairs, and eventually vanished from earshot entirely.

"I wouldn't antagonise the Slayer if I were you." He advised her, chuckling.

"Why not?"

"The answer's in her job title."

She spun around, hands placed defiantly on her hips. "You don't think I could take her?" She challenged, eyebrows raised. 

Smiling, he stepped close to her and cupped her cheek. "I'm not doubting your fighting prowess, luv." He pressed a chaste kiss to her forehead, and she just about melted.