Rejected By My Mate

14

After I let daddy convince me to get out of bed I met up with Evelyn at the door. She looked me up and down and rolled her eyes. "By god you're ugly." she shoved her hands in her pockets.

"How come you're still here?" I asked. Evelyn shot me a nasty look.

"You need your other outcast and quirky best friend." the grunge girl grunted. "She's outside."

"So it isn't a boy?"

"No." she shook her head. "No boy would poke you with a ten foot pole."

"That's true." I nodded. At least Evelyn was honest. "So who is she?"

Evelyn grunted again and waved me outside, where a skinny, pretty, perfect Victoria's Secret angel sat on the hood of the car. She screamed. "Evelyn! Get the broom, I think you just got followed by a rat!"

Evelyn groaned extremely loudly and smacked herself in the forehead. "That is a person, Emelie. That is not a rat." she sighed. "What the bleepity bleep did you do with your glasses now your dumb bleep?"

I looked to Emelie and rose an eyebrow. "How come she keeps saying bleep?"

"No one in cliche teen fiction actually swears." she bobbed her blonde head dumbly. "Eve, I told you when I drove here I left my glasses in the blender while I mixed my vegan protein shake. Jeez, why don't you listen?"

Evelyn drew in a sharp breath and pinched her nose. "Because every time you speak my IQ drops seventy bleeping percent."

"Oh," Emelie nodded. "Okay. But, what's the rat for?"

"You have to make her attractive. We're making the ex badboy jealous."

"Oh my, that is super not doable." Emelie shook her head at me and muttered nopity nope nope under her breath. Evelyn muttered something in exasperation under her breath and pulled out a one hundred dollar starbucks gift card. Emelie piped up right away and jumped off the hood of the car.

"Give her a makeover? Oh Evie why didn't you just say so?" the model was reaching for the gift card, which Evelyn pushed away from her.

"She looks attractive first. Then you get your bribe."

"Aww." Emelie pouted, took me by my wrist and shoved me into the car. "We have work to do, girl I dont know."

"My name is Peaches Freeberry Jane."

"I'm not going to remember that."