CHOKER

Volume 20: Hearts to blame

(edited)

~Ana's P.O.V~

         The following days I've been monitored like a child and confused. Nathan left that early cold morning in an angry fit of rage. He had confessed his undying love for me and pleaded for me to come back with him. After he stormed out, Stephan quickly followed after him, pity marked on his face. I could tell that he felt sorry for Nathan and that he deeply disliked him. The next thing I knew, a loud slam was heard from downstairs. I believe Stephan had given him some money to get him a plane ticket back to Ironbrook. Xander has been at my side ever since. He sat casually on my floor, watching my painted door. He left occasionally to bring me food and insisted that I stayed in bed for rest. He was dosing off at my bedside, making me smile. I quickly swung my legs over the edge and proceeded to stand up. I haven't showered in two days, I was in desperate need of a steamy warm shower.

     My pale, bare feet padded against my floor, leaving my room. The house has been quiet ever since the unfolding events with Nathan. I walked down the hall and stairs to find a large bathroom. The shower and bathtub were separate, with smooth marble walls and a large mirror and sink. Along the sink's edge sat a shaving razor and a trashcan beside it. I quickly pulled back the shower curtain and twisted the handle, making warm water sho out from the showerhead. I undressed and stepped in, savoring my relaxing muscles. I pushed all the current events to the back of my mind, I don't want to think about them, I thought.

     I stood there for thirty minutes before deciding to wash my hair and body. I struggled with washing my sensitive areas and touching my own body. I  whimpered, holding it in before tears escaped my burning orbs. I whimpered again before letting out a loud sob. The world slammed into me all at once and I wasn't prepared. I wasn't prepared to see Adam this early nor what happened. I collapsed to the shower's floor before curling up in a ball. My heart pounded in my chest with sorrow and pain, causing me to tremble. My hands gripped my soaked hair and the water pummeled me from above. I was loud, and crying because of the pain I'll need to live with forever. My face was frozen in an anguished expression as I rocked back in forth, trying to comfort myself. A knock was heard at the door, causing me to tremble more. I wanted to be left alone in this pit of dread and anguish. I wanted to rock with my pain in solitude and suffer alone. 

"Ana, are you okay?"  Xander asked, speaking softly. I didn't respond, him asking that question only made me cry harder.

Do I attract horrible things? I thought.

He didn't take my sobbing for an answer. He didn't understand that I wanted to be alone not take that hint. He twisted the knob, entering and sitting on the toilet. 

"I will never understand the pain you're feeling right now. I hate myself for letting this happen to you and I hate myself for including you in this. I'm the reason for this happening, Nathan was right.," he said, trailing off. He remained silent for a moment before opening his mouth to speak again.

"May I?" He asked, tugging at the shower curtain with a pained expression. 

"You should stay away from me, Xander. All I seem to do is attract terrible things," I choked out, sniffling as another tear rolled down my cheek. He let out a quick huff before taking off his shoes and opening the shower curtain. I was pushed up against the wall, curled into a ball. He slid beside me with full clothing on, wrapping his arms around me. The water rained down above us as he stared blankly ahead. My skin screamed at his touch, wanting to remove itself to avoid his touch. He was empathetic and soft, he showed true regret and remorse for many of his actions. He was terrified of me rejecting him because of Adam, he didn't want me to blame him or he wouldn't handle it. I placed my head into his soaked shirt as I sobbed deeply. With his free arm, he placed his hand in mines, kissing my forehead. 

      The scene I had caused was interrupted by the hurt face of Kimberly. She stared at us in the shower, Xander's harm around me and his hand in mine, trying to best comfort me. She bit her lip in anger while tapping her foot, entering. Xander broke his gaze from ahead of him to his angry girlfriend in the doorway. She scoffed, staring down at the two of us before shaking her head. 

"Don't you think that I need you just as much as she needs attention?" She shot and asked. He let out a sigh, removing his arm from around me and slipping his hand from mine. Xander stood up, getting out of the shower as his drenched clothing gathered puddles under him.

What's your deal with her? I mean, seriously?!" She yelled with anger. Xander signed, rubbing his forehead as I stared at the two, tears ceasing to fall.

"Can't you see that she needs us right now? I'm not going to argue with you. If you have a problem with it, just leave me," Xander said sternly. Kimberly stared at him with a hurt expression, she stood there with her mouth slightly open. 

"Fine, you fucking asshole," she snapped, turning on her heel and walking away. I arose from the floor and stepped out. Xander handed me a towel as I proceeded to wrap it around me firmly. 

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   *Kimberly's POV*

          I walked away wishing countless things on Analise. She took the spotlight from me and she constantly plays the victim card. She believes that she's an angel, a baby bird. Adam was right about her and how she has no backbone. If she wouldn't have run off then maybe she wouldn't have gone through such a traumatic experience? I quickly barged into my messy room and grabbed my bag and a few items. 

This house is cursed, I need time to plan and think, I thought. Ideas bounced around in my head as I stuffed makeup and other essentials into my purse. I exited my room making sure to slam my door, notifying everyone about my anger. I threw on my heels and made my way down the stairs, ready to take my leave. Stephan was on his way up the stairs when he stopped. He was dressed in a pair of sweatpants with a RAMONES T-shirt. 

"What's the matter?" he asked me, raising an eyebrow. 

"Your brother's an asshole, I knew I should've picked you," I said coldly before adding, "or maybe both of you are off the bend." He laughed before shaking his head, taking a sip of the warm drink in his white mug. "You never change, do you?" He asked, making me scoff and hurry past him. I opened the front door and exited, leaving him in the dust. 

I wanted to smoke

I wanted to drink

I wanted to make him pay

       I've been loyal to Stephan and Xander ever since my family made the deal with them. We would financially help them out and in return, I get to keep them as a toy. The tables flipped when his family got creative. They thought up a business and made much more money than we anticipated. My family ended up needing me to try and bring them back over to our side again. As long as they stayed wounded, we were doing well. 

          Thoughts flickered through my mind as I popped open my bag to take out a pack of cigarettes. I slid one out and casually lit it, trying to forget about the poison that lives under the same roof as me. After the cigarette as done, I took out my phone and typed in the number saved from months ago.

If you ever get sick of them, you'll always have me, The male voice rang inside my head. I smirked, pressing the 'call' icon as the line began to rang.

"I've been expecting you," the voice said. I chuckled, biting my lip softly.

"I enjoy the chase, you know that Adam."