Something I Can't Have (Seme Male Reader x Kakashi) {Naruto Shippuden}

chapter 20

the next day in class....

reader pov

its different. guess i had been used to him...or them rather, fawning over me but now they are fawning over each other. i gotta admit, im kinda jealous. they look soo happy together. just giggling away in class, making tsunade upset. she yelled at them several times during her lecture. i sighed. "sooo....are you finally single," i looked over at hidan, who was also looking at the love birds. i shrugged. he let out a low chuckle. "told ya i would be the only one left," he smirked as he took notes. i mean....why couldn't i have that? they like each other. already know a lot about each other as a person cause they have been friends for forever. they just fit together. i wouldn't be surprised if they got married before they graduated. i felt a nudge. "come on. tell me whats up. you've been staring at kiba and shika since class started," asked hidan. i sighed. at least he is trying. he is right about me not being fair to him. and...he is actually trying to be a friend now so yeah. "im just.....i cant help but be jealous of what they have. they already knew everything about each other. the only thing holding them back was the sex, which i helped them solve yesterday. they are pretty much made for each other," i said. he chuckled, snaking his hand in mine. "you dont have to be jealous. i mean....im literally right here, ready to love ya," he whispered. i sighed.

"i want you to come to my room after class today. we wont have sex. i just wanna be with ya," he said. he held my hand as we walked to my class. i didn't really have a reason to say no this time. im sure he has changed at least a little. "i guess," i relented. we got to my class. i was about to walk in when he pulled me back. i looked at him. he gripped my neck and pulled me into a kiss. he pulled away, a thin line of saliva connecting our lips. "ill see ya later on," i nodded and he walked away. i headed into class. took a seat in the front row like usual. there was few people in class today. guess that is a side effect of him being missing for two days. at least i do have something to look forward too. seeing him fret all class is sure to make me chuckle. he finally walked in, getting set up like he was never gone. made eye contact with me but looked away quickly. i giggled. couldn't see it through his mask but im sure he was blushing. i just stared at him all class. im not gonna kiss him. id rather wait till he cant take it anymore and kisses me.

kakashi pov

my heart was pounding. i tried to hide it but i know he notices it. he has just been staring at me with this love struck gaze the whole class. probably fantasizing about the kiss. im glad i wore my mask. who knows what he would have did if he saw my blush. it was ten minutes till the end of class. "go ahead and hand in your worksheets. ill let you guys go early today. please tell the missing students about what was done so they can catch up on their own. i need to move quickly to get us where we need to be before the first research paper is due," i said. shit. i just wanna get it out of the way. i really dont like this hanging over my head. i know i was shaking all this class, as well as my previous class, in anticipation. the students were filing by my desk dropping off their work sheets as they headed out. he made sure he was the last one. he got up, hoisting his book bag on his shoulder and picking up his worksheet. he walked towards my desk, my heart pounding with each step he took. he set his paper on the pile then....he just walked out. wait...hold the fuck on, why didn't he cash in on the promise? what kinda game is he trying to play here? here i am all ready and shit to get it out the way and he just walks out. that son of a bitch. that's it. he aint getting it now. im done. im not gonna play the stupid games of one of my students. im fine. i dont need this. i knew it wouldn't work out in the first place. i sighed. i did know it wasn't gonna work out but i still wanted it too. is that bad? i mean....i desperately need a boyfriend. holding out for so long, not counting that incident of which we will never speak up again, is starting to get to me. i dont wanna lower my standards. i want a good man who will like me for me. i want a relationship that is meant to be. i was hoping me and john could have.....my face felt hot, but he is just playing with me and i dont like that. i dont like people who play with my feelings that i will never show. especially not to my closet crush. his staring did make me uncomfortable but....i kinda liked it. being admired like that was sorta turning me on. i shook my head. i cant. im not gonna chase him. im better than that. im a 30 year old mature man. i dont do games....no matter how fun im sure john would have made them.