I have everything, except you - Thomas Brodie Sangster fic

15. Jitters

The last chapter was really crap because I accidentally hit publish when I was half way through so had to quickly edit.. Anyway here's another to hopefully make up for the disappointing one ;)

"You should sit up straighter, it'll be easier." Thomas encouraged from his chair on the otherside of the room. He was spread out across it, his legs dangling over one arm and his head over the other. I sighed, my breath trembling. 

"Ten minutes!" Mr Archer called from the main room. I froze. "I think i'm going to be sick," I said, turning to Thomas. 

He pulled up his chair next to mine and turned me towards him, his hands on my shoulders. He rubbed small circles on them whilst trying to calm me down. "You know you'll do great. You've been practicing so hard, and it's virtually perfect. Once you get up there you'll forget about everyone, classmates, Mr Archer, even me. It's just you and the piano. Besides, it'll all be over in three minutes, you're not even sitting up there that long," He smiled, it was a genuine one, and it worked. 

"Yeah, it's only three minutes, three minutes of bravery then it's over," I said, mostly to myself. "There you go, come on, run through it one more time," He said, and I did, without fault. It was getting easier to play in front of him, but there was still doubt in the back of my mind about playing and singing in front of the class. 

First up was a loud, confident girl who performed something out of some musical, I was too worried to note which one. Thomas went second, and everyone was in awe of his voice and bass guitar skill, because the room was silent up until the very end, when everyone went wild. I didn't understand how he could be so calm and steady, it didn't even seem to faze him.

Then my name was called.

I stood up, my entire body felt weak.

My teeth were chattering to the point where I could hardly speak, let alone sing.

My throat was clenched like someone was gripping it in their fist.

"What song are you doing today, Milly?" 

"Ahg.." My voice cracks. I stand in shock in front of everyone, and i'm too terrified to even cry.

Thomas stands up, a worried frown on his face.

"Uh, Thomas, could you please take Milly outside for some air," Mr Archer motioned for Thomas to take me, which he did without hesitating. 

*

He sits me down on a bench outside, handing me a bottle of water. I lift my hand up to take it but it's shaking too much. He sits beside me, wrapping his thin arms around my shoulders. I just sit, still dazed. 

"I.. I don't know what happened.. I just..," I start crying, as everything catches up to me. I found that I didn't want to let my tears out in front of him, it made me feel like I was being annoying and stupid.

"Shh, hey, it's okay. You got nervous, but it's fine." Thomas soothes me. "No it isn't, I feel like i've let everyone down. Especially you," I add, covering my face with my hands.

"No way, you haven't let me down at all! Mr Archer will understand, don't even worry about that." He paused, looking down. 

"Hey, do you wanna come over sometime? I mean, my dad's a good teacher, and i'm sure he'd have some tips for stage fright and stuff,"

I smiled. "Really? Would he help me? That would be so cool!" I hugged him back, letting the terrifying moment in the music room disintegrate from my thoughts. 

*

At lunch I kept smiling over at Thomas, and he waved at me to come sit with him, but I shook my head slightly, and although I was worried he would take it the wrong way, he nodded and seemed to understand. 

"Who are you looking at, Milly? Do you and that guy know each other or something? Patricia questioned, looking over at his table as well.  "I didn't know you were into the stuck up hipster snobs," She said, giggling like I couldn't possibly like any of them. Steph tried to help. "I think he's more the strong, silent type," She said, and I widened my eyes at her, implying that she was betraying my secret to Patricia. 

"Is there something you guys aren't telling me? Because, seeing as we're "best friends" I think I ought to know," Patricia looked suspicious. I looked at Stephanie, then nodded while sighing. She was better at explaining things than me. 

"Okay, she doesn't like him, don't worry! He was a jerk to her at the start of the term, so she's trying to get him to fall in love with her, just to prove to him that she's way out of his league," Stephanie sipped her drink. "Oh, that makes sense," Patricia replied, with another quick glance over to their table. 

"Yeah," I added, although I was beginning to wonder if I was out of his league.