Him. // M.C. 5SOS

Chapter 31

(I suggest listening to Broken - Lifehouse)

{Alanis}

I slam my house door and run to my room. I lock my bedroom door and lay on my bed and cry. I feel my pillow becoming soaked in tears and mascara.

My chest hurts and I can't breathe.

I sit up and tears continue to fall. I pull off my shirt and pants, having nothing but my tank top and underwear covering me. I put on short shorts and go to my bathroom.

I can't believe he did that.

I grab my box of razors my parents tried to hide from me in 8th grade.

I fall to the floor and cuddle in the corner. Why would he do this to me? I haven't felt this pain in a long time. Why does she have to be so much better than me? Am I not worth it?

I hate myself!

My face is completely soaked with tears. I pull out a razor and make a fist. I slowly cut diagonal lines across my wrist.

It hurts but it feels so good as if it is like, relief.

My arms are now coated in blood, everything starts to get blurry and my head pounds.

I put the razor away when I hear my Dad call us down for dinner. I do not want to eat.

My voice is too weak to yell back. I wash my arms and go to my room and put on my large hoodie to cover my arms and sweatpants.

I see Joseph start to walk out of his room. "Hey Joseph, tell Dad I don't want to eat." I loudly whisper to him, since my throats feels sore and I can't really talk.
"Why? What's wrong Sister?"
"Don't worry about it. Please just tell him I don't want to eat."

He gives me a worried look before agreeing without anymore questions.

I sit back down on my bed, trying to control my breathing. I feel my phone vibrate and check to see I have 3 new messages.

From: Boyfriend <3 (Mikey) at 8:40pm
Alanis please answer me
From: Boyfriend <3 (Mikey) at 8:47pm
I'm sorry we really need to talk
From: Boyfriend <3 (Mikey) at 8:56pm
Please, I messed up and I want to apologize :'(

My chest tightens when I see his contact name in my phone is still the same, I didn't have the strength to change it, though.

I turn my phone off and lay on my bed and cry into my pillow. I don't know what I'm going to do.

It's all starting to sink in.

He cheated on me.

We had sex, then he cheated on me.

He used me.

»»»»

{Michael}

I sit alone in my room. I can't stop crying. I can't help it, it really hurts. I couldn't imagine how she feels right now.

I check my phone again for the 10th time in the last two minutes. She still won't answer me.

I hear a knock on my door "Go away!" I yell to whoever is at the door. There is no response except another knock so I sit up and answer it. It's my dad.
"What do you want?" I ask unamused.
"Son, what happened?"
"I fucked up, Dad! I fucked up so bad and I don't know how I'm going to fix it! I don't know." I whisper that last part as a put my head in my hands and completely fall apart.

He was quiet for a moment, probably surprised at my language but I don't care. It stays silent for a few more minutes as tears starts to stream down my cheeks. He sighs and finally starts,
"What'd you do to her?"
"Well—Do you remember Haley?"
"Oh my stars Michael, you didn't?"
"Yes, Dad, I did. She probably hates me now."

I curl up on the end of my bed and cry into my pillow. "I hurt her so bad, and that is killing me. I regret kissing her. It didn't even mean shit. It didn't even feel like anything, not like the way it felt with Alanis."
"Give her a little bit of time to cope, then go and try apologize and make it up to her."
"Okay. Can I be alone now?"
"Okay, just remember that we all make mistakes. You're human. It's natural. I love you Mike, I'm sorry about that by the way."
"Thanks."

~~~~~~~~

A/N: this chapter was actually really hard to write, but the beginning was the hardest. My chest was hurting as I wrote it.

K guys this is gonna be a little longer of an authors just cuz I have a story to tell ... okay so me and this guy were talking and finally met up the other day and OMG! I can't stop thinking about it I swear /.\ he kissed my cheek a couple times and one time when he did he nose like rubbed on my cheek and it was adorable ! He held my hand and I leaned on him and I played with his hair and it was just beautiful. He smelled really good too XD my shirt smells like him now :3 I'm super giddy about it now so yep... that was my weekend teehee

Vote please ❤️

K bye xx