Merry-Sue: The Girl From BC

A Marvelously Myrna-liscious Makeover

For a few days now, Merry-Sue has been occupying the Wellington residence along with her new "step-sister", Myrna. The spoiled teenage girl (and her parents for that matter) was reluctant to share her space and air with a filthy cave girl, but, with the deal they made, it was decided Merry-Sue had best truly represent herself as a member of the family. At least until the previous. . . mishap. . . blew over with her teachers. For her, personally, it wasn't all that bad. It was getting pretty cold and stale in that dog house anyway.

"How did your parents smooth things over with the principal and Mrs Dean?" Merry-Sue had asked upon arriving at the huge Wellington family mansion, "And how did you convince them to go along with this?"

"My family is adept at blackmail," Myrna shrugged, clicking her fingers so her servants would open the large enterance gates for her, "And so am I."

Merry-Sue was give the whole package and, between her own personal bathroom, servants and fully-stocked minifridge, she felt like royalty again. If Mother could see this, she thought, she wouldn't even give a backward glance at our doorless house.

But Merry-Sue came to find that the celebrity life wasn't all it was cut out to be. She had barely enough time to set down her backback in her new bedroom, complete with a queen sized bed and flat screen TV, and request for a customized bed for Bobby, when Myrna burst her bubble.

"We have to get straight to work," she informed the cave girl, "We have to make you look presentable before the next semester starts. And believe me, we're gonna need all the time we can get."

Merry-Sue soon descovered that being pretty didn't just come naturally. . . Or so Myrna kept saying. The first portion of her gradual transformation was really tough and messy. Myrna made Merry-Sue change into a pair of really tight shorts and a crop top and follow her to this thing called a "Jim". It was this really spacious room on the 3rd floor of her mansion with a high ceiling and windows that covered the entirety of the outside wall. It was full of sickeningly pink torture-machines and really, weird sticks. There was even a private pool next door! Merry-Sue was looking forward to going for a swim, when a really lean and muscular woman in a traicksuit and a whistle hanging around her neck came storming in behind them.

"ON YOUR KNEES SOLDIERS, I WANT 10 PUSH UPS!" her voice was suprisingly manly.

Myrna fell to the floor beside Merry-Sue and began weirdly heaving herself off the ground with her arms, like she was trying to get up, but kept falling right back down. Merry-Sue was utterly perplexed until Commander Pain (that was literally the woman's name) explained all the sience about exercising and shaping your body. Ten minutes into the workout, Merry-Sue was truly appreciating why she'd dubbed all those contraptions inside The Jim 'torture machines'.

She did, however, suprise Coach Pain with how physically strong and adaptable she was. She excelled compared to Myrna, but if she thought this would earn her anything, she was dead wrong. Sargent Pain-In-The-Cave-Butt only pushed her even more. Finally, after an hour, Merry-Sue got to stop torturing herself. She made for the pool, thinking to relax a little bit, but Myrna had still other ideas.

"Get over here. We need to take a picture for Instagram," she told Merry-Sue and dragged her by the elbow over to a full lenght miror in the corner of the room. She made a funny pose and kept alternating between sticking her tongue out and grinning and winking.

"What are we doing?" Merry-Sue asked, feeling rather awkward and exposed.

"I just told you," Myrna hissed, "We're posting pictures so everyone can see how hard we worked. Then all the girls will be jealous and all the guys will think we're totally girlfriend-material!"