My Complete 180°

Preparing To Change

Ariks party was today.
Im still comtemplating wether I should go or not.

Me, Helga G. Pataki, has been texting and calling Arik for the past week, NONSTOP. Some days i even forget im living with my crazy family due to the funny and hilarious conversations he always seems to start.

*Bing!

Arik: you coming?

Helga: maybe...

I close my eyes and let my body fall on to my bed. I hear my phone go off again. I didnt want to talk to him today, besides I know im going to the party. I pick up my phone to scroll through our messages...

Helga: is it Lolly? Lilly? I forgot her name😒

Arik: Lulu

Helga: yeah, thats a stupid name. She talked to me some time ago, trying to intimidate me. Which was a stupid idea.

Arik: i dont want to talk about her.

Helga: ?? Why not

Arik: i dont want to.

Helga: you guys know each other or something?

Arik: can you stop.

Helga: she's your ex isnt she.

Arik: maybe

Helga: do you want to talk about it?

Arik: umm. Obviously not.

Helga: come on Arik. I told you my secret.

Arik: and i told you mine too, so we are even. There is no reason for you to get in my business.

Helga: that wasn't even a secret, i could have figured out you had a boner for Hilda in 2 seconds flat.

Arik: same for you

Helga: fine, be like that😒

Arik: if you come to the party tomorrow, maybe i can make an exception.

Helga: you should know by now, I hate parties.

Arik: you dont hate food though😏

Helga: ill think about it.

Arik: 😊 okay

I smiled slightly. You can even call it a blush. I knew it from the first time he called me. I was catching feelings for Arik. I haven't been reciting any poetry, Phoebe is hardly free because of Gerald.

I roll my eyes.

And Arnold, ever since he helped me when I got sick that one day, i couldnt speak up the courage to say thank you without following it up with "i love you".
I wish i was more open. I wish I could get some advice from him, but its not like i can just walk up to him and express myself.

I was losing myself slowly. The things i used to do, i dont do anymore, the people i use to talk to, i dont talk to anymore.

And most especially, im losing Arnold.
Thats the last thing I ever wanted to move on from.

The last time I talked to him, i asked what was the homework for math class, knowing full well that i did it already. Everytime my heart swooned and excitment increased as i waited his reply.