The Six Degrees Of Separation

Chapter 12 : Rumor Has It

March.

Rumors.

Bad rumors.

"I heard that Oliver's not over Whitney!"

"Oh gosh, poor Leighton!"

"Who's Leighton?"

"But apparently Whitney's not over Oliver at all either!"

"Wow, must be awkward for Leighton..."

"WHO'S LEIGHTON?"

When I heard the last one, it hurt the most. They didn't know that Oliver was dating me, they still thought he was with Whitney. Why? Weren't we public enough?

I felt awkward. I felt like I was the one intruding THEIR relationship, when it was actually Whitney. Or was it? Maybe it WAS me. 

Aaron sent me an email. 

It wasn't any significant day, just another random Tuesday. I clicked on Gmail, and my eyes widened when I saw an email from someone who's name I hadn't seen in my inbox for ages. Aaron Schmidt. He'd sent me an email. 

It was hate mail. I wasn't really surprised. I should've ignored it. But I couldn't resist. I couldn't just let him insult me without putting up a fight. 

It broke my heart over and over again, it reminded me of how worthless I was, it insulted both Chinese and British culture, it made me mad, it made me sad. 

I knew why I broke up with Aaron. He was mean. Plain mean. 

But one of the last messages gave me informaton. 

Aaron Schmidt sent you an email!

Your love? It's FAKE. Fake, I tell you. Oliver doesn't really like you. No one in their right mind would want someone like you anyways, lol. Gretchen told me that Oliver asked her if it would be two timing if he asked Whitney out again after you'd moved to Hong Kong. Loser. No one fucking wants you bitch. He still likes Whitney. He just doesn't want to dump you cuz he doesn't want to hurt your feelings or anything. Lol what a pussy Oliver is. Fucking bastard. 

I knew it. I knew something like this would happen. That's why I'd tried to prepare myself. I tried to prepare myself for the worst. I tried so hard to not fall deeply in love with Oliver, just in case he changed his mind about me. Just in case he dumped me for Whitney. But I had failed myself. I had let myself fall. Deeper, and deeper in love. 

Unconfidence struck again. How was I supposed to act, now that I knew this? Maybe Oliver didn't want me after all. Just another guy, looking for a girlfriend, trying to make his ex jealous? Was I being used? Why didn't anyone tell me earlier? I could've tried harder to prevent this depression I was plunging into. Gretchen had told Aaron. Why hadn't she told me? Didn't she trust me anymore? Was she trying to protect my feelings? It hadn't helped though. Aaron told me. Now, I was crushed. 

I talked to Paige. I talked to Tianna. I talked to Claire, Aisling, Josie, and of course, Gretchen. But I didn't ask her about the things Aaron had told me. I didn't ask her why she hadn't told me.

 I opened up my MacBook Pro, the login window appearing. I clicked on my account, leigh shay evs<3. Password? my computer asked me. I typed in my password that I had changed after Oliver asked me out. iloveoliverau. I knew that Oliver's password was 416, because that was my birthday. I cringed, remembering that day we both took out our laptops, showing each other our passwords. Did he love me?

It started happening gradually after that email. Old feelings for old crushes started coming back to me. What the hell, I thought. I still have Oliver, why were there other guys in my mind? I was messed up. 

The crushes that came creeping back into my mind were Russell Ley, Mitchell Choi, and Jeff Huang. They were all pretty much the cutest, nicest, funniest, most amazing guy friends I'd ever had. 

Russell. He was my best friend, I could always count on him. He always teased me, and we had our fights but we always managed to make up. I loved Russell, he was funny, nice, cute, hot. I liked him before in 6th grade as well as between me and Aaron's breakup and Oliver asking me out. 

Mitchell. Mitch was someone I'd developed a crush on way long ago in 3rd grade. My feelings for him had its ups and downs but the affection for him never died down and somehow always came back to me. It was like my feelings for him were magnets. Even if you pulled it away, it would somehow come back and stuck like glue. 

Jeff. He was new this year and the first time I saw him, my heartbeat stopped. I remember that day perfectly, him walking into our drug education class awkwardly and taking a seat diagonal from me. I liked him, I knew it, but the feeling shrunk over time. Yet now, it seemed to be coming back to me. Jeff had confessed to me that he had a crush on me a few weeks after Oliver had asked me out in December. But I already knew because according to Madison, "Secrets, secrets are no fun, unless you share with everyone." Jeff had told Paige during fall break, Paige told Madison, and told her not to tell me. But Madison being Madison, and being my friend, couldn't resist. She blurted the whole thing out, that Jeff had a crush on me. Jeff and I, though, had horrible timing and we never liked each other at the same time, or at least knew about it. 

So it went on like that for around a month or so. But I had to confess somehow. So I finally decided to ask Gretchen. Was it true, what Aaron had told me? Or was he trolling me?

"Yeah, how'd you know?"

I cringed and whispered, "Aaron."

Gretchen admitted. It was true. It was fact. Oliver had asked her if it would be double crossing if he asked Whitney out after I left.

I was sure that I heard my heart crack.

What the hell Oliver.

I loved you.

I trusted you.

I thought you were the one.

I thought you wouldn't break my heart.

I thought maybe this might end perfectly.

Sure, it was a two months ago that he asked Gretch. But what if he still felt that way?