Where Am I

Soon (15)

sorry this chapter is so short ;((((

tylers p.o.v

"Josh what the fuck." I yelled from inside the house as Josh slammed the door in left.

What the hell is his problem. I wake up this morning and he hasnt said one word to me, not even acknowledge my presents. When I walked into the same room as him he would walk out, not even make eye contact. I thought he was just having a hangover so I didn't pay to much attention to it, that's until he came downstairs with a bag and left right out the door, taking the car. That's when my stomach dropped and I started to worry. I run out the door but he is already gone, that's when I notice a folded up piece of paper on the floor, which is a letter. I opened it up to see it was from Josh, it said:

Dear Tyler,

I love you so much, and you know that. And maybe I'm just overreacting but my gut is telling me I'm not. Yesterday at the party you were wasted and Jenna was all over you, grinding, making out, everything. I pushed her off and decided to take you home. Thats when you started rambling on how great Jenna is and that it wasnt the first time she did it to you. Idk what you and her did at the hospital that past week but i sure dont trust it. So im taking a little break from us to figure it out and get my mind straight. im sorry tyler xx.
- Josh

I dropped the paper and my body fell with it on the living room floor. I didn't know what he was talking about, fuck, I didn't even know what to think. Josh legitimately hates me now, I'm all alone, I have nobody. The one person I truley care about is now gone somewhere and i dont know if I will ever see him again. Next thing I know is im crying, and not just little tears dripping, I think I was having a panic attack.

10 minutes have passed and im possibly minutes away from passing out. My hands and feet are going numb, Im sweating, everythings blurry and in slow motion, and I can barley breath. I was grasping for air from through the screaming and crying. Then everything goes black again, I'm guessing I passed out. But then I hear voices. It sounds like laughter, but not just any laughter, it was my friends, from the party the other day. Then it gets quiet again. Not for too long though when a huge "Hello" thunders my eardrums. Its that voice again.

"Please leave me alone, whoever you are."

"Oh Tyler, I can't leave you alone. Because I am you, I'm Tyler Robert Joseph."

"Whatever, this is all just some nightmare."

"The only nightmare is your life. You can't do anything right thats why Josh doesnt love you anymore."

"I didn't do anything though." I try to wipe my tears to show confidence but there is to much flow.

"Thats not how he sees it, he finally sees how worthless you are and that you dont deserve him."

I start to ignore him now.

"You can ignore me all you want Tyler, but I will always be in your head reminding you that you need to just end your life already, but i'll leave you be for now."

And he is gone, and I wake up and it's already past 8 o'clock. My panic attack is over, and my mind is blank. I cant stay in this house anymore, so I head out. As always I don't know where Im going, but I think I'm heading south, eh I'm not good with directions. The wind will take me somewhere, I don't wanna be heard. I want to be listened to, but I think I'll just change my name. I might just shut out everyone and maybe this blurryface guy will leave me alone, only time tells. And hopefully it comes by soon.