farfalla

XXXI.

"I have to ask you something," I said laying down next to Harry on his bed. The sun was setting and everything was winding down from the day.

Turning to face me he nodded for me to go on. From the way our relationship had changed, I wanted to know his real feelings about some of our exchanges.

"Do you remember that night I asked to sleep in your bed?" I asked Harry sitting up and crossing my legs. I still to this day wondered what his real thoughts were about it.

"Of course I do," Harry answered putting his hands behind his head.

"Did you really not like sleeping next to me?" I remember when I had asked him the first time upon waking up he said he didn't sleep great because of me. I had felt deflated because I had enjoyed my time in bed with him and thought he felt the same way the way his arm was wrapped around me.

"No, that was the best nights sleep I had gotten in a long time but I couldn't admit that to you," Harry answered as I laid back down on top of his chest. Facing him he moved one of his hands till it glazed over my hair. Closing my eyes I hummed lightly to his touch that I grew so accustomed to.

"Why can't we run away together?" I asked him already half knowing the answer. Harry was afraid he couldn't protect me from the entire world around us. I was wanted by many and it was a lot for one person.

"You already know why." He answered simply to my question. Taking in a deep sigh I blew it out and tangled one of my fingers in his cross necklace that hung around his neck.

"Let's be different people. We don't have to be Mia and Harry. We could be Maya and Harrison, we could be anyone we wanted." The dream of us running away from these lives haunted me every day. What I was willing to give for a new life away from all this complicated drama.

"It's not as easy as you may think it is," Harry spoke still running fingers through my blonde hair that was growing out at the roots. I hadn't gotten my hair done in months now and my roots were beginning to grow in quite a bit.

"I'm tired of running. That's all I have been doing for the past 22 years, running from my past." I blinked slowly feeling a wave of exhaustion crash over me.

"I'm running with you now," Harry told me as I moved up to lay on his bicep instead. I wanted to lay in his arm even though I knew I couldn't. I wanted to sleep next to Harry but Niall would hardly allow it.

"Can I lay with you?"

"I think you already know the answer to that." Harry frowned just as I nuzzled myself into him, wrapping my arm around his torso and laying my head on his armpit.

"I don't want to sleep alone." I basked in Harry's body heat wanting to close my eyes and fall asleep right then and there even though I still had my jeans and t-shirt on.

"What do you want me to do about it?" Harry asked me averting his eyes down and to his left where I laid looking at him.

"Turn off the lights and shut the door," I instructed letting a smirk curl up onto my lips.

"You oversimplify things, Princess," Harry informed me as he sighed out loudly for me to hear.

"And you over complicate things," I replied back seeing him shake his head with a scoff.

"What are you going to say to Niall when he sees us together like this?"

"If he has a problem I'll tell him to go fuck himself." I bit my lip in a smile, waiting for Harry to look back down at me.

"I wouldn't say that that is appropriate language for a lady, Miss Frost." Niall appeared in the doorway as if on cue. My smile fading quicker then it had appeared I shot up and gave off a more serious expression.

"I think it would be best if you find your own bed," Niall suggested to me with icy blue eyes that were entrancing.

"I would feel safer if I could stay in Harry's room with him," I stated giving Niall direct eye contact while the rest of my body language gave off a stern emotion.

"I don't think that's such a good idea. How many times do we have to have this conversation Miss Frost?" My irritation was growing the more Niall called me Miss Frost. I was tired of him getting into my business with Harry. I needed human touch and I needed affection. I hadn't felt a type of love like Harry's, not even Louis held a candle to what I feel with Harry.

"Stop calling me that, its Mia. Secondly, I'm a big girl Niall, I can make my own decisions. I don't need your input on everything and nor did I ask for it." I was always obedient but I didn't see anything wrong with what I was doing. All I wanted was to stay in bed with Harry tonight, I didn't see a problem in that.

"Mia, your father appointed me to keep you in check. Not only that but I'm also here to make sure you are in a secure location at all times-" I cut him off here with a rebuttal.

"Wouldn't the most secure place I could be is in here with Harry? Harry is a specially trained assassin as you have stated before. Due to this, wouldn't I be the most secure on his presence?" I tilted my head as I turned Niall's argument back around to him. I had made a valid point he couldn't just brush over.

"Mia-"

"No, I think I've won darling. Now if you could close the door and shut the light off on your way out it would be much appreciated." I gave a smug smile while gesturing for him to get out.

I didn't normally challenge others like that and win. I always did as I was told but ever since I had met Harry things changed in my personality. I was changing and I didn't know if it was for the better or not.

Watching Niall scowl he shut the door behind him as he stomped away. As soon as privacy was given I stripped off my shirt until I was solely in my bra. Tugging at my jeans I slid them off and went to lay back on Harry. Arms wrapping around his torso I felt him kiss my forehead sweetly as I hummed lightly.

"Since when did you become so feisty?" Harry asked me while I found myself in a comfortable position under the sheets.

"Since I realized I'm a total people pleaser. I put others above myself always and it's gotten me nowhere." I explained delving into deep thoughts while Harry cuddled me.

"It's gotten you right here." Harry reminded causing me to close my eyes and smile softly before I yawned. I was tired and ready to get some rest with Harry right by my side. 

"I guess that's true." I nuzzled myself further into Harry before letting my muscles and mind relax. I kept my eyes closed and let my wildest dreams run wild. Maybe tonight would be different, maybe my nightmares wouldn't come back to haunt me.

With Harry next to me, holding me the way he was, made me feel safe. I was safe with him.

-October 09, 2016