Never Leave Me Alone

Chapter 10

Anya's POV

Walking in the house I quickly found my spot on the sofa without looking at Shalonda. Following me, she decided to take the seat across from me.

"I'll leave you two alone," Antonio said, "I'll be upstairs."

I didn't want him to leave me alone with her but I nodded anyway understanding that he didn't want to be in the middle of it. I looked up at Shalonda for what seemed like the first time tonight waiting for her to begin only to find her looking at the ground.

"Well?" I said breaking the silence. The sooner I could get her to begin her 'story' the sooner it will be for her to get out of here.

"Well, um," she said as she cleared her throat.

"Firstly, I want to say that I'm sorry," she said nervously, a tone that I've barely heard from her lately. Tears began to form in her eyes but I refused to let them get to me. Nodding, I kept glaring at her to let her know what I was thinking. I wasn't letting her off that easy this time.

Breathing in deeply, she met my eyes.

"I need to tell you something," she said her voice tense.

"What?" I asked in a bitter tone but curiously at the same time.

"Me and Trevor aren't married," she blurted out quickly.

"I mean we are together now but not exactly married," she said raising her eyebrows waiting for my reaction. What did she mean they're not married? Why would she lie about something like that?

"What do you mean? Why lie about it?"

"I don't know? Because I was angry and jealous of you. I wanted to have something that you had. I guess I kind of took things too far," she said whispering the last part as if she was ashamed to say it.

I clenched my jaw as more anger began to take over.

"So you were intentionally trying to hurt me?!" I said standing up.

"And why would you be jealous of me?! I'm the one who got kick out. I'm the one who got raped! I'm the one that was left all alone! I had no one Shalonda! If it wasn't for Mr. Harper or even our Grandma pitching in, I don't know where I would be!" I yelled at her, tears falling from my eyes. I was angry that I couldn't have a normal childhood. Instead I had to grow up and began to take care of myself. I had to juggle jobs and school for a long time.

"You were raped?" she asked, her eyes widening in shock.

"That's besides the point," I said quickly changing the subject, "Why would you do that to me?"

"You don't understand!" she said standing up with me.

"Understand what Shalonda?! You have the relationship with mama that I wish I could have back!"

"No Anya!" she screamed before throwing her head in her hands. She took deep breaths before looking up at me.

"That day when someone found you in the alley," she said pausing as if she was reminiscing about it. I flinched. I had just dreamed about that day not too long ago. Those memories were too painful for me. He had raped me that day and gotten away with it. He threatened my family; the thought of them getting hurt was enough to keep my mouth shut. Until this day I haven't really told many people about it. I even failed to mention that when I was telling Antonio the things that have happened to me.

"Charles was arrested for possession of drugs. Mama was so mad," she said interrupting my thoughts her eyes blank. I waited for her to continue.

"She would try to hit me the way she hit you that night. She said she wanted to be alone so she had me stay with Jaylah a few weeks. Somehow Charles charges got dropped so he came back home. That's when mama wanted me to come back all of the sudden. As much as I didn't wanna go back I went. Everything was cool at first but then Charles started flirting with me. He was saying things like 'Since I can't have your sister, I'll just have you.' I was terrified. I didn't want to tell mama because I was afraid she would flip out again. Then one night when mama decided to stay out late, me and Charles were left alone. He decided to make his move that night. He came in my room that night, the way he did when you were there. He came over to my bed and began to whisper in my ear about things that he desired. At first I was frozen but then I tried to get away but he was too quick for me." She paused looking down at the ground, her face turning red as tears rolled down her cheeks.

"He raped you?" I asked already knowing the answer. She nodded.

"He wasn't gentle either," she said trying to hold back her sobs but couldn't for long. Soon she was in full blown tears. I came over to her and put my arms around her letting her cry on my shoulder. I silently cried with her feeling her pain. I contemplated on telling her the details of what happened to me but left it alone. I still couldn't get myself to talk about it.

"I was so mad at you," she said softly as her crying slowed down. She lifted herself off my shoulder and looked me in my eyes.

"I needed you and you couldn't be there. I was so angry at you because I felt you were lucky."

"Lucky? How could I be lucky?"

"Because you were able to get out," she said plainly.

"I wanted to make you suffer the way that I was."

"Don't you think that I suffered enough as well?"

"Of course, but I guess I was blinded by my own pain to see that you were just as bad off as I was."

"So instead of getting back at mama or Charles for doing these things to you, you began to act like them towards me." I said aloud. Her eyes shot up to mine quickly.

"What do you mean I began to act like them?"

"You know exactly what I mean." I said looking back at her. I could tell I offended her at first because she clenched her jaw as if she was getting angry but soon relaxed and nodded her head with a thoughtful look on her face.

"I guess you're right."

"So you never told mama about the rape either?" I asked. She shook her head.

"That would have only made her angrier."

I nodded in understanding but not liking the idea that my baby sis had to hide such a painful secret like I've had to.

"I'm sorry again about Trevor," she said giving me an apologetic look. I shrugged.

"It's okay now, I'm over it. If you really like him then you can stay with him."

"No it's not okay. That was a really low blow. Mama convinced me that I should go out with him. I only took it as an opportunity to get back at you."

"Wow, everything was my fault," I said sarcastically.

"Almost. Well in my mind anyways," she said seriously.

"Oh yeah mama really brainwashed you," I said jokingly but I was sort of serious. She laughed.

"Thank you," she said.

"No problem."

"So everything's good here?" we heard Antonio ask from the stairs. I laughed at the nervous look he had on his face.

"Yuppp," I said popping the p.

"See? I told yall talking would be good for yall," he said sounding confident again.

"Oh yeah? Just a few seconds ago you looked as if you thought it was a bad idea," I said laughing.

"Yeah I kinda did for a second," he admitted, "it got kinda quiet down here so I thought one of you killed the other for a second. I had to check to make sure."

"WOW," I said sarcastically causing him to smile. Shalonda laughed at us. I smiled at her. It was amazing how in a couple of minutes you can change your whole mind about someone. Not too long ago I really didn't mind if I hadn't ever seen her again but now I couldn't imagine ever having to lose her again. I felt as though I'd gotten my sister back and that thought made me feel so much better.

"Well I have to go," Shalonda said standing up.

"Okay, let me walk you to the door," I said.

Once she made it to the door we both gave our goodbyes. I was happy we were on a good note again.

Shalonda's POV

Pulling in my driveway I began to think about everything that had just happened. I was so happy that I had my sister back and I wasn't planning on doing anything to jeopardize our relationship like that ever again. My thoughts went back to my mama. I had forgotten to tell Anya about mama staying at her place. I decided to handle things myself knowing that Anya wouldn't want to deal with mama. It wasn't as if I was thrilled to have to do it but I figured it would be better if I do it then her, right? Pulling out my phone I decided to handle things right then.

"Hey I'm sorry, I know it's late but it's important. We really need to talk."