Complicated

Chapter 21

Lydia's POV

"What are you doing here" I said looking into his scared looking eyes

"Let me explain" Jordan calmly said as he started walking towards us

Tyra studied the situation then grabbed my hand for a second "I'm just gonna be downstairs, I'll let you guys be alone" she said before getting up and walking out the door.

Jordan and I sat there looking at each other for a minute

"Who was that message from" I said with a tear filled eyes and a cracky voice

He took a few more steps towards me before sitting on the bed and grabbing my hands "Lydia I need you to let me explain everything" he said looking into my eyes and trying to calm me down

I stayed sitting there trying to prepare myself because I had no idea what he was about to tell me

"It was Shanda" he said slowly

I pulled my hands away and got off the bed "You're talking to Shanda?!" I said in disbelief

"No baby it's not like that, yesterday while I was waiting for you and Tyra to be done talking she just came up to me and started telling me to break up with you and go out with her instead. And then when I said no she started naming reasons why we won't work so I just shut her down and walked away"

There were a few moments of silence before I finally said something"What were the reasons"

He looked like he didn't want to tell me "Those things don't matter to me Lyd, all that matters is now" he said grabbing my hands again

I pulled my hands away "What were the reasons Jordan"

He looked around the room and then stood up looking like he wanted to hit something.

"Distance Lydia, she thinks we can't make the distance once I move to university" he yelled taking a step back

I could feel my tears building up again as I watched him pace around the room "well do you believe her..?" I said quietly again

I watched as he picked up a picture I had framed of him and I and he just stared at it for a minute or so "Jordan answer me"

He looked up at me and I saw a tear fall "I don't know what to believe, it'll be hard and grad is only a few months away" he whispered

"You don't think I've already thought about this?" I said before walking over to him and taking the picture from him "look at us in this picture, don't you think this is worth trying for?"

"Of course I do Lydia, I'm just so scared" he almost yelled

"I'm scared too Jordan! I'm scared you'll go to university and find someone better, I'm scared you'll forget about me, I'm scared for the day that we might just lose connection and then never talk again. I'm scared because I love you" tears were now uncontrollably coming out

"We're letting her get to us, this is exactly what she wanted" he said shaking his head. "I just love you so much and I can't imagine losing you"

"You don't have to, people do distance all the time" I reassured him

"I don't want to hurt you, I'll only be home on weekends if I'm lucky"

I couldn't believe what he was saying and I couldn't help but start to doubt his feeling about me.

"Do you want this to work? Because it sounds like you're making excuses for it not to" I half yelled trying to make sure my parents didn't hear

"Of course I want it to!" He yelled back