It Will Never Be The Same (boyxboy)

Chapter 64

I'm worried, no, I'm scared, terrified actually. Luhan just disappeared, well, not exactly. He told me where he was going, but he just seemed off, and I feel extremely uneasy about this entire situation.

Luhan didn't give me exact details, like what he needed so badly, or why he had to go down there right that second. I'm nervous he won't come back and will disappear again, but he has my car, and if he has my car, I'll eventually be able to find him.

Twenty minutes after he left I'm hating myself for letting him leave. I would have bought him a new one of whatever he needed, no, I would have bought him a hundred if it meant he'd stay here.

Twenty minutes turn into forty and forty turns into an hour and forty minutes, so on and so fourth. Around the middle of the second hour I become worried, very worried even though I know I shouldn't be.

I started to call Chanyeol as well before remembering he's on his honeymoon and probably doesn't want to be bothered. I call Suho next, needing someone to talk to about this because I'm getting fidgety.

I tell him a few details, not as many as I would have with Chanyeol because Chan knows Luhan as well as I do, but he helps me pass the time.

Four hours go by, and it's two in the afternoon. I know I just need to calm down and realize he's probably talking with them or on his way home. I just need to be patient.

I begin cleaning the house, knowing I need to get my mind off worrying about him, and clean it well. I vacuum, sweep, mop, dust, wash dishes, take trash out and basically do all the chores my maids normally do.

It was now four, and I didn't have Luhan's friends phone numbers, seeing I'm still annoyed about having them get Luhan into the situation he's dealing with now.

I begin to pace, convincing myself that with each step, he's getting closer and closer to being home.

It's getting dark now.

And I have no idea why he isn't back yet.

Nor what he needed so badly.

I'm so worried.

Where is he? Why isn't he home yet? He said he'd be back, he wouldn't lie to me! Would he?

Minute by minute.
Time goes by,
my love,
my life,
he's still gone,
it's like he's on a different planet that I can't get to. I want him to come home, I need him to come home, or I'm going to eternally hate myself for letting him leave.

The suns coming up.

Luhan's not back. He's my life, he's my air, he's my anchor and my best friend. I'm ready for him to come home, I'm ready to hold him in my arms and never let him go.

How could I have done this?

Why would I do that?!

Why am I such a fuck up??

Why did I let him leave?

What did he need so badly?!?!?!

Around ten, twenty fucking hours after he said he'd be back, and he's not back. I need him, if he isn't back before this days over I'm going to go find him. Maybe he just stayed the night there? He probably missed his friends and needed to be away from me for a while? That's all it is, he'll be back, I know he will.

I sit on my couch, thinking about when he would cuddle with me in his cute onesie or about when he first started coming over. My heart aches as I think about what would happen if he didn't come home. I don't know what I would do, because I don't want anything or anyone other than him.

I'm shocked when I hear the door bell ring which sends me flying off the couch and into the entry way.

"Hello, we need to use your house." Kris says as him, Chen, and Lay push their way into my home.

"What?! What are you doing here? Where's Luhan?" I ask as follow them, completely thrown off.

"He's in the car, where's your guest room?" Chen asks as I roll my eyes and hurry to the front door, wanting to see him.

"Yo, Sehun, wait!" Kris calls, stopping me before I can leave.

"What? I want to see him-"

"No you don't, please just let us stay here for a few days because he needs us but he needs to be here." He explains as I bush my eyebrows together.

"What's going on? Why didn't he come home last night?" I ask as he shuts the door and drags me back to where Chen and Lay are.

"Luhan's going through something, and we can't keep him at our place because he'll get into stuff-"

"What?! What are you talking about-"

"It's his mind, he thinks he's back at our place and it's around the time we tried to get him off some stuff-"

"What kind of stuff? Luhan isn't like that." I defend as Chen chuckles softly like I'm innocent and adorable.

"You don't know what you put Luhan through, long story short, he needs to stay here and get better in a clean environment. You won't have to do anything, just leave it to us, we've been through it before and can do it again. He hasn't used anything in a long time, I know he wouldn't, but his body thinks he has-"

"What was he using-"

"Don't worry about that now, you just go sit your pretty ass upstairs while we bring him in-"

"I will not!" I object before they begin mocking me and laughing.

"Look, if he wants you, we'll get you, but he said he didn't want you to see him like this, so take your ass upstairs-"

"No, this is my fucking house and I want to see him now-"

"What part of no do you not understand? Luhan doesn't want you to see him like this for a reason. He said you'd understand, and that you'd respect his request but obviously not." Lay says as he crosses his arms and looks away from me like he's disappointed.

"Goddamn it." I groan before agreeing.

AN// hello everyone! I hadn't realized how long it had been since I last posted on this book so please forgive me!! I hope you enjoyed this crap chapter but there will be more to come!! I promise! Love you guys!!(: I also tried to post this last night but wattpad wouldn't let me!! Ugh it was so frustrating but I got it up now!!(: