Three is a Crowd

Chapter~IMMATURE

It’s the middle of summer vacation. I was looking forward to this since this is the last summer for me as a high school student. I’m going to be a senior next year. I thought, finally I’m graduating soon. All I could think of was that in a year’s time, I’ll be in college like Luke.

Oh, by the way, my name is Allie. Now, you might think that I live a cliché fairytale life, but no… Today, three years ago, the old Allie died.

 ~*-*~

“I’m sorry…” He couldn’t look at me straight in the eye. I looked at him in disbelief. I was expecting him to suddenly grin and say, “Fooled ‘ya!” But he did none of those. He looked as guilty as a kid caught with his hand in a cookie jar. “I didn’t want to hurt you, I swear. I—”

“Then why?!” I cut him off. I too was surprised by my anger.

He kept quiet while I tried to hold my tears.

“Al, I can explain.” He tried to reach my shoulder.

“Explain then.” I shrugged his hand off, trying to keep calm.

“You know me, right? I don’t want to keep any secrets from you. That’s why I want to let go of you so I won’t make further damages.”

“Why wouldn’t we just fix this then? Forgive then forget. It isn’t easy but it is better than totally breaking up. I’ll just be angry for a while then everything will be back to normal.”

“No, it won’t. I’d regret what I’d done every time I would see you.”

I couldn’t believe what I’m hearing. How could this guy be so dense to what I’m feeling? I’d forgive him, yes, because I love him that much. I didn’t care how big of a problem it would be. There wouldn’t be anything we couldn’t fix, right?

“I’m sorry… I can’t hurt you anymore.”

“Then tell me. Why are you breaking up with me?”

“Because I…” His breathing was deep, as though he was afraid to say the wrong thing and I’ll eat him up.

“Go on. I’ll stay quiet and wait till you are ready to tell me.”

“Because I’m in love with someone else!” He turned his back on me, afraid that I might start hitting him with the book that is within my reach. Suddenly, I felt like my head is spinning. My eyes started to blur with tears. The wind coming from the window seems cold and damp. The rain started to pour outside, like as though the sky is crying with me.

“Al, I—” I shushed him off. Suddenly, I wanted to be alone. I felt my legs turn Jell-O and then I was sitting on the floor. He kneeled in front of me and hugged me. I was stunned. I couldn’t speak. Tears fell uncontrollably. I wanted to hit him, let him feel how much I’m aching right now. I wanted to push him away and avoid him for the rest of my life. But all I did was stay there, crying in his embrace, savouring the last time we would be together because tomorrow I know he will tell the girl of his dreams that he loves her. And the realization hit hard. I’m not the girl of his dreams.

“Al, say something, please…”

“Why? What does she have that I don’t?”

“Honestly? I’ve already told you… I don’t want to end up marrying a kid. I wished that you’d me more, you know, mature. I told myself to give you time but, I couldn’t wait that long.”

That was when it hit me. Idiot. Such a petty reason to fall for someone else. Because of me being immature, I lost the man of my dreams…