Its been a month since Harry left, life's been terrible ever since. It's Ross's funeral today, today's my weakness, i'm going to cry, no doubt. I sent Zayn the details for the funeral, i know that everyone loved Ross, he was such a bright person, big goofy smile, warm heart. The only person that didn't like him was Harry.
It was such a miserable day, the sky was dark and cloudy, it wasn't raining but it was windy. I put on my black dress with a laced back and a black flower to go in my hair and clip my fringe back, and to finish it off, my black high heels.
I wonder if Zayn would come along with Niall, Louis and Liam. What if he made Harry come to, i hope so.
-Zayns POV-
"The funerals in an hour, we need to leave now" Niall said as he chucked my shoes at me "Yeah come on" Liam added "I'm not going" Harry said miserably, hes been blocking out everyone ever since he left Pixie "Harry you can't stay here forever, you love her, you need to go get her" i said "Its best if i stay away" Harry said as he tightened his grip on his phone "Harry, you cried whenever you listen to the voice mails she sends you, you cry every single night, and we all know you try to keep your tears in whenever you think of her, which is all the time, and Harry, it hurts us all when we see you like this, you know that right?" Louis said "I don't care" harry whispered "Fine whatever, we are going now, we will see you later" I said as i walked through the front door, Louis, Niall and Liam followed
I feel so sorry for Pixie, she must been in such a state, i can't wait to see her face when she see's us, she will be o happy, or she will be pissed because we left her, or both, who knows, all we can do is find out
-Harrys POV-
I don't know what to do. I'd do anything to see Pixie again but i can't, all i do is cause pain for her. She loves Ross anyway, besides who would date me, when he Zayn said i love her and that i need her, hes wrong, how does her know how i feel, i have had loads of girlfriends, he always says i never love them so why is he saying i love Pixie. He's so confusing, or i'm confusing, well to be fair, i do cry over her, and this is the longest i have been depressed over a girl, actually, i've never been upset over a girl before, only Pixie.
Maybe Zayn is right, maybe i should go see Pixie. What am i doing? I'm Harry Styles, i don't just sit back and let the girl i love be in pain while i'm avoiding her because i'm in depression mode, she means everything to me and i'm nothing with out her, but i don't want to be nothing, i want to be Pixies Boyfriend, but i fucked that up. Why am i thinking to myself? I'm such a nerd.
"Shit! the funeral" i shot up and looked in the mirror, i looked like a tramp, so scruffy, i hadn't had a shower in days and i haven't brushed my teeth in more than a month, there was no need to, its not like i was going to kiss Pixie.
I hopped into the shower and washed my hair and body, it felt so good to be clean for once I dried my self off and brushed my teeth for about 5 minutes, and i flossed for about 3 minutes I put on my suit and shoes and looks in my full body mirror, i looked good, apart from the frown on my face. I can't believe i'm doing this, i want to but i'm afraid that she will hate me. Maybe it will be ok, we can sort everything out and she will be happy, then we will go prom together like we were supposed to and we can live a long life together and have children, and then become grandparents and then die in each overs arms.
