Devil's Awakening: A Dark Whispers Novel -book 1-

Chapter 19: The Truth Is Bitter Sweet'

Chapter 19: The Truth Is Bitter Sweet

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Many Years Later

How corrupt can man kind get? How can man blatantly lie and steel with no shame? How is this okay...It's NOT. A man once told me I was meant for a greater thing, to become the hope and life for all. Yet, I feel nothing for these, murders, liars, thieves, adulterers. What they have done is unforgivable, I don't feel the need to try and love them, to give them eternal peace. It's not fair for those who truly deserve it. But how can anyone who s damned be worthy of peace? It doesn't make sense. 

I'm so torn. Nothing is right. Not me, not this place and certainly not Hades. Yet the more time I spend here I feel something slowly creeping into me. Something barren, foreign, something...dark. 

Something truly dark is edging its way into me, like a snake slithering around its prey, wringing it of life. Suffocation. The more Hades opens me to the darkness the more I like it. I'm tempted as if I was eve, being seduced by a snake, drawn to eat the forbidden fruit. I feel as if I have been starved a life time and only now I am getting my fill. Of what exactly?

Vengeance? No, I have no vengeful thoughts. Payment, maybe. The sins of man don't go unpunished. Maybe that's what I crave. Punishment on those who deserve it, but what about those that don't...

They are damned just as the sinners are. Do they deserve it? Surely all mankind has sinned. i have, I know that. Do I deserve punishment? Perhaps I do or did. Is this not punishment? I would think so. Living here, myself damned to these wretched souls. We are bound, tied to each others own fate. I guess all deserve punishment for something they have done in a past life. 

Makes sense, well to me it does. To Hades i guess so too...

Hmmm, Hades. I don't know what I feel for this demon. I surely do not feel love. I put the capacity to feel love away long ago, when...when I first loved. A man I think, NO a god. Yes, that's it, he was a god. Which god though? 

Well it matter not now, I cannot remember. What do I remember though? What happened all those years ago that got me to this place? Was I born here? No, life cannot flourish here. Was I brought, taken or was I willing? 

Perhaps I was willing, it is better to think I was willing. Hades wouldn't allow me to think other wise. I don't mind though, he after all saved me. He took away the possibility of death. He said I feared death, said it was the one thing that was my weakness. Said he did what I wanted, but I cannot remember. 

Should I want to remember? I guess not if I can't in the first place. 

I don't really have a purpose here anymore though, was I here to pleasure the needs of a man called my mate? A mate I do not love but lust for. That feeling is vigorous, so strong and foreboding. He lusts for me, I like it, or i think I do. 

Or do I hate it? No, I like it. I have to, but is that sinful to lust for a man, a man you do not love. To give your body over to one who shouldn't have a right to your privacy. But he says he does, except I can't push away the feeling that it is wrong, but he says it's so right. He says its right because pleasurable things cannot be sinful. But he is sin itself, so how does that work?

Why, is this so confusing? Why am I even thinking this way? 

'Because you know the truth' a voice whispered as the bitter cold wind whipped across my face. This is not rare. hell has many secrets and mysteries. The wind speaks, sighs and sings. No, not beautiful happy songs. Dark and alluring songs, with which you have to be careful.