Trepidation | Sitkolson [ C ]

Chapter 14 | Perfect Reason

His eyes weren't full of surprise. They weren't full of shock, or anger. They were full of wonder.

Maybe he was actually considering it. Maybe he was just wondering why I wasn't leaving him. Or maybe he was wondering why exactly I said what I did. Either way, I wanted answer out of him. Hopefully, what I thought was, the right one.

"Why?" He asked, taking a small step forward.

I played with my lip rings, "I don't want you living here. I... Please?"

Ryan looked down, frowning.

It had to have been hard. He was practically pushed into this life, and forced to make his own decisions that most adults can't even make. I guess that's why he seemed so much more mature than people his age. That's probably why he seemed older.

"Are you sure?" He questioned, looking back up at me.

I nodded, "Yes."

"Hundred percent?" He raised an eyebrow and I chuckled.

"Hundred and ten."

Ryan bit his lip, looking like he was trying to hold back a grin. He hesitated before taking a small step forward, then walked the short distance to me and wrapped his arms around my torso.

I was more than surprised. Ryan had never hugged me like this. I mean, it was always me who did, but not him. I was happy, though, because it seemed like he was finally opening up to me. And, if I'm honest, I didn't want it to change.

"Quick," I smiled upon pulling away, "Devin and Kylie might still be out, so pack your things and meet me outside."

Ryan nodded and quickly spun around and threw his things into a bag just as quick.

Honestly, I couldn't believe he actually said yes. If you had told me when I had only known Ryan for a week that I'd be asking him to live with me so he didn't have to live off of a bed, I would've told you you were insane. I may have been a kid, but I was sure this would be a lot better. It had to be.

| | |

I grabbed Ryan's hand and pulled him into my room just as the front door opened.

"Ricky?" I heard Devin call out, "You home?"

I knew Kylie was with him, so I decided to play along that I wasn't home. I knew they'd want to watch a movie or something. As much as I liked them, I didn't want to leave Ryan in my room for hours. I'd rather get him settled, too.

At the sound of feet making their way to my door, I pulled Ryan towards my wardrobe, shutting the door behind me.

"What're-"

I raised my hand to his mouth, silencing him.

The wardrobe was dark, and pretty small, so Ryan and I were practically against each other. Inches away from him, I could smell his deodorant and the faint smell of car gas.

When the door shut, Ryan stuck his tongue out and licked my hand, causing me to quickly pull it away and wipe it on his shirt.

"Ew, Ryan," I whined, though I kept my voice down.

He chuckled and leaned forward to open the wardrobe door, "Sorry, it slipped."

I rolled my eyes and stepped out, "Sure."

Ryan grinned with light pink cheeks, "Thanks again, for letting me stay with you."

With a wave of my hand, I walked past Ryan and grabbed his bag, "It was the least I could do."

"Still..." He scratched the back of his neck, "Thank you."

I smiled and handed him his bag, "You can get changed real quick. I'll be back."

I ran out of my room and downstairs to where Kylie and Devin were watching a movie on the couch. I snuck past them and grabbed a few movies for Ryan and I, successfully making my way upstairs without catching the attention of Kylie and Devin.

"Hey, I picked a few movies out, some were random. Any preferences?"

From his place on the edge of my bed, Ryan looked to me, "Uh, any, really."

I picked the movie that was on the top, 'The Mist'.

Jenna was a pretty big fan of reading, and somehow Stephen King. She may not have seemed like that type, but she sure did have a lot of his books. Her and Devin.

I put the movie on, then laid down next to Ryan on the bed.

A few minutes into the movie, I shifted. It wasn't that it was awkward, but that I was more uncomfortable. I'm one of the people who like to spread themselves out on a massive bed whilst watching a movie. With Ryan lying next to me, it was kind of hard for me to do that.

Biting my lip, I threw my legs up and dropped them in Ryan's lap, grabbing a pillow and placing it down so I could lay diagonally.

"You okay there?" Ryan asked, looking down at me with a smirk.

I nodded, "I am now, thanks."

He chuckled and rested his hands on my thighs, going back to watching the movie.

Occasionally, I found myself looking back to Ryan, who was so involved in the movie he didn't even notice me.

It was cute how he would frown when he was confused, or how his eyes would widen slightly whenever someone died. Or how whenever he knew something bad was going to happen, he would grip onto my thighs in anticipation. His actions got a rise out of me. A positive one, too.

Sensing that I was looking at him, Ryan turned to look at me with a frown.

"What?"

I smiled, "You're cute when you're scared."

With red cheeks, Ryan looked back to the TV, "Thanks...?"

After a second or two, Ryan looked at me from the corner of his eye, smiling.

His small smile gave me the biggest one. Maybe it was a good idea to let him in. Maybe it was a good idea that he let me in. There was a voice telling me that everything would be okay, and that it'd be the same. And, I believed it, because that's what I wanted. I guess, though, that with every good thing that happens, something bad does.