Hetalia self-harm and depression (Canada) (PruCan)

Chapter 17

Gilbert's POV:
I was forced to return to school the next day, and sadly I had a lot of work to catch up on. My eyes began to close, head hurting from a hangover. Last night I was able to get ahold of alcohol, I had to steal it from the gas station, but got it anyways.

The things an addiction will do to you I guess.

Just as I was drifting off, hoping to sleep off the headache, Ivan poked me with his pencil, I looked at him, eyes likely looking dead.

"Skip with me next period."

He requested in a whisper, looking back down at his paper. I silently agreed, trying to concentrate on the math problems, hoping to finish at least 3/4 of them so I didn't have another paper to worry about.

An antiderivative of function f divided by an antiderivative of function g is an antiderivative of function f / g.

I sighed, head hurting so bad that I couldn't even begin to think about math. I stared at the paper the last 15 minutes of class, seeing Ivan giving me worried looks out of the corner of my eye.

Ivan.

Such a interesting boy, so many people are scared of him, I used to be when Feliciano talked about him when he Skyped my brother, and when I met him, I was afraid, but yesterday...yesterday he was so nice, helping me and trying to make me laugh all day.

The bell rings, signaling that class was now (thankfully) over. I gather my stuff, looking to Ivan, hoping the offer to skip was still there. He  gave me a smile.

"Come Gilbert, да?"

I nod, following him out of the class and down the hall. I didn't know where we were going, but we got outside and starting walking towards the student parking lot.

"I'm able to drive without an adult, I got a special pass even though I'm not 16 yet. You see, Katrya isn't allowed to drive because of her illness and Natalia is obviously too young, so they need someone in the family to drive, which left me."

He walked to the drivers side of a gray, four door car, motioning me to get in. I do, sitting in the passenger seat. He starts the car, pulling out of the parking space and out of school grounds.

"Where are we going?"

He gives me a smile, not taking his eyes off the road.

"A park, but I actually want to talk."

I nod, hoping it would be a easy talk.

"Did you drink last night?"

I stay silent, growing uncomfortable by his serious tone of voice. My lack of an answer seemed to tell it all.

"I know it's difficult Gilbert, I...had an addiction to it that only ended 4 months ago."

My eyes go wide, as I probably never would have guessed.

"I knew from a young age I would have one, my dad had one and I would always try a bit, but always wanted more."

A small tear fell from his eyes, and I grew even more shocked at Ivan crying in front of me.

"It lasted 3 years, starting at 12 and continuing until, like I said, 4 months ago, meaning I was about 15 and a half...it was Yao that got me to stop."

Even though tears were threatening to fall from his eyes, he still smiled at the mention of his boyfriend.

"It took 8 months, but I stopped depending on it for happiness, instead going to Yao when I was sad."

His smile fell, turning into a frown.

"One time I...accidentally slapped Yao when I was drunk, you see Gil, I often get mad when drunk, going to places so I could fight."

He paused for a moment.

"Yao forgave me the next day, and that's when I knew I had to try to stop drinking, I didn't want to hurt my Yao-Yao, or my sisters, (I gasped, and he shook his head) I never have! I always lock myself in my room if I don't leave the house...I could never hurt my sisters."

The smile he gave me had so many emotions in it, finally looking towards me at a red light.

"I feel like Mattie will help you, and you can help him...he...has a addition as well you know, but no one would ever guess."

I grow curious, but also afraid it was like mine.

"He's addicted to both marijuana and...well, self harm, rather it be cutting, burning, pulling his hair, scratching, even banging his head against a wall, he's probably done it all."

I slam my fist on my leg, and he jumps, startled by my sudden outburst.

"Marijuana!?"

I yelled, and he nodded sadly.

"Found out 3 weeks ago, after Yao and I found him with his girl named Megan, who goes to our school but is in 12th grade, both smoking it. Mattie was a complete mess."

My mind was still racing, planning to talk to Mattie about this as soon as possible.

"Red eyes, barely recognized we were there, he kept saying there was a magical polar bear and moose next to him, and told us multiple crazy things when we took him to Yao's house, knowing he wouldn't want his family to know."

He parked the car, as we had arrived at the park.

"We took care of him until the next day, calling Alfred and telling him that Mattie was going to chill with us for a bit. He's not super addicted to it, mostly self harming when upset, but sometimes he gets too stressed, calls up Megan and they meet up on the roof of the school."

With a look towards me, looking into my shocked eyes, he opens his door, I do the same.

"Let's just walk, да? There's a wonderful trail through those trees that I always walk when stress, Yao suggested it and it really works."

With a hand on my shoulder and a small smile, he starts off, I join him, mind racing with the new information learned.