Colours of Love

Chapter XX : Coffee Allure

He was like luxurious chocolates
Just one bite makes us melt down
And when he whispers sweet words in our ears
We can't run away from him...

- Un Chocoholic -
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Her taste didn't change.

Hiyama thought, as his eyes unconsciously shifted to focus on the young woman's hand, which was pouring milk into the coffee cup surrounded by curls of smoke.

After the awkward sentiment left, Aki had come up and asked to sit with him, so he replied with the most neutral tone possible to hide his nervousness. Aki managed to calm down, and they finally exchanged a few sentences.

Breaking the silence, Hiyama asked "So, how have you been... these recent years?"

"...I was fine, I finished my studies and now I'm back for an offer at X pharmaceutical company, nothing important. ...Have you been well?" Aki replied. I missed you a lot.

"I'm preparing for higher education, still going for the doctor route to take over my family hospital, so yeah... nothing different from 4 years ago."

Aki badly longed for a proper talk, but she could only muster up unimportant, typical phrases like "Nice weather, huh?"

Then came a long, awkward silence, with both growing more fidgety, stirring their half-empty coffee cup.

It was only until Aki shakily trembled a "I'm so sorry about what I did to you", that Hiyama froze.

They knew what the sorry was about.

Hiyama had imagined plenty scenarios about when they meet again, but for Aki to be so upfront about it still slightly shook him. For her to say it like this, she must have beat up herself over it a lot. To be honest, he had imagined her shyly delivering a "Sorry" with a soft smile he was so used to, and him grinning back saying "It's alright." But now that it occured, and in such a serious manner too, the pressure was a bit unbearable.

He had always believed that she had a reason to do so, but he never dared to ask. Sometimes when the longing became suffocating, he would check her social media account to see an update, to see if she was well, to see what she has been up to. But he never reached the chat button. They were both cowards.

Of course it was overwhelming and painful for him, but he instinctively knew that she felt the same. He never blamed her, but she didn't know that.

And so they both suffered.

Hiyama, unable to process the emotions, was only able to respond with "Yeah, I know."

"I can't imagine how you had felt when I said those hurtful things. And I'm even more sorry for having never contacted you afterwards, I never had the courage to. Countless times I would have typed something in the chat, but maybe I was even more afraid of seeing your response, and it just kept recurring until now." Aki paused a bit, as if arranging her jumbled thoughts, or trying to hold back her tears.

"I'm not asking for forgiveness, because after all that you went through, I doubt anyone could forgive me. ...Perhaps I just wanted to relay to you that I am so so sorry, that if given the chance I would like to make it up to you anywhen possible, that I selfishly want to wish you a good life, and that at request I will immediately disappear from your life." Aki was already at the verge of crying, but managed to stop after a few drops fell. Hastily wiping her tears, she stared at him, no longer wanting to be a scaredy-cat who would avert his gaze. She was ready to receive the punishment bestowed onto her.

Hiyama smiling sadly, did not move.

"It's... alright," a few words came across. He actually wanted to say I forgive you. The only thing he wanted to ask was why she broke up with him, and then maybe figure out that it wasn't a big deal, then reconcile with her.